I cannot make any friends.....How to make good friends?

Question

I am a student,I have a little shy personality.

I am not good at talking to someone else.

I just can ask them some public affairs,I cannot

really chatting wuth them,if I do so,sometimes they

may feel I am bothering them.This really makes

me unhappy.....and that's why I cannot make any
friends.....

Can anyone tell me how to improve this situation?

I really want to merge with them.

Or could anyone give me some useful advices
.
I would like to know how to make good friends.

Answer 1

The old adage is that to have a friend you must be a friend. This of course, echos the Golden Rule: "Do to others as you would have done to you."

So what do you want from a friend? Be that person. You want someone who takes an interest in what you are saying? Take an interest in what other people say. You want someone to listen to you? Ask question so they will talk (answer) and you can listen to them.

This is actually easier for shy people because you'll find a lot of people actually want to talk about themselves. So if you ask a couple leading or open-ended questions that gives them the opening to talk, all you have to do it listen. And they will be happy to have someone who will listen.

Avoid questions that can be answered with a "yes" or "no". They don't advance a conversation. Example, "Are you going to the cafeteria after class?" If they answer no, the conversation's done. If they answer yes, it may look like you're just trying to weasel and invitation to come along and that comes across as needy, or like you are "bothering them."

Something else you might try is getting involved in a campus club of some sort. I have a really good friend who was very shy when we met, but he decided to join the drama club. He never auditioned for any of our plays, but he always volunteered to do the backstage stuff: running errands, sweeping floors, helping the tech crew. Even though he was shy, we all slowly got to know him just because we spent time together. So if there is a club that you're interested in, join it and be helpful. It will help you in turn.

Answer 2

When someone says something to you, pick something that they said and ask them a question about it. People love to talk about themselves and they will like you if you allow them to talk about the things they enjoy.

For example, the person says "I was gardening today"

Don't just say "Great. " say "Do you enjoy gardening / How big is your garden / Have you got a patio?" Ask anything.

If there is a silence in the conversation then ask "Are you going on any vacations this year?" "Would you like to travel after college?"

Ask them anything, and they will ask you in turn. That will build a rapport and you will get to know them.

Answer 3

1st don't try to be like other people to get their attention, just be yourself.

find something in common and talk about it.

maybe you can join an activity that you like and there you can find people who share stuff with you. the activity could be anything (sports, book club, a band, ....etc). just choose what you like.

don't put in mind that you must be friends with this certain group of people because they're cool or whatever. just find people of your kind whatever that is.

don't tell others, "i want to be friends with you", they'll feel you're putting pressure on them.

Answer 4

Easy just help them in everything they need and just talk politely.
Help them in many things and there U'll have friends.

Answer 5

just be yourself and be haappy. everything pleasant will follow.