2006-11-27 07:48:57 · 16 answers · asked by Brenda a 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If her mom or dad can prove they are having "relations" they can call the police... A 16 y/o girl is not going to listen to reason from an adult if you try and talk to her about it.
2006-11-27 07:51:40 · answer #1 · answered by slim27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't get your niece to do anything. At the age of 16, even though she is not mature, she thinks she it. She needs to learn that her choices have consequences. The more people try to convince her to stop seeing him, the more she is going to want to continue. It's the nature of the beast. Just talk to her about being careful (sexually) and to make sure that she uses condoms with him all the time. Pardon the assumption and I don't mean to offend but I highly doubt a 22 year old is dating a 16 year old that isn't "putting out".
Calling the cops on him, once you find out the age of consent in your state, is a good idea. But it is the parents' job to do that.
You need to be there as a sounding board. Especially if calling the cops on him backfires and makes her want to see him more. You can explain to her (pretend you are speaking to another adult - she will respond to that) that you know it doesn't seem fair, that it seems like everyone is against her, and that you realize she is a very smart young lady - but whether she believes it or not, people are just trying to protect her. You can be understanding and not accept the situation. The less judged and "bossed around" she feels by you the more willing she is to open up. And the more willing she is to open up the more willing she will be to listen to you as long as your advice isn't judgemental or heavy handed.
Everyone should also get together and try to figure out why she did this. What is it that she is missing in her life or what hole is she trying to fill by dating a guy that much older than her. Does she get enough loving supportive male attention? Did anything happen to her that draws her to older men? There is a source for this behavior and once you figure that out you can deal with the source and not just try to put out fires.
Hope everything works out okay!
2006-11-27 16:13:04 · answer #2 · answered by T&M's Mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have been there. when i was 16 and stupid i dated a 22 year old. I think i did it just to piss people off at first then i really started to like him. it was hard but i we ended things because the age differece was so hard. Why not just go to the 22 year old and threaten him with the cops. I think thats what my dad did to make him not want to see me any more. good luck and its just a phase i got through it and she will too.
2006-11-27 15:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by littleluvkitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her, see where her head is at. Explain the pros and cons of being with an older boy. He is not a man. A man will not date a girl that will put him on the sex offenders roster. If he still likes her when she is 18, tell him to come back then. or
Get a very large bat and keep it by the front door where she can see it. And a restraining order for the 22yr old. If not be prepared to babysit.
2006-11-27 16:32:27 · answer #4 · answered by cocobonnbonn00 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can do sabotage:
1. Convince her that he is gay
2. Get evidence that he is cheating on her
or my fav, 3:
Introduce her to someone new, someone very good looking and someone she would be interested in.
Hopefully it works, most of the time it does. I think if she met someone new that was her type AND around her age she might go for it, at least she would gain interest in the guy. Then her interest for this 22 year old fellow might fade.
2006-11-27 15:59:00 · answer #5 · answered by Dreamer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm... good question. Considering he's so much older that her, what motives would he have for dating her? Sounds fishy to me like he has bad motives. I would try warning her parents about it and talking with your niece, although she may not want to hear it, and if all else fails, call the cops.
2006-11-27 16:07:41 · answer #6 · answered by frodobaggins115 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If her parents don't have an issue with it and you're not her legal guardian - nothing. Otherwise, encourage the parents or guardians to call the police. Depending on your state laws, they may discourage them being together but unless they're having sex, they can't really do anything. Maybe it would scare him off though? Good luck with it.
2006-11-27 15:53:07 · answer #7 · answered by Ashley B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all where do you live. Find out what the age of consent is if its 16 you cant do much about it, if its 18 send him to jail.
2006-11-27 15:53:22 · answer #8 · answered by Mahogany 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the police
2006-11-27 15:59:42 · answer #9 · answered by mommy_2_liam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk with your niece...let her know what your concerns are..Talk with the boy friend..it couldn't hurt..But i do know that is the rebel-yon stage..so be care-full...What dose the parents..think of this..??By you not being the parent...all you can do is talk with both of them..at separate times..hope i helped you..
2006-11-27 16:01:25 · answer #10 · answered by iamhappy2us 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋