What should I do about my parents?

Question

I am 22 and engaged to a girl that I met on True.com. We met 2 months ago. Yes, I know that this is fast, but we have both prayed about this and we know that this is right. The problem is my parents. They are seperated and do not get along very well. They are furious with me for being engaged. It is not only the fact that we met online. They think she is a loser and has no ambition because she had to drop out of high school to take care of herself. She is 19 and she plans to get her GED. They are also mad because she has no drivers license. She is getting that, in fact we went to the highway patrol office just today and got her a study book. My mom is telling my dad things that are not true about my fiancee. For example she told him that she told her that education means nothing to her. She never said anything remotely close to this. I was sitting right there when this supposedly happened.

My father thinks I am lying to them about a lot of things because of the things my mother is saying. This hurts me, because I have not told him a lie since I was 10 years old. I do not live with my parents and I know that I am an adult, but I love my parents and do not want to ruin my relationship with them. I also don't want to lose my fiancee. I know she loves me, but I am afraid she will get tired of my parents and leave me. What should I do to make my parents happier and put their fears to rest?

We do live together now. We havent been talking online for 2 months, we actually met face-to-face then.

Answer 1

If you love this girl go ahead and marry her. Your paren'ts arent going to be married to her. Within time they will accept her or not. My parents ended up divorced because my Dad's folks could never accept Mom. Even many years later they both would say in private that they still loved each other. I don't see any reason for living together for years at a time, marry your love! I don't drive! I use public transportation so I guess your parents would think badly of me. She is going back to school to get her G.E.D. Stand up for your woman. Don't regret it because of your parents! My parents did.

Answer 2

I agree with the sugestion about living together. Be very careful what you tell your Mom, she sounds very much like my mom. IMHO, a good Mom will realize that she will most likely never like the girls her sons pick, and she needs to learn not to be criticize. Opposite gender parents need to be quite. That said, if this girl is 19 why is she just now getting her dl, and it sounds like you went along. Does she have no drive herself. If she had two parents living in seperate households, why couldn't she have stayed in school? A lot of this does not make sense to me.

Answer 3

my advice is being engaged is great for now, maybe tell your parents your gonna wait to get married there is no rush you guys are so young and in relationships the first year is always the easiest.maybe showing them how mature you 2 are will help them. also plan to hang out, with mom one day and dad another time winning over one parent at a time.

Answer 4

Just go for it and if it meant to be, everything will work out on it's own. I met my husband when I was 18, and my parents HATED him. We got married when I was 20 and my grandmother did not show up. It really hurt me, but I knew he was my soulmate, and now we all get along. There are times that my parents and him don't see eye to eye, but eventually, every thing works out. Best of luck!

Answer 5

Your only 22. Why not live together for a while? You don't know anyone untill you live with them. Give it two years; if it works; give it two more! Don't worry about your parents. Of coarse they are worried. Two months on-line is nuts.