Try to keep this short. But me and my g/f had been together for 2 1/2 years. Out of the blue she said she needed a break to think about things. Well I was all for it. But after a couple days I started missing her too much and asked her to come home. She said she needed some time. That she loved me but was not sure if she was still in love with me. Said she wanted to take some time and she would be home before X-mas. that didnt work for me... so now we have broken up completely, she has moved all her stuff back to her parents and we have not talked in almost a week. Word on the street is she is dating some guy. I asked her about it and she said no it is just a friend from work and he is too young for her. yeah right.... but how can she just walk away without working on things? I treated her good, maybe was not as attentive the last 6 months or so. but overall we had a really good thing. So how could she move on so fast? how can she not miss what we had together?
2006-11-26 14:12:17 · 19 answers · asked by lost_93710 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What are you holding on to?
She left you becaus that was her choice. Perhaps she chose that long ago and only now is acting on it. It sounds like she is done working on things.
She wanted something different, you gave her am ultimatum and she is moving on. WHo knows why she is doing it so fast, but that's her business and has nothing to do with you. Understanding where she is coming from will not change the fact that she is gone.
You miss what you had together. No one can promise forever, not really. Remember the good times and you will always have those fod memories. Take care of yourself and enjoy your life. If you set your attitude to receive love and wonder, they will find you.
2006-11-26 14:19:18 · answer #1 · answered by teach_empathy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many articles written about new love...the chemistry going on inside the body and the excited high feelings...but after being with someone for a year or so...the chemicals change and we don't feel the same high excitement but if the love is true, it continues to grow and mature. I'm sure she does miss what you had together for so long but you said you have not been as attentive for 6 months! That's a long time to not show her that you really love and care for her. She felt rejected and perhaps like you take her love for granted and don't appreciate her.
The story about the other guy may be true....that it's just a friend from work....but at least he is probably showing her more attention than you did. Girls want to ALWAYS feel loved and wanted; no matter how long the relationship.
2006-11-26 22:26:40 · answer #2 · answered by Patricia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the info you gave SHE had already made up her mind to switch rather than fight.
The "last six months or so of non-attentive" would definitely do the trick. No matter what you did, shared the 2yrs before when that changes and is gone then it is gone. If/when someone else supplies the attention, regardless of what time it will be a magic.
Lastly it does not matter how YOU perceived the relationship it is how SHE perceives and feels it
So the short answer to you direct question YES. You have no choice since it seems that SHE has let it go.
2006-11-26 22:22:04 · answer #3 · answered by GERALD S. MCSEE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DUDE !!! You already know your answer !! "....... maybe not as attentive the last 6 months or so ...... " is what did it !!! You had 6 months to work things out -- but you were thinking she would be 'just fine' without your attention, didn't you ?
GUESS AGAIN !!!! Move on and leave her alone. You already 'let go' 6 months ago. She's done with you & does not need to explain things any further -- you explained it all yourself !
Good luck next time -- hope you learned from this!
2006-11-26 22:20:38 · answer #4 · answered by Maewest 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh you just wait she will come running back when you do not need her anymore. At least she broke it off before cheating. You thought it was good but she didn't, otherwise she would still be there. Let her go if you ever want a chance again because bothering her about this will only push her further away.
You sound like your too good for her anyways. She's not gonna admit to you she was on a date because she may need you back soon!
Good luck but all I can say is move on to getting over her so you do not get hurt further with this.
2006-11-26 22:19:10 · answer #5 · answered by ~Another Day~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you only really have control over one person in a relationship -- yourself. While you say everything was working well, you also allude to the fact that perhaps it wasn't. If it wasn't working for you, and you want to remain in the relationship, perhaps things really were not working for your girlfriend.
Try to communicate with her. It sounds like this has been lacking between you two. If you can't develop basic communication skills and get to the root of the issues, odds are good that it's over, and you should just let go. Even if you do decide to be honest with each other, of course, things may still be over. Best of luck figuring this out.
2006-11-26 22:16:30 · answer #6 · answered by question_ahoy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It appears she has already let go of you, so there is nothing to hold on to. A slippery hand can not be held onto. However next time you are in a relationship be attentive to the early signs and fix them immediately, don't wait until they have moved on to try and fix things as you may have found out after it is too late.
2006-11-26 22:26:00 · answer #7 · answered by M. R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sometimes when you love someone you just don't have the courage enough to tell them you don't want to be with them anymore. I think this is what happened to you. Your girlfriend just wants to be with someone else but it is still unfair for you to wait. Tell her it is over for good and wait for her reaction. If she is like "oh well" then you know she is no longer in love with you. On the other hand if she is like "let's try to work it out" then you will know that she still wants to be with you but just really does need some space. Be careful of this also because some girls think they have a sucker boyfriend and will try to string you along. And be positive. If she does not want to be with you anymore just think of it as gaining a special friend instead of losing a girlfriend. And always remember jealousy is the key. If you guys are really over, be friends enough with her to show her what she missed.
2006-11-26 22:22:06 · answer #8 · answered by wizzle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she misunderstood herself when she said she needed a break. I think she meant to say she wanted to break up. If she had nothing to say when you broke up chances are she moved on long before the break up. Take some time for you. Get your head together and do your best to live you life one day at a time. It will get easier, I promise you.
2006-11-26 22:20:32 · answer #9 · answered by bellbottombleus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it wasnt "out of the blue"....you admitted not being attentive in past 6 months....maybe you didnt notice the breach was widening all the time.....Who says she doesnt miss what u had???...Sometimes people move on so fast to get past what is happening at the moment....to get past the "missing what was" stage. I say let her go and bide your time....See where things go...Maybe you 2 are done.....maybe not.....
2006-11-26 22:23:31 · answer #10 · answered by Lrn'dTheHardWay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋