What are some good ways for a 32-year-old woman to meet Mr. Right?

Question

I'm 32 and, like many other women, I would like to eventually find Mr. Right. I work in retail, so of course, I meet all sorts of people. However, the guys I meet are usually either unavailable or uninterested. My therapist has suggested that I perhaps try online dating. However, I really don't want to do this. (No offense to those of you who've tried it, but it sort of smacks of desperation to me.) My therapist has also told me that it might be a little harder for me to find a guy in my age bracket or older, because most of them are either married or otherwise taken. And no offense to those of you who like younger guys, but I actually want a guy who's older than I am. What do you guys suggest?

By the way, I've been told that I'm quite attractive, so it's not as if I'm Quasimodo's sister.:)

Answer 1

First, be specific about your idea of Mr. Right. If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there. Once you know what kind of man you want, start going to places where men like that can be found. If you want a "life of the party" type, you probably won't meet him at the library or the art museum -- but if you want a shy, artistic type, a football game is a bad bet.

Second, be realistic in your demands (as in, don't ask for more than you have to offer). If you don't have movie star looks, insisting that he does -- and having nothing to do with any man who doesn't -- is not realistic (that's just one example).

Third, know the difference between what you _want_ and what you _need_. Have nothing to do with any man who can't offer everything that you need and at least some of what you want. Caveat: some of your emotional needs are supposed to be met by your friendships with other women, not by your relationship with a man. Don't ask him for things that he's not supposed to give you.

Fourth and last: relax. You shouldn't play hard to get, nor should you project desperation. Just have a life. Go out with friends. Get a hobby. Attend events that interest you (which will bring you into contact with men who share your interests, btw). The man you want is out there, you just have to be where he can find you. Just keep living -- as opposed to surviving -- and he will come.

Answer 2

Sounds like your therapist is leading you down a pretty dim path. Perhaps that's why you're here?

I did the on-line dating thing because I hadn't really dated alot. I married my high school sweetheart and as we grew up, we grew apart. I had a lot to learn about dating and about myself before I was ready for the relationship I have today. It was both the best thing and the worst thing I could have done for myself. I think if I had to do it all over again, I would have stuck to meeting men in the market, library, or at other social events.

I was once told to make a list of qualities I wanted in a mate. I did that and I was then told to get busy becoming those things. It was only then that I was able to attract the wonderful man I have today. I'm 37 and he's 46 and we couldn't be happier. We were introduced thru a mutual friend. It's only been 6 months for us, but we already know that this is it....Good luck. : )

Answer 3

When you least expect it Mr Right will find his way into your life. If you seriously look, you can make mistakes and may jump at the first opportunity. On-line dating isnt desperate, and is quite a sensible way of finding someone. You can do some shopping, then choose one who sounds compatible....I cant see a problem in that. I find chatting on the internet, as opposed to actual on-line dating is a great way of meeting people. I have lots of male and female friends. I have met a few men this way, but none of them ever made me feel I wanted to go further with them. I think on-line chatting is a great way to learn about someone in the comfort of your own home.
The traditional way of finding someone in the past was to meet them out and it is usually based on the looks factor. On line chatting does it the other way around and you learn about the person from the inside out. I would be careful though, if you are trully looking for Mr Right, then a lot of preditors are out there telling you what you want to hear. Be cool, and then when you get to know someone and you like each other then you can meet....and take it wherever it leads you. Just be careful of the preditors...they are out there believe me, but so are some really wonderful people too. The best way to start is to download ICQ onto your computer. Its free, from there you can search peoples profiles, send them messages, etc. It has been my experience though that most people I chat with have contacted me. It a good tool actually....Ive met a lot of interesting people this way.

I hope you find your soul mate.

Answer 4

Well, I am 24 and I am asking the same question. I think that you need to be sure that you are giving off the right vibes. Be certain that you are making yourself approachable. And this is the 21st century. If you see a male that you are interested ask him out....The worst he can say is no and that will not shatter your world or kill you. If you really want to open all channels try online dating. Go onto sites such as myspace and any other social networking site. Just get yourself out there. If you don't already have children and you want them, your clock is ticking very loudly about now. But just have faith that you will find him. Things can change drastically in just a few moments so be hopeful. Good luck to you...

Answer 5

I am actually relieved to find out that you are not Quasi's sister. I agree that online dating per se may not be the best route, but you can meet other guys out online that might be able to offer adivse or may even know of someone that might be compatible. I believe the hardest part is breaking the ice, and starting to discover how much or how little you may have in common.

Answer 6

What are you waiting for gather up some of your girl friends get dolled up and go out. You know what kind of man you are looking for so go get him. You do what you want but I think the online dating is scary people will lie to get you to want them. I hope you find Mr. Right and if it takes you a while oh well you are still young you will eventually find him good luck!

Answer 7

Open your eyes and mind. It's just that easy. We are everywhere, but we bore most women eventually, so, by the time we are in our late 20's, 30's, we are so burned out on trying that we hide. There is a secret handshake for all the nice guys who have gotten burned in the past. If you learn it, maybe you will see it on the street and know that he is who you're asking about here.

Answer 8

do you have "friends" who know that you are looking. If so you can send the "word" out that you are looking to meet someone.

chances are you would have a line-up. also at work do the other staff members go out for drinks on an occasional friday, if so get into that group. who knows,.......

In retail, you can always "give the come hither look" but this is to be carried with caution. Fine line between "tramp and seductive"

Answer 9

Not knowing where you live makes it difficult, but the guys you would be looking for attend auto shows, gun shows, and Plays. If you have a nice restaurant nearby, go there and let a waiter know what you are looking for and you may get a hint about someone.
There are also church functions which I don't attend, and sporting events are very popular with them.
Good luck

Answer 10

Madi, at 17 maximum adolescents have considered each thing. the only reason i'm able to think of which you will not choose something too loopy is which you would be with them watching and you do not choose to be embarrassed. discover something in comedy or a action picture with between the stars of the 2d. %. something somewhat new (in basic terms released) or something quite previous, it will develop the possibility of them not having considered them.