I just just came out of this relationship hurting really bad.I had to get real honest with myself here. What is my problem. The man hurt me to the core. I say to myself is he hurting the way I am. I think not. I reflect back and think about the pain I was in before the relationship ended. Well That part of man that a woman enjoys that part that gives her pleasure. Well Thats what I am going to miss. Thats all. sometime a woman feels as if the man she were in the relationship with is the only man on gods green earth that can make her feel good. Wrong, Wrong. That is how I feel. At times letting go could be real hard. But in reality it is real simple. All I had to do were think, think back on how bad this man made me feel. And most of the times not good. Its about getting real honest with myself. and move on. I feel that if a man cheat. hewill always be that way, even if the woman forgives him.
2006-11-27 08:54:37 · 17 answers · asked by Diamond 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think the grieving is for what might have been or what could have been or what should have been...ideals - not reality. Reality is he hurts you and that is not love. Reality is he is a cheater. That has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. I think we believe we deserve no more than that or that we hold onto our ideals so strongly, that we can deny or rationalize any "less than" behavior. Reality is we are deserving of much much more than what he has shown you. Reality is that you will have less laundry to do. Reality is that it is going to be the most painful taking care of yourself and finding out who and what you are so that you can be happy with yourself and not depending on "so much more than less than" to complete our lives. If the only thing you can do right now is stay in reality - not candy coating one thing this man has done and then taking responsibility for yourself (he probably didn't take anything you weren't willing to give or put up with) you will be walking toward the sun my sister.
2006-11-27 09:05:39 · answer #1 · answered by healy6099 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I read an article that said when you're in love, your body develops a chemical addiction to that person. It's like being hooked on something and when it's taken away, your body has to go through withdrawl to get it out of your system. It's natural to hurt, just give yourself some time. Imagine the love of your life dying after nine years. Life is too short to spend it with someone who doesn't appreciate you. Once you realize you deserve better, you'll be able to move on and not look back. Good luck.
2006-11-27 08:59:52 · answer #2 · answered by lovelee1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, how old are you? Seven! You keep answering your own questions. First of all no one can make you feel anything unless you give them permission. I was once in the same predicament, I was cheated on, beat on and treated like Sh--t, and through the whole nine years that this abuse went on I swore up and down that I loved this man. But do you know what it took for me to get it together? It took him telling me that the only reason he got away with the things he did to me, was because I let him. Grow up and take control of your life, and don't give that control to anyone ever again. It' almost as important as your virginity...but not quite!
2006-11-27 09:07:11 · answer #3 · answered by Robbin W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's because men are the less emotional sex (generally speaking) and when the relationship is over they rationalize it and just say 'its done i have to move on' (again generally speaking). Although I think internally men can hurt just as bad, I think their final form of power over us as women is to make us feel like we're crazy or wrong for feeling so emotional. I'm very sorry that this has happened to you, but i'm very sure that you will find someone that you can be a companion for you, and love you, and maybe this guy you were with just wasn't the one meant for you. You have a choice for complete and utter happiness - take it!! Spread your wings girl!!
2006-11-27 08:58:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it hurts because you miss how it felt when you were in that relationship. You can have someone that's much better. Think about what you deserve in a man and with that try to get over the pain . It is my belief that we don't know what we deserve out of something until it has been denied from us. Someone can give you what he didn't. There is always something better.
2006-11-27 09:02:18 · answer #5 · answered by Avangelis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First why do women get obsessed if a man hurts equal or more? if you are done get on with it, think bout the times he treated you like crap, take a few weeks off go get drunk get laid and move on if you show the man you are hurting it will make him feel good, but then again who cares, the right ones come by you just need to grab their attention.
2006-11-27 08:58:57 · answer #6 · answered by wolfchat_2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems you have really learned something good from something bad...GOOD FOR YOU!! You will find it easier to move on from no good relationships in the future. This is a golden asset to have and believe it or not ...NOT many women have it. You do and so do I so cheers to you. The pain was worth the lesson...believe me.
2006-11-27 08:57:58 · answer #7 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men are dumb and immature like that. Move on and forget about it. In time you will finally realize yourself and feel that you are wrong. However, you can learn from your mistakes and fix yourself. Don't get yourself in trapped in something like this and get yourself in the same thing again. Men once they cheat, it's not likely that they won't do it again.
2006-11-27 08:57:25 · answer #8 · answered by leazngurl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
all you want is the happiness back . the happiness he gave you. but it will never be like it was. you can never get that time back. There are seasons for everything. the season for him is over. A new one has begun
2006-11-27 09:05:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely right. You did allot of thinking here, and I am proud of your findings. You are going to be OK now. Blessed be......... :)
2006-11-27 08:57:49 · answer #10 · answered by shy&gental 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋