Help help help...?

Question

well, ok, basically.. there this guy and he is 24 years old and i told him i'm 16 because every one says i look abvout 19.. but thats only on webcam.. and i only know him over the net and don't u dare say anything about meeting people off the net! because i met him from one of my mates sisters who knows him.. so i know he's not a perv lol but the thing is im actually 13 (14 in may) and i swore to myself i would tell him before we started getting to close.. but you may say i've got many years left in my life to find a decent boyfriend but there's always one special person in your life and its him!
but nehoo.. he asked me out and i said yeh and wants to meet me but then he'll see i'm really 13 and i know i HAVE to tell him or just refuse to meet him but i cant...
ahhhhh
just tell me what you think is the best thing to do... but when we're older it won't seem as bad.. my mum n dad are 11 years apart but in a few years.. he wouldda found someone else and wont wait for me
i love him..

Answer 1

i'm not gonna tell you meeting people on the net is bad, cuz my aunt and uncle met online and they've been together for 5 years so far. the age gap is a little iffy tho. he's almost 10 years older than you. you really need to tell him the truth. if he REALLY likes you back than he'll wait for you. but if you get with him and the wrong person finds out his life could be over. he could get thrown in jail for statutory rape or something. if he finds out how old you really are and doesn't like that fact and leaves with no goodbye or anything, it means it was never meant to be. you're too young to be saying he's the one. it just sounds like young infatuation to me. you'll grow up to be a wonderful woman some day and you'll go through many boyfriends who are the one at the time. maybe this guy is the one, but you may be his age before he figures it out. my advice is to keep looking for guys your age for now. then in the future (when your're 18) look this guy up again. if he's taken or married then it wasn't meant to be, but if he's single or just casually dating then maybe it was meant to be.

Answer 2

If you are only 13, then confusing a man of 24 into believing that you are older than you really are is actually leading him into an illegal situation. No matter how grown up you may feel or even look, it is illegal for this man to "date" you. I don't know where you are based but if it is the UK, it is quite dangerous for him to be lead down that path and could even go to jail.
If you truly like this man or as you say, love him, then for his sake, do not associate him on an intimate level.
Find someone your own age or wait until you are old enough to relate to someone on a more level footing.
Please.
Also, an 11 year age gap is nothing when you're looking at 2 people who are, say, 32 and 43 but it is a completely different kettle of fish when you're looking at 13 and 24.
I know it's hard but you must do the right thing or the situation will definitely end ugly.

Answer 3

You claim you 'really love him'-well if you really do,why are you being so selfish and thoughtless? You are a minor,and if he gets caught with you he could end up with a criminal record for statutory rape! Is that what you want for him? And you claim to love him-but you are LYING to him! Doesn't sound like you have an ounce of respect for him. You are way too young for this-don't try to grow up too fast. Be honest with him. If this is the special person in your life,then you 2 will be reunited when you are at a more proper age. But odds are that this is just a crush. For your sake-for his sake-BE HONEST.

Answer 4

i can understand you having a crush on the older guy!!!
but you should really be carefull as when you do start to date him he might want to do the things older girls do!!! and then you could get into bother, it is really a big age gap at the moment and you are right in ten years time it wont seem that much.
he also could get into real bother with the law as you are only young so there is a good chance he will not want you once he finds out your age!! sorry but you should be honest with him he has the right to know x good luck

Answer 5

Okay, you have to tell this guy how old you are. A 24 year old should not be seeing a 13 year old! Imagine the compromising and difficult position you could be putting this guy in!

Answer 6

Excuse Me , what do you know about love? your 13 you are so much in a hurry to do what will come naturally if you just let it. When you feel like this now imagine what the real thing will feel like when your old enough to handle it. At 13 you have the whole world in front of you and so much things to experience why are you rushing to grow up, it ain't going nowhere. as my 14yr old daughter would say hush your gums and seckle

Answer 7

I sympathise but unfortunately u could get this guy into real trouble. U need to tell him imediately. If this developed he could be put on a sex offenders register that will stay on there for the rest of his life. If u care about him let him go.

Good luck

Answer 8

You've gotta tell the guy now, before you meet him, so he has a chance to make up his own mind. If he's OK with the age thing, then fine (I am trying real hard not to preach to you about being so young though!!)

Answer 9

Just two things for you to think about. Any relationship that isn't built on a foundation of truth and honesty is doomed to fail. Second, if you really care about him you should realize that a relationship with you could lead to prison for him.

Answer 10

You should tread very carefully. He'll be ready for a lot more than you, besides; you're what they call 'jail bait'. You must tell him your real age, before you meet, then let him decide. If you do get together it mustn't be based on a lie, and do take it slowly.