What would you do.? Need some serious answers only.?

Question

I have a sister that is not the best mother in the world, she has been in and out of phsych wards, detox for prescription abuse. She has been diagnosed bi-polar. Here is the thing she has three small children under the age of 6; which I know she loves her kids but I just don't think that she or her husband are fit enough to take care of them. At the moment they are loosing there house, the children don't have beds and are in desperate need of dental work. I woudl not want to report them because I am mean, and I know my sister would be devastated I know she is going through rough times. However, I am overly worried about my nephews. What is there that I can do to help these children out. Is there programs that will help the kids without getting them taken away.

Please respond with sincere answere


Thanks everyone; and overly concerned aunt!

I know there have been a lot of suggestions if I am capable of taking the children, unfortuanately I am unable to do that being a single mother of one barely making it. It would be very difficult for me to handle four and one of her children having down sydrome. It would be a great thought. I am taking them on the weekends as much as I can.

Answer 1

My dad is bipolar, and when we were growing up my brothers and I went through some hellacious times. Thank god my mom was stable enough to shield us from a lot of the worst of my father's mood swings, but there were still some horrific times.

Your sister's kids need some oasis of calm and stability in their lives. If you or any other relative can find it in your hearts to take these kids in, even for a short time, you would be providing more relief than you probably ever know.

I would suggest that you make an appointment to go see a counselor or therapist who has some experience dealing with bipolar patients, and ask him/her how you can best help. I'm sure you're going to get some good answers here, but I think that for the sake of the kids you need to "cut to the chase" and go find a professional who can tell you exactly what resources are available to you, and help you to size up the situation so you can do the best you can by both your sister and her kids.

I don't know what kind of intervention programs are available for the kids; it's possible that a counselor can help you to structure something like a temporary guardianship or fostercare situation where you take over the kids' care and receive some financial assistance for doing so, but this is an area where you need real professional guidance. Ergo go see a counselor or therapist.

If you have a community mental health center or a munical mental health department, they may be able to give you a referral to someone. Your own doctor or health care group may also be able to provide a referral. NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, may also be able to assist you. This is the URL for the national organization: http://www.nami.org/ You can get a referral to a local chapter, which will be more cognizant of the specific resources in your area.

You are to be commended for your concern for your sister's children. They need help and a safe haven while your sister deals with her own problems. Good luck and bless you.

Answer 2

Can you or somebody in your family arrange for temporary guardianship of these children? That would be the ideal solution. At this time, the safety of the children is more important than your sister's "devastation." The children should not be without the supervision of a reliable adult at these tender ages. If that won't work, try to arrange for day care, and have a member of the family stay there at night with your sister and brother-in-law. As a last resort, call the authorities; it could be a life-saving measure for these children.
If they need "stuff", such as beds, clothes and toys, try your local Freecycle chapter. You can find it at: www.Freecycle.org. Freecyclers give things away to keep them out of the landfills. You often find clothes and things for young children, as they tend to outgrow clothes before they wear them out. A food pantry can help with nourishing meals. Also, try your local Salvation Army. By using these resources, the family can use their limited funds to pay rent or mortgage.
The best thing your family members can have is a loving presence like yours in their lives! I will keep your family in my prayers, and pray for the strength and courage that you will need to continue to help them.

Answer 3

Why don't u talk to ur sister and see if u can take the kids and care for them for a while. Until she and her husband get on their feet. That is the only way I can think of that will prevent the children from being removed.

Answer 4

Hi i'm sorry for your dillema.I know how hard thing's must seem but don;t give up.Could you take care of them or any other family member help?Some Program's might report them so be careful,Pray don't give up these kid's will always remember and love you. I was thinking could they go for counselling don;t know there problems but try new and different things.Vic

Answer 5

Well its really none of your business unless the kids are in immediate danger. I could see you stepping in if gun slinging drug dealers were a regular thing at their house. Eventually the authorities will catch wind if it gets bad enough. Try to be the best aunt that you can to them but if you call the cops on them prematurely you may regret it.Pray.

Answer 6

get them to any thrift store they can help with furniture its free if you explain the situation. be careful who you call if you dont want them taken away. medical is based on income there is no reason for them to need dental work. please talk to your sister she can give you authority to "speak" on her behalf so YOU can go to the local welfare office and get them medical and foodstamps etc. im praying for you and your sister good luck shes VERY lucky to have you