need help from anyone who isnt a teenager,parents please.. I am a 17 year old,was very clever but am falling in my grades. Should i be thinking of dating at this age? I get alot of attention from guys,how do i get away from this?What do i tell the guys,i dont want to be an attitude girl.
I want to be beauty with brains. Please advice it seems i wont get over 18 without dropping out of college. Please help!
2006-11-27 09:38:15 · 26 answers · asked by confused! 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
thank you all. I feel as though i can be a better person.Your opinions so far are lovely. Thanx
2006-11-27 09:52:47 · update #1
This is a good question, the kind that belongs on Yahoo! Answers.
Life needs balance. That means that if you do any one thing to extreme, you throw the balance of life off.
For instance, if your life includes school and homework, dating, family, church, sleeping, and shopping, you've got a good thing going on. But, if you start shopping (or just hanging out at the mall) too much, you run out of time to get your homework done which cuts into your family time, making your dates too short, not allowing you to be awake and ready for church, and making your school grades suffer. Same thing if you go out dating until three a.m. every night - your balance falls out of whack.
To make it work, you need to set a schedule. Study must be done from this time to that time. You have this much time for family time. You can spare this much to go shopping. He has to have you in from your date by this time...and then only on weekend nights.
Making the schedule up isn't hard - making the schedule work is very hard. It's tempting to hang with the girls for another hour, or spend a couple more hours kissing in the car, or watching TV with your folks, but your balance will be off.
Stand in front of the mirror - look yourself in the eyes - and promise to try out the schedule for 30 days. Let us know how it goes!
Good luck! - Stuart
2006-11-27 09:40:20 · answer #1 · answered by Stuart 7 · 1⤊ 4⤋
Good God, it's so true, youth is wasted on the young. What do you mean you were 'very clever'?? Is it that the coursework has become too hard? Why shouldn't you be dating ? You are not about to enter a convent, are you?? Of course you will get attention from guys - that's what they do when they like the way you look, it's perfectly normal. If the only way you can get through college and exams is to not go out and socialise then something is not right. Are you afraid of 'dating'? And why is it so important to be a 'beauty with brains'?? What is wrong with just being yourself??? Stop worrying so much!!! It's ok to go out with guys or girls - it's an important part of your growing up as much as getting good grades. You need to CONNECT with people- you can't do that if are always studying. I speak as a mother - 2 sons (12 & 15) and as a uni graduate who spent 3 years balancing degree work with part-time jobs and a social life fuelled by beer, pool and several charming and intimate relationships. I graduated, had several well-paid jobs, travelled and lived abroad and am currently enjoying being a full-time mum. So go ahead. stop fussing so much about being pretty and clever - be the very special woman that you are already and just SHINE.....
2006-11-27 10:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you just need to have a bit more going on in your life. I always had a very busy social life - but not really through school, through other organisations. It's good to get out at the weekend and the odd night out in the week. I always had Fridays off - no homework. You can date or just go out with your friends who may include boys!! Dating is a bit of a distraction but then this won't stop and ultimately you might want to settle down! Don't bother with the ones who don't understand that you will have to work sometimes or spend time in the library. If you have problems with your grades, look into extra tuition in the ones you're finding difficult or try approaching things from a different angle eg see the play rather than just read it in a book. Life is too short to spend it all studying - colleges want someone with a bit of life experience too. There are millions more distractions in the 'outside world'. Good luck.
2006-12-01 01:00:25 · answer #3 · answered by J_Dobbins 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can honestly say that dating boys really really affected my grades at school. Especially in my final exam year. I met a boy and fell madly in love. (or so I thought!) All I could think about was him and he moved a 3 hour drive away a few weeks before my exams which made it even worse. All I cared about was getting down to see him. I regret it so much now. We split up 6 months later. I would definitly advice not to get too involved until after your exams. You wont be an attitude girl. Just very sensible. When youve got your good grades, a good college place and a great career you have your whole life to fall in love. Good luck with everything. Keep up the hard work, Miss beauty and brains! x
2006-11-27 11:22:29 · answer #4 · answered by Teresa M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a sensible teenager who wants to get good grades. I commend you for this. However, at 17 you are old enough to date, and should have some social life as well. It's possible to combine the two, by setting aside time during the week to do your studies and homework. If you're having trouble with some subjects, talk to your teachers or school counselor. Maybe they have some tutoring sessions that can help. Then on weekends, it will be okay for you to date occasionally. I'm sure you can meet your goal of being a beauty with brains. Good luck!
2006-11-27 09:57:36 · answer #5 · answered by gldjns 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunatly you won't be able to get away from the attention of the guys.There is a difference between clever and intelligent.
It wouldn't hurt your grades to go out and have some fun with friends or a date as long as you don't let it interfere with your studies. You need to get out and relax,to forget about grades once in awhile. When I was in the Navy,I attended a school all day,pulled duty at night and weekends. It nearly drove me crazy because I had little time for myself to just relax.
Sorry I can't tell you how to tell the guys to leave you alone with out gettingan attitude label other than to tell the truth.
Hope someone can advise you better on that.
2006-11-27 09:54:17 · answer #6 · answered by Ralph T 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to focus on what is important for you in the future, and how you are going to achieve this in the now.
Sit down with a notepad and pen and write out:
What you want to achieve and by what date. What are the positive factors currently in your life. What are the factors that may be preventing you from achieving your goals. What are the extra things you may need to do to achieve the targets.
You say that you want to be a beauty with brains. That's cool. The work involved will not be cool; it will be hard. But this is what you want, right? You have to be determined and single minded. I'm sure you are flattered with all the attention you are currently getting from the boys, but believe me, they are just after your body. If you let your head be turned right now, you are going to pay heavily in the near future. Cut out everything which is a distraction.
Remember, you want the type of person in the future that you can admire now. You will be.
2006-11-27 09:56:53 · answer #7 · answered by 13caesars 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you want to devote your time to being a good student is going to help you.
Just turn down offers of dates. If others want to think of you as having an attitude, let them. You know the truth, and that is what is important.
I had a boyfriend before having some final exams, and I had to break off that relationship- it was too much to deal with all at once.
However, if the lads interested in you don't understand that you want to put your schoolwork first, chances are that they are the type of lads you don't want to be with anyway.
I wish you luck in your studies...you can be strong enough to get through this and pass your exams with flying colours :)
2006-11-28 11:35:09 · answer #8 · answered by ♥Pamela♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a fairly normal (if slightly more sensible than most) teenager to me. It's natural for you to be taking an interest in boys and them in you about now. As has already been said, balance is the key. Some time for school work, some time for socialising. If a guy's giving you unwanted attention just be polite and tell him it's not a good time for you to consider that kind of relationship but you're flattered that he asked.
Have faith in yourself, I have a feeling you're going to do just fine.
2006-11-27 22:11:18 · answer #9 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people your age are thinking of dating, but you are sensible to be putting your grades first, concentrate on getting them back up and then you can relax a little. You should just tell the guys that you are too busy at the moment to go out. But remember that if you put too much pressure on yourself to get good grades you may just cause more problems. Try your very best, but enjoy life too.
2006-11-27 09:49:39 · answer #10 · answered by gooder 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your life is how you want to live it. Being attractive is not a bad thing, but lets face it at this age you want to have some fun as well as study. Be smart most of the guy's wanting to date you want one thing. Study, go out with your friends let love take a back seat until you can give the time for something more meaningful.
2006-11-30 23:10:42 · answer #11 · answered by sinkcat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋