i guess i really just want to know the best way to deal with my depression???

Question

well ive been depressed for probably about 2 1/2 years...ive been to a therapist but i quit going b/c i feel very weird talking to people about my depression but it feels like everyday it gets worse and im scared that eventually i will become VERY sucidal. ive tried to talk to my mom but it seems like she doesnt care like she REALLY does NOT care at ALL!!! i just dont know what to do....and im very very scared b/c im not comfortable with the thought of telling any of my friends....ive told my best friend(also the guy i like) that ive been to a therapist for depression but i wasnt very serious about b/c i dont want him to just leave me b/c ive really opened up to one of my friends in the past about it but she quit talking to me right after...probably b/c she didnt want to deal w/ it......anyway im just very scared right now and i really need some help but sometimes i just wanna give up and kill myself.....PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME BEFORE I HELP MYSELF

Answer 1

"GET OUT OF BED:

One of the most important things you can do is get up at about the same time every morning (even week-ends). Preferably, that means about 7 a.m. or earlier. You might not feel like it but Get Up. Such regularity helps your body function more normally so you're more likely to feel normal.

LIGHTS:

Light helps your body function better. So turn on a lot of lights as soon as you arise. Open curtains to get more sunlight. Better yet, go outdoors into the sunshine as soon as you can. Remove any eyewear so light will enter more readily (glass cuts out some of the sun's rays). But don't stare at the sun, of course.

MOVE:

Be active right away -- oxygenate! That means getting up and walking around your dwelling for five or 10 minutes, or perhaps riding an exercycle. Mild exercise gets the blood flowing and transports more oxygen throughout your body (especially to your brain), helping you feel mentally alert and alive.

MUSIC:

Select and play some energetic, happy music as you dress and have your breakfast. The audiovisual department of most libraries has albums and tapes you can check out.


BREAKFAST:

Begin your breakfast with protein (i.e., meat, eggs, peanut butter, nuts, cheese). When you get up, your body chemistry is ready to convert food, especially protein,into longlasting energy. To balance your most important meal of the day, add an orange or other fresh fruit and whole grain cereal or whole grain bread.

TALK WITH SOMEONE:

One of the quickest ways to beat the blues is to interact with others. You might not feel like doing that - you'd rather avoid people when blue. So make lt easier on yourself. Talk with someone you enjoy about a subject you enjoy so there is definite give and take.

And, force yourself to say "hello" to the persons next to you in class, those where you live, anyone around.

LIMIT CAFFEINE:

The long-term (four hours or so) effects of caffeine are depression. Try to limit coffee to no more than one cup in the morning. Coffee can make you more alert for an hour or so, but later you get an opposite reaction. Caffeine tends to increase the release of insulin in the blood, and insulin lowers the blood sugar level. When you have low blood sugar levels, you begin to feel less sure of yourself, and have low energy levels, which can lead to the blues or depression.

LIMIT SUGAR:

Sugar might give you an initial rush of energy, but within an hour or so the blood sugar level can become low, and when it's low you may feel low, too.

The caffeine/sugar cycle. It's easy to get caught in the caffeine and sugar cycle -- having coffee, caffeinated soft drinks, or something with sugar every two hours or so to "stay up." For example, cola contains about 10 teaspoons of sugar plus caffeine equal to about half a cup of coffee. In addition to bringing on the blues, this cycle can result in dependence, poor nutrition. and obesity -- reasons to get down on yourself even more and feel blue.

MAINTAIN FIBER:

Fiber helps food go through your digestive system at a proper rate, giving a more constant energy supply. Highly processed foods merely provide a quick surge of energy which can be followed by depression. You can maintain fiber in your diet by eating an orange or grapefruit rather than just drinking the juice. Eat fresh vegetables, fresh fruits, and whole grain breads and cereals.

STRESS B COMPLEX:

Some persons report receiving help by taking a concentrated vitamin B complex. You'll find these called something like "Stress B" or "B 50." This is controversial.
Some nutritionists say, "Yes, this really should be considered," and others say, "No, this is not a good Idea." You can try some and decide whether or not it helps you. If it does help, then perhaps you should consult a nutritionist to see if there are other ways you can augment your diet.

ROUTINES:

Changing your routines is another way to help shake the blues. Choose a different combination of clothes to wear, walk rather than drive, take a different route, eat at a different place. Do something different to help break the routine.

It's hard. Getting up in the morning, turning on the lights, eating a nutritious breakfast, keeping busy--keeping such a schedule is not always easy.

You might need help for the first few days, someone to help you form good habits, get you out of bed. turn on the lights, make sure you have a good breakfast, someone to help you be more active. One good way is to make a contract with a friend or friends who want to see you change. It might seem embarrassing, but
those friends want to see you healthy and happy rather than depressed and difficult to be around. Note: If you feel that you need the help of someone for more than three or four days, you probably should make an appointment with a counselor or psychotherapist. You don't want to wear out your friends!

DEVELOP SUPPORTS:

Good old-fashioned support works wonders. Most of us have not developed "support systems." We need to think about that idea ahead of time, if we have the tendency to feel blue, so that the supports can be available when needed. Plan ahead by filling out the last section of this publication and keep it handy. In addition to developing your own resources, you might know of some community support groups for persons with the blues. Call the local mental health center to see if there are some groups you might be a part of. Some places to call for leads at K-State will be listed at the end of this brochure.

What do I do when I feel myself coming down with the blues?

Recognize the change in yourself when you are "coming down" with an emotional slump. Don't deny it or feel guilty. Rather, take charge of yourself right away.

Perhaps taking a day off and doing some favorite things will restore you. Get more exercise: walk, garden, cycle, swim. You might not feel like it, but exercise is one of the best depression breakers and preventers.

PRETEND:

Put a smile on your face and pretend that you are happy. Stand straight rather than falling into that slouching, depressed posture. Sound hokey? Well, it isn't. Research demonstrates that forming a facial expression actually changes how you feel inside. And pretending to feel an emotion results in actually feeling it. Frowners feel sadder. And the depressing effects last for hours. So smile: at yourself and others, even trees or dogs or cats. Sure, it's tough to smile when you're feeling blue. The extra effort you muster to do it will help you break the blues.

Wear bright, happy clothes and pretend you are happy. You will then find yourself happy. Maybe, even wear a goofy shirt or blouse or cap so you can see others smile with you. Dressing cheerfully and pretending can beat the blues.

SEEK OUT HUMOR:

See a funny movie, read a humorous book, or listen to a comedy tape/CD. When you see a really funny cartoon, make a copy and save it. Consciously decide to use and employ these things when you find yourself coming down with the blues. Singing can help -- make yourself do it.

EXERCISE:

It's worth stating again: Exercise is a great way to break depression. Walk, go to the Rec Center and ride an exercycle, swim, or climb stairs if it's too cold or hot outside.

Do not give in to those inner blues that say, "I don't feel like it."
Doing almost anything constructive will be beneficial."

Answer 2

Could tell you what I do, but it's different than what you ought to do, and might not work for you so. Just want you to know I'm sorry to hear all this and hope you will please focus your attention away from finding someone to tell it all or any of it to, away from the idea you will probably lose your close friends and loved ones, and just be honest with yourself. Honesty will not suggest anything drastic, but will provide insight. You can fix anything, for real, and if it can't be "fixed," it can be handled and managed, so don't freak out if it cannot be all perfect and fair. Life is not presented to us in a perfect package and we have to live with what we do or do not do or give. There are scarier things than not knowing what lies ahead. Just live and try not to focus so much on what you do not have that you want now or once needed. Start reaching out and give of yourself to people who don't know you and then you won't notice as much that you might sometimes still want from someone who should want to give to you. You'll be busy thinking what you can do next for someone else. Not saying you will not have pain and worries, just saying you will be giving away the care you want and maybe someday some will come back to you, but not if you expect it or demand it.

Or try a doctor again and get the pill or whatnot, but try all other things first, changes from within and without....

Answer 3

I really wish I could help you, but I don't know if anything I offer will make you feel better. It's times like this where you find out who your true friends are, and I think that if you think he can handle it, try talking to your best friend about it. Try not to "punish" him for another so-called friend's behavior. It's a lot for anyone to handle, but if I knew my best friend had those feelings, I know I'd try and be there for her like I'd hope she'd be there for me.

Yes, talking to therapists is very difficult. I know it. I'm currently experiencing it, and it's the toughest thing in the world for me right now, trying to express my feelings to someone that just isn't getting it. But I think the key is to find the right therapist. And if it helps, try keeping a journal of everything you feel, every single thought that bothers you, and hand it to the therapist to read. Write without restaint, without inhibition. And maybe, with time, you'll find it a little bit easier to talk out loud about your feelings. It's what I tried with my therapist, and it helped me to start opening up more to him.

Also, show your mother how serious you are about this. Maybe even show her what you've written here. Let her know that you are thinking about ending your life. Tell her you need her help. Make an appointment with your doctor and start the ball rolling, show her that you are life-and-death serious. Maybe once she sees you really reaching out, she might get the hint. Her behavior just doesn't seem fair and I'm sorry she's doing that to you.

I'm sorry you're going through this, but I hope you come out on the positive end of all this. Good luck and best wishes.

Answer 4

Honey listen to me....you need to find an outlet somehow. Bottleing up only makes it worse. Ive been there believe me. If you don't you will end up as you say help yourself out to a permanent hell. I have a form of Bipolar disorder but instead of getting depressed i get severly pissed off. Its hard for anyone to deal with me but those who love seem to try very hard. i can't always explain why im mad or what has made me this way....no i don't take pills or any other drug. I have found an outlet to where if i get into one of those situations i can calm down and you need to find one that will let you express yourself weather it be writing, playing music, talking or even answering questions on here. I don't care what it is as long as you don't kill yourself. There are others out there just like you...your not alone.

Answer 5

The key to solving all problems is to find the root cause. Once found, there are three basic ways to deal with it:
- Remove
- Improve
- Behoove.

Remove: If the problem can be removed - do it. Material things can usually be removed.

Improve - This covers most things like situations or behaviors that you can control.

Behoove: When things are totally out of your control (like how other people think and feel about things)- you can only do what behooves you, i.e. make the best of the situation.

Trust me - I have some first-hand experience with this kinda stuff.
The best advice I can give you is to not sweat the small things and only worry about the things you can control. You shouldn't get caught up in what other people think, feel , and how they act.


Send me an email if you want to chat about things....

Answer 6

I'm here if you ever need to talk. No one can really tell you what to do. The best thing for me had been knowing that there is at least 1 person that I can confide in that won't judge me and won't turn their back on me when things get hard and I am feeling very down. When you feel like you have no one your feelings get multiplied by 100 but sometimes if you just talk to someone then you see that things weren't as bad as you thought and you know that someone out there cares.

Answer 7

Get a differenttherapist. Take your meds. Read about depression.

Some things that work for me:

Get lots of sunlight. Be outdoors as much as you can, even if it's not nice weather, get out and walk, get exercise.

Get enough sleep. If you can't sleep, don't drink yourself to sleep or get addicted to pills. Learn relaxation therapy, and until you do, just lie down in the dark listening to music. Don't read in bed, cause you'll not get enough sleep.

Eat well. Don't over eat or starve yourself. All things in moderation.

Declutter. Get help if you are a messy or disorganized person. Tell your counselor. Read about OCD.

Learn proper spelling, punctuation, and grammar. It really does improve your self esteem. (lol).

Listen to music which uplifts you. Learn the lyrics. Don't listen to "emo" music, or songs about hate, death, suicide, etc.

If you have heat, crank up the heat. Being cold doesn't help depression.

If you live in a very hot climate, get cool.

Do lots of artsy craftsy things. Keep busy. Do puzzles, crosswords, logic puzzles.

Keep a journal.

Answer 8

the worst thing you could possibly do is kill yourself. What i reccomend is to find traits about yourself/the world that you like, and find many resons why you should be happy like: think of people who have a harder time in life like people who have cancer or are already dying. Or list the ways on how much you love life. BE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS! i mean think about it....if you dont take care of this problem soon, you might just try to take matters into your own hands....and trust me thats not what you really want to happen! You need to find some real help...and then be serious about this depression! I mean really! This could soon turn into a life or death matter or something if you dont get help ASAP! I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 9

Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..

But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.

Helping you eliminate depression?

Answer 10

What makes you fee the saddest, is it work? is it when you are alone? is it when you think about your future? Think about when you feel the most depressed, what happens before that? Start a journal, write down your feelings, what you feel, why you think you feel that way. Sometimes meds help, but sometimes not, talking about it helps if you feel comfortable with the person you talk to. What about a support group? you don't have to go in person, there are web ones in yahoo, why not try them? join and post your feelings, people will respond and maybe they went through something similiar and can relate and help you. People aren't receptive to being around depressed people sometimes, so it could be your friend never was down before to the extent you are, you have to find people who can relate to you that cheer each other on, help each other through the rough spots, and know what it's like to be in your shoes.

Answer 11

I know you said you quit going to the therapist because you feel weird talking to someone, but that is a therapist's job. They are meant to listen, be objective, & give you feedback in order to help you. You shouldn't feel any pressure talking to a professional like you might w/ friends. I think you should really consider going back to therapy - stick with it, even when you're uncomfortable & know that you are getting the proper help. Sometimes we have to push ourselves out of our comfort zones in order to get anywhere, so don't feel strange about talking to someone about your problems. Get everything off your chest, & the more you go the easier & more comfortable it will become. About your friend that stopped talking to you after you told her about everything, she obviously was not a good friend to you if she gave up on you like that! Do not take that kind of thing personally - you did NOTHING - all you did was confide in someone you thought was your friend. Some people don't want to be faced with something like that, but your true friends would probably be glad you told them & would try to help you in any way they can. Hang in there. There is hope, you just have to seek out the help you need & go for it - stick with it.