Should he receive a second chance???

Question

Me and my boyfriend been with each other for eight months and last night, he was suppose to visit me in the hospital, but never showed up and his attitude and the way he use to call me has changed to. He then started going out more, and I had the feeling he was cheating, but was unable to prove it. Today when speaking to him, he just started crying and told me the truth. That he cheated on me, but it was a "one time" thing with the girl and that he is sorry and wanted to work things out with me and make our relationship stronger. I haven't given him a real answer but a hypothically response, saying if we do then it would be a beginning process, starting as friends and working back into a relationship. Is that a good idea and should I give him a second chance???

Answer 1

never trust him again. NEVER.

Answer 2

Well the choice is yours

He must have felt guilty and cared for your enough to tell you or else he would have kept on doing behind your back.

Of course the trust is gone and the repect too probally. Only you can make the decsion that is right for your relationship but it is my opinion that if you really care and love this person taking a step back and talking about how you feel and why it happened might help. Sometimes we think the grass is greener on the other side and its NOT perhaps now he sees that we are not perfect and we all make mistakes. Working on your friendship is an excellent start the key to a great relationship is sex the key to a long lasting loving relationship is communication, trust and repect. Best of luck to you .

Answer 3

Eight months is a relatively short period of time to lose interest in a relationship. I am all for giving someone the benefit of doubt depending on the situation. Was drinking involved, was it a party, was she a stranger? If it was a random act, then it truly may have been a "mistake". If this was with an acquaintance or even friend, then there lies a bigger problem. Remember that you must do what feels best to you, as the relationship is in your hands. If you do, however, chose to "forgive and forget", then the key for it to be a successful relationship is to "forget". If you plan to use this as ammunition for every problem going forward, then just end the relationship now.

Answer 4

I would have serious doubts that it was a one time thing. If you had feelings for awhile that he was cheating on you, he probably did it more than once. The other girl probably didn't work out and he saw you as a backup. To his credit though, he did admit to it when he could have lived the lie forever. That means he has some conscience. Don't give him a chance to be your boyfriend again though. You can forgive him and be his friend for now. If it leads to more later, that's fine, but you'll probably find that the trust you had before is gone.

Answer 5

Hey

Well I've always lived by once a cheater always a cheater.But for some reason your guy is really wanting me to just throw that rule out the window.I believe him that it was a one time thing.That he is truely sorry.So I think in this case YES give him one more shot.Just make sure though you tell him that this is his only chance to do right because if he messes it up there's not going to be another one.I think your doing the right thing.It's a good idea.Saying lets go back to being friends and then work our way back into a relationship!

Well Good Luck and I hope you get to feeling better!

sponge_angel91

Answer 6

I honestly say ,he had his chance and he blew it ,you knew something was going on ,you could tell ,i always say go with gut feeling.How are you to tell that he lying again ,he lied to you once by going behide your back,now who is to tell he could have been with this girl several times and now its all over with her ,he`s came running back to you .
i am just being honest ,cheating on some one is a serious thing and i don`t care if he is crying or if he had drink or what ever ,there is never an excuse good enough !!
You don`t have to be nasty ,just say i am dissappointed in you and don`t need this at moment as i am in hospitial and need to take it easy ,and i do not want to be your girl friend ever ,you need to respect your self and ask the question ,how will you ever trust him again ,it will be hard and you will miss him but enjoy being on your own for a while and be with friends and family
You will meet some one specail one day and they will love and respect you and never hurt you or cheat on you ,cheating is for losers and i am sorry girl but you don`t want to hang around with losers ,you are much better than that ,chin up !
love who are ,don`t blame your self ,you are great ,hope you get better soon and please take care of you think of no one else and know you are more desserving than all of the stuff he has put you through ,move on and look forward to a brighter furture !!!Good luck babe x

Answer 7

Hi,

You can forgive him for being disloyal, dishonest, being a cheat, one who cannot be trusted, a guy that lets his - - - - do his thinking for him, and will do it again as soon as he is tempted and gets the chance,. . . .but. . . .you will never forget.

How about when the first child is born and you are in the hospital, . . . .where is he going to be?

Your guy is a weak, boy, not a man and you should consider if you want to continue a relationship with a boy. Have you checked his ID to see if he is even old enough to be dating? ???

Sorry, didn't mean to hurt you feelings, instead I meant to help you see the light.

Bottom line, you are running with a loser, . . . .dump him and find a real man, one who will love and appreciate you and will put you first, . . . .no matter what.

Darryl S.

Answer 8

Hell no.. damn girl i feel the same way right now about my boyfriend.. he has been changng on me and has been going out more and it hurts like a ************... i hate that he treats me diffrent to..i have no way in proving it but you know the feeling you get when you know something is wrong.. i hate that feeling..he did tell you the truth and im sure he is guilty of it..make him work for it...start back as friends and let him prove to you that he had changed.. i think he deseves that as least... but dont take him back right now.. because then you will feel like he is doing it again and it might just make you feel more mad and upset then you already are... give yourself time to get over what he did to you and tell him only time will tell...

Answer 9

Honestly 8 months isn't a long time. You can always do what I do eye for an eye but just don't tell him. Make him think he's the dog and he's the cheater. Then you can throw it in his face whenever he acts up. Once a cheater always a cheater! You gotta give it to him for telling the truth. I bet someone saw him that you know and he just wanted to tell you first. So if you decide to give him a second chance make him pay!

Answer 10

If u feel like u can trust him again try to go into a relationship slowly, just like u said. If he acts like he is sorry this might be worth a try. If u don't think u can trust him (follow ur gut) then say no. Whatever u do, make sure that he does not betray ur trust again. Like they say, if he cheats once its his fault, if he cheats twice it's your fault. :-) follow your your heart and best of luck I know this is a hard desicion to (i had to make a similar 1) Everything turned out ok for me, as I hope it will for u. And feel better soon.

Answer 11

Trust is trust, and must be earned. If he cheated just once, he has crossed the "its get easier" line. You were in the hospital and he cheated then, girl boot his butt out the door. There are a lot of dogs out there and a lot of good, loving, hard working people hoping to someone like you.