i made my decsion but whats your opinion on baby before marriage?

Question

just curious thats all just a social question thank you your answers r greatly appreciated!

ok people this question is not about me people!!!! me and my fiance have concived this baby out of love!!!!! not anything else and it was planned!!!!

its just a social question people thats all just want to see other peoples views on life!!!

Answer 1

Not a big deal me and my boyfriend have a little girl and one more on the way. Our wedding date is set for May of next year. We love each other and know we're spending our life together, but we made a few different decisions then other people might suggest is "right"- BUT come on it's 2006 .. it's no biggy :)

Answer 2

I have two children and one on the way. All my children were unplanned and conceived before marriage. My boyfriend and I are planning on getting married before the third is born. Ideally, I think two people should be married before having children but it doesn't always happen that way. I was 17 when I first got pregnant so needless to say no one was happy about it. With my second, I was in an abusive relationship and trying to get out... so no one was overly thrilled about that pregnancy either. I swore that the next time I got pregnant, I would be married and financially stable so that I could have people be happy and excited. Well, like they say birth control isn't 100% effective and I'm pregnant again. This time however my boyfriend and I are financially stable and have been dating for quite some time and plan on getting married. We've only told a few people since I'm only 5 weeks and so far everyone is happy. Well, hope this helps.

Answer 3

I think the whole concept of having children after your married is great.....but.... just because you get married, doesn't mean your children will have a better life. It doesn't mean your family will be happy, or there won't be divorce, abuse, cheating, indifferences that cannot be fixed. There are not guarantees anymore, unfortunately that includes marriage nowadays. I believe a child needs a mother and a father....with or without the marriage being present. Just because two people may be married, doesn't mean both parents are involved. I have seen that a lot. If you love each other, and more importantly you both love that child, i don't see the problem. If you can't be commited to each other forever, just make sure you are both commited to your child. And if you split up, remain cordial to the other. Your child will learn from that, and it will make it sooo much easier for him/her to adjust.
Things change. Social "norms" change, like it or not. But loving the children you bring in to this world shouldn't.

Answer 4

My opinion is that just because a person marries you does not mean they are honestly committed to you. People "change" their minds all the time.
I know people who are not married but are committed to each other, and the exact opposite, married with no real committement, just did it.
For me a marriage certificate and a wedding ring do not make a commitment, the people in the relationship do.
So if the two of you care for each other and are willing and able to care for your child, what difference will a ceremony make?
I have been married for almost 10 years ( 3 kids: 8, 6 and 5)

Answer 5

Well, my thoughts are that two people (unless they choose to be surrogates or sperm donors) have to have a commitement to each other first before making a commitement to a child. I think it makes life easier as a parent and as a child.

If two people have decided that they don't want to get married, then don't. Just make sure that you have that commitement before you start TTC.

I know of two people who met and fell in love when they were 36 and 37....after being together for a year they knew they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together and started planning a Vegas wedding....but started TTC right away and before getting married because they felt like their time to have kids was limited at their age. I saw nothing wrong with it. The commitement was there, and three years later they are married and have a beautiful little girl!

Answer 6

As long as you are financially and emotionally stable and prepared I don't see the problem. Marriage doesn't guarantee successful child-rearing in the least. Plenty of married women don't receive any assistance from their spouses when it comes to the children. Having a good partner is a plus but isn't absolutely necessary for a good outcome. As long as you are able and willing to provide a loving, nurturing environment to the child then I doubt theres much to worry about.

Answer 7

we live in a different world today then we did 50 years ago there are alot of people having babies before they are married. Thats why some states you don't have to be tested for aids before you get married.

Answer 8

I don't think it is the BEST idea, but many couples had babies before they got married and they turned out fine. I waited until we had been married for a few years.... the divorce rates are so high, I wanted to get through the honeymoon period and make sure our marriage was good and stable before we brought a child into the world.

Answer 9

It is fine. Marriage is over rated. To me nothing in the relationship changes (unless you let it) except your name. Regardless if you are married or not, the love and commitment you have to eachother should remain just as positive and strong and only grow with you.

Marriage is a piece of paper, Love in your heart is a BOND and children only make it stronger!

Answer 10

I think any sex or sexual behavior outside of marriage is wrong but bringing a child into it is worse. Of course if somebody is already pregnant I think the best thing to do is give the baby up for adoption. I would never suggest abortion just because parents aren't married. But if you can't commit to each other enough to get married (not just plan to get married but actually do it) then how are you going to raise a child together?