I feel so hopeless, worthless, depressed & alone:?

Question

'm 26, just got a condo, good job, far from ugly, college educated: YET this single life is really depressing. I feel like there's no hope unless I have a man, yet, I feel like I shouldn't just settle for the first guy that passes by. I dont think my standards are too high, I just want someone who can take care of himself and treat me right. I'm not looking for anyone based on material things or anything of that nature because I can do that on my own. Just someone who won't cheat or use me, yet that seems to be all I've been attracting for a while (guys who just seem to use me)..Should I just settle for the next guy that passes by just so I wouldn't feel lonely or should I keep on looking? I'm not hung up on material possessions either..just someone who can take care of themselves basically..I even thought about getting back together with my x even though he treated me like complete dirt, just so I wouldn't have to be alone. Should I just give up looking or keep hope? It's kinda hard 2

Answer 1

Sounds like your standards are too low if you let the last few guys use you. You need some interesting, exciting hobbies to get rid of the stench of desperation. Plus, you'll meet interesting, exciting men while you're at it.

Answer 2

I'm going to answer your question with a question, Because I have no idea why a " far from ugly " educated women would have a problem finding a guy or the right guy for that matter, because i can tell you there are so many guys in this world that are sitting at home alone right now wondering where they can meet someone just like you, so my Question is where do you hangout what do you do other than work and do you make your self open to be approached by guys that may not be so sure a woman like you would have anything to do with them.

Answer 3

Don't settle for just anyone and for goodness sakes don't go back to someone who treated you like dirt. At 26 you still have plenty of time to shop around. Life can be lonely even when you are with a man. Find the one that makes your heart beat faster when he walks into the room. Wait for the one that looks at you and smiles just for you and when he does you will know that is the right one.

Answer 4

Wow! This sounds like my story. lol! I feel every word written here. I am also an independant woman who is attractive and I tend to have a magnet on my forehead for men that dont have it together! I end up needing to get a tax return for all the money I end up spending. Being that Im in the situation as you doll, all I can say is wait! You can have a few dates and boy toys here and there until you meet "Mr. right" but don't settle for less and comit just for the sake of things. We independant women can be a bit of a challenge for men because we have high expectations and they know it! But only the worthymen will go the extra mile to attain us and untill then let the rotton apples fall

Answer 5

Girl, you are too lonely to be looking for a guy right now because you will accept the next loser. Never take two steps backwards when life, love and hope is forward (speaking about your ex).

It would be best for you to learn to enjoy time with yourself and friends (male and female) right now. You must be working so start out having lunch with your coworkers then having some come over for a small gathering or party for the holidays. Keep in touch with friends so that you are on their list as will for get-to-gathers.

Get involved in volunteer work, working with small children, church, lessons, teaching children to read, etc. Get a list together of the things you would like to accomplish in the next five years that have nothing to do with a man and begin accomplishing them.

Last, please don't go back to your ex knowing that he will continue treating you like dirt. I would rather be alone than with someone who would take my love, soul, mental state, joy, peace, etc from me just for what "I think maybe love".

Best of luck.

Answer 6

don't settle for less than you want from someone, as you may end up resenting him, and that wouldn't be fair on the other person. think positive, you are as you say well educated have a good job etc, yet you seem to have a negative outlook. remember one only gets out of life what one puts into it, relax more, laugh more (that in it's self is infectious)and you may attract the sort of man you really want. good luck.
ps. Confidence plays a big part also.

Answer 7

definitely don't settle for just anybody your will seriously regret that later.. and don't go back with your ex either, you are far to good for that.. i understand about the guys you seem to get, and that feeling of loneliness .. maybe you could go do something for yourself, like go out , do some thing new with your look ( hair or nails or whatever), do something you enjoy.. hang out with the girls.. plus your young and i know that you have hear this before and I'm sure this won't be the last but the right guy will come along.. everyone has to kiss a few frogs before they find there prince..

Answer 8

Keep looking don't allow yourself ever to be treated like dirt, also rather than focusing on looking for guys let them look for you, if everything in your question is true then go live your life have some fun and do not worry about it. You will find it is easier to get the guy you want if you are the girl they want go have fun and do not worry about them. Get out and be active it is the easiest way to put your mind at ease.

Answer 9

I personally think you should keep searching for the right guy. Even though it is hard to be alone, it is definately worth the wait to find that person that completes you, loves you for who you are, and treats you right. Just stay strong and you will be happy in the end

Answer 10

There's no such thing as a perfect person...you included...and I can prove this...ok...you listed all the good things about yourself...young, smart, good looking etc...but you failed to list any unredemptive qualities that we all as human beings share...I notice that in this humility isn't one of your strong suits...now....with that in mind...I think it would behoove you to find someone who is responsible yes...but not perfect...you have to understand...looking at ones self through rose colored glasses itself is a certain unawareness...and that is a detrimental characteristic by itself...when choosing a friend or companion we look for personality traits...is this person fun to be with?...is this person outgoing and generally a happy person who I enjoy being with?...draw upon some of the things you look for in friendships to help you find a companion...and no the first dude that comes along would be a one in a million shot...but remember...sometimes people do win the lotto...