How do I deal with feelings of sadness and loneliness during the day?

Question

Things have not gone so well in my life. I feel lonely and sad during the day. I feel like calling a friend, but they are usually busy. I do work currently full-time, but am new at the job and don't know the people too well yet.

I check e-mail many times throughout the day hoping that people that I have sent e-mails to will respond. I don't get any responses though and that makes me feel more sad.

How should I talk myself through this feeling of sadness, loneliness and general blue feeling during the day?

I do feel sad because I had a choice to be with people on Thanksgiving, but instead stayed alone and now regret it. I am trying to learn from my mistake and plan a fun Christmas for myself.

I am divorced and live with my parents. My child is 14 and lives with her Dad in another state. I have visitation rights and could enforce them for her to come, but am not sure if I should.

Answer 1

The best ways to rid yourself of sadness and loneliness:

Join clubs any hobby you are interested in (chess club, astronomy club, bridge club, womens club etc) you will make all kinds of friends.

Get out of the HOUSE often. You need contact with people, any people (like at the store, library, swim center etc)

Get lots of exercize, it promotes serotonin for good feelings (go swim at a pool, jazzercise, biking, hiking, walks, tae bo etc).

Eat healthy, very important to nourish the mind so you wont be depressed (lots of fruit and veggies and lean meat) Also take supplements (vitamins and minerals and herbs) Talk to someone at a herb shop or health food store. They have amazing stuff.

Read Books (fiction for pleasure and non0fiction to learn about health, wellness, hobby, and more)

Get involved (community service, find something you can help with) My best days were spent helping others. Very important for your well-being.

Make contact with family and friends (make the effort to visit them, talk on phone and email them asap) See your child more often you are her mother and she needs you.

Here is an important book I want you to read. It can change your life for the better.
The Luck Factor by Dr. Richard Weisman (amazon)
Tells you the steps to make your life better, more luck in every aspect of living, even how to pick a mate. This is one of the best books I have ever read. Please read it too.

Good Luck & keep you chin up.

Answer 2

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
How do I deal with feelings of sadness and loneliness during the day?
Things have not gone so well in my life. I feel lonely and sad during the day. I feel like calling a friend, but they are usually busy. I do work currently full-time, but am new at the job and don't know the people too well yet.

I check e-mail many times throughout the day hoping that...

Answer 3

Perhaps that is the root of your saddness? You miss your child?
If you havent been depressed in the past then this is probably temporary. It's normal to feel alittle sad, especially around the holidays, I know, I've been feeling down myself. You wish you were around the people you love but they are no where to be found, right?
Maybe go to a therapist who can help you find where these feelings are really coming from, and then help you make choices to better yourself.
Definetly go if this has been a reoccuring problem for you. There's no shame in helping yourself feel good.
If you want another alternative, I beat the blues with getting involved at my gym. Exercise increases your endorphines (happy chemicals) plus it keeps you busy, and on top of that you'll feel good about doing something positive for yourself.
Also you can make new friends through exercise classes.
I hope my suggestions helped you, good luck and I hope you feel better soon! :)

Answer 4

I went through the same thing during my early twenties, I think you might have mild form of depression, Im not trying to scare you or nothing...

depresson can be cured jus like any other curable illness, admiting to the problem is the first and hardest part, tell your doctor exactly how you feel, and he'll administer the right drug for you...good luck...

I also found that taking part in family activities also helps you keep a happy frame of mind, keep yorself busy with hobbies you enjoy....the blues will soon wash away and you'll feel right as rain...I promise...

Answer 5

Just try and keep yourself busy do more than you have to,Don't check your mail till the end of the day its nice to have something to do when you've done everything else you might even find someone to talk to...Good Luck..

Answer 6

search your soul and find yourself. then find why your soul is sad. when you find your soul you;ll find yourself. once you'll find yourself see if you like yourself, if yes stay together and if not make yourself likeable. when you start loving and liking yourself you will find happyness. sadness will go away.

Answer 7

"GET OUT OF BED:

One of the most important things you can do is get up at about the same time every morning (even week-ends). Preferably, that means about 7 a.m. or earlier. You might not feel like it but Get Up. Such regularity helps your body function more normally so you're more likely to feel normal.

LIGHTS:

Light helps your body function better. So turn on a lot of lights as soon as you arise. Open curtains to get more sunlight. Better yet, go outdoors into the sunshine as soon as you can. Remove any eyewear so light will enter more readily (glass cuts out some of the sun's rays). But don't stare at the sun, of course.

MOVE:

Be active right away -- oxygenate! That means getting up and walking around your dwelling for five or 10 minutes, or perhaps riding an exercycle. Mild exercise gets the blood flowing and transports more oxygen throughout your body (especially to your brain), helping you feel mentally alert and alive.

MUSIC:

Select and play some energetic, happy music as you dress and have your breakfast. The audiovisual department of most libraries has albums and tapes you can check out.


BREAKFAST:

Begin your breakfast with protein (i.e., meat, eggs, peanut butter, nuts, cheese). When you get up, your body chemistry is ready to convert food, especially protein,into longlasting energy. To balance your most important meal of the day, add an orange or other fresh fruit and whole grain cereal or whole grain bread.

TALK WITH SOMEONE:

One of the quickest ways to beat the blues is to interact with others. You might not feel like doing that - you'd rather avoid people when blue. So make lt easier on yourself. Talk with someone you enjoy about a subject you enjoy so there is definite give and take.

And, force yourself to say "hello" to the persons next to you in class, those where you live, anyone around.

LIMIT CAFFEINE:

The long-term (four hours or so) effects of caffeine are depression. Try to limit coffee to no more than one cup in the morning. Coffee can make you more alert for an hour or so, but later you get an opposite reaction. Caffeine tends to increase the release of insulin in the blood, and insulin lowers the blood sugar level. When you have low blood sugar levels, you begin to feel less sure of yourself, and have low energy levels, which can lead to the blues or depression.

LIMIT SUGAR:

Sugar might give you an initial rush of energy, but within an hour or so the blood sugar level can become low, and when it's low you may feel low, too.

The caffeine/sugar cycle. It's easy to get caught in the caffeine and sugar cycle -- having coffee, caffeinated soft drinks, or something with sugar every two hours or so to "stay up." For example, cola contains about 10 teaspoons of sugar plus caffeine equal to about half a cup of coffee. In addition to bringing on the blues, this cycle can result in dependence, poor nutrition. and obesity -- reasons to get down on yourself even more and feel blue.

MAINTAIN FIBER:

Fiber helps food go through your digestive system at a proper rate, giving a more constant energy supply. Highly processed foods merely provide a quick surge of energy which can be followed by depression. You can maintain fiber in your diet by eating an orange or grapefruit rather than just drinking the juice. Eat fresh vegetables, fresh fruits, and whole grain breads and cereals.

STRESS B COMPLEX:

Some persons report receiving help by taking a concentrated vitamin B complex. You'll find these called something like "Stress B" or "B 50." This is controversial.
Some nutritionists say, "Yes, this really should be considered," and others say, "No, this is not a good Idea." You can try some and decide whether or not it helps you. If it does help, then perhaps you should consult a nutritionist to see if there are other ways you can augment your diet.

ROUTINES:

Changing your routines is another way to help shake the blues. Choose a different combination of clothes to wear, walk rather than drive, take a different route, eat at a different place. Do something different to help break the routine.

It's hard. Getting up in the morning, turning on the lights, eating a nutritious breakfast, keeping busy--keeping such a schedule is not always easy.

You might need help for the first few days, someone to help you form good habits, get you out of bed. turn on the lights, make sure you have a good breakfast, someone to help you be more active. One good way is to make a contract with a friend or friends who want to see you change. It might seem embarrassing, but
those friends want to see you healthy and happy rather than depressed and difficult to be around. Note: If you feel that you need the help of someone for more than three or four days, you probably should make an appointment with a counselor or psychotherapist. You don't want to wear out your friends!

DEVELOP SUPPORTS:

Good old-fashioned support works wonders. Most of us have not developed "support systems." We need to think about that idea ahead of time, if we have the tendency to feel blue, so that the supports can be available when needed. Plan ahead by filling out the last section of this publication and keep it handy. In addition to developing your own resources, you might know of some community support groups for persons with the blues. Call the local mental health center to see if there are some groups you might be a part of. Some places to call for leads at K-State will be listed at the end of this brochure.

What do I do when I feel myself coming down with the blues?

Recognize the change in yourself when you are "coming down" with an emotional slump. Don't deny it or feel guilty. Rather, take charge of yourself right away.

Perhaps taking a day off and doing some favorite things will restore you. Get more exercise: walk, garden, cycle, swim. You might not feel like it, but exercise is one of the best depression breakers and preventers.

PRETEND:

Put a smile on your face and pretend that you are happy. Stand straight rather than falling into that slouching, depressed posture. Sound hokey? Well, it isn't. Research demonstrates that forming a facial expression actually changes how you feel inside. And pretending to feel an emotion results in actually feeling it. Frowners feel sadder. And the depressing effects last for hours. So smile: at yourself and others, even trees or dogs or cats. Sure, it's tough to smile when you're feeling blue. The extra effort you muster to do it will help you break the blues.

Wear bright, happy clothes and pretend you are happy. You will then find yourself happy. Maybe, even wear a goofy shirt or blouse or cap so you can see others smile with you. Dressing cheerfully and pretending can beat the blues.

SEEK OUT HUMOR:

See a funny movie, read a humorous book, or listen to a comedy tape/CD. When you see a really funny cartoon, make a copy and save it. Consciously decide to use and employ these things when you find yourself coming down with the blues. Singing can help -- make yourself do it.

EXERCISE:

It's worth stating again: Exercise is a great way to break depression. Walk, go to the Rec Center and ride an exercycle, swim, or climb stairs if it's too cold or hot outside.

Do not give in to those inner blues that say, "I don't feel like it."
Doing almost anything constructive will be beneficial."

Answer 8

Stay positive, please! :)