For love or money? How valuable is security in your relationships?

Question

Would you continue to date somebody if you knew that if you got married you would struggle financially all your life? How valuable is security to you? Some experts (including eHarmony's creator) say to not settle for less than what your ideal dating (and eventual marriage) partner is. How long/how much sacrifice are you willing to make for the perfect man/woman? What if the person you are seeing had all but one quality (like not a lot of money)? Could you still be happy?

Answer 1

Ever since prehistoric times, going back millions of years, women has had to look for men displaying "good provider" qualities. In our day that is manifested in money and status. And all women look for it, whether they know it or not. It is in their genetic code. For men it is a matter of finding the mate with the best potential for procreation.

Answer 2

I always felt that I just wanted someone smart. We both earn fairly desent incomes, and we still struggle with things though. Its not even like we have outrageous bills or anything, but I barely make it myself. I do think that security, and personal security is even more important. If I ever needed to leave, I can tell you I would have a hard time getting all of my own bills paid each month. So I do see what you are saying. I think that it matters most that you are happy, but I think being personally secure with your means is right up there as an equal in my book.

Answer 3

Love, definitely. You need to work and provide for yourselves, but when you can love the other person, it makes it not matter when you can't afford $1M houses and $150K cars. If all that matters is being able to go out and spend money, then the lack of companionship won't matter. But if you want someone who's going to make sure you're tucked into bed and bring you soup when you're sick, or sit on the couch and watch a crackling fire with you, or spend an evening sitting around a table with friends enjoying each other's company, then love plays a far bigger part of it than any paycheck.

Answer 4

Actually this question has 2 points of view:
1. A view from a man to woman
2. A view from a woman to man

If you see it from eye of a man to a woman; better to say that generally women have dependency on men's wallet. And it's natural. Due to nature that women must have security from men regarding financial matters. But it does not mean that a woman think or put her way only to money or take advantage of it.

But every one have to be careful about his/her money towards him/her date or marriage. Every one should stand on his feet, regardless on male or female.

Answer 5

Honestly? No. My parents struggled because of money and they ended up divorced and unhappy. I would like to say love is enough, but it's not. I don't want to live paycheck to paycheck and barely scrape by. I want to at least be comfortable and able to take on the challenges life throws my way. I don't think people should get married if they can't afford their life.

Answer 6

The second time, security was in the TOP 3. If you like taking care of your man, marry him...otherwise...move on.

My Grandmother always said its just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor one....

My current security makes me LOVE HIM MORE!!!!!!!! No fear!!

Answer 7

As a successful guy I never understood women who marry losers and end up in living h...

Answer 8

no marriage in my book, My life is dedicated to pleasuring men of all nature

Answer 9

love doesnt pay the bills (unfortunatly)

Answer 10

money is important today.