what do u do when your roommate lays a guilt trip on u for going out because she doesn't want to be alone?

Question

this question is about my daughter who is 20 and a mom, her 37 year old aunt who is going thru a divorce is her roommate. My daughter can't go anywhere w/o feeling guilty. what advice can i share with her.

Answer 1

She is 20 years old and should live her life, if the aunt who is in her 30's wants to wallow around the house in misery, let her. I would just keep doing what I am doing, and truly would not feel guilty for going out. This aunt needs some counseling or something. She is being very selfish and insecure. If she does not want to be alone tell her to call a friend. If she doesn't have any it is probably because she is so needy. I would not sit around trying to appease her and make her happy at my expense. God bless****

Answer 2

UMMM sorry are u living together so u can play mommie with a newborn....u have a life and she need to get one...tell her go out out with friends from work or school..or contact old friends..she old enough to be alone...maybe once and a while u two go out for dinner and a movie some girl time..go get ur nails done or shop..go hang out so she may feels a little better...try to make her understand that u also need ur own time with ur own friends and right now ur enjoying urself in life right now...good luck

Answer 3

you at the instantaneous are not a married couple and so money shouldn't intrude with your relationship. you say your boyfriend is in college. college must be very intense priced and the student loans take invariably to receives a fee off. If he's paying his way with the help of faculty, then you definitely ought to understand that it rather is intense priced. it variety of feels that you enable him to apply your vehicle and if it rather is the case, i will't see the way you adult men can differentiate a thanks to split the gasoline contained in the only tank. If he complains about your use of his gasoline, remind him whose vehicle that's and practice him your vehicle coverage and upkeep expenditures for the vehicle or tell him to take a bus. at the same time as it variety of feels that you pay your individual prices and if it really is what he expects you to do, then he shouldn't matter upon you to pay his way. He pays his own to boot. out of your standpoint, he does sound like a consumer. in case you adore him and favor to shop him, then you definitely favor to set some floor regulations with the money situation. Like I suggested, you 2 are not married and so i do not see why you want to carry him financially. you've adequate debt of your individual.

Answer 4

She could've gone out, if not with you then on her own to be around people...surely she has other friends?

It's not your responsibility to keep her company when she's lonely...if she could've gone out with you, then make it clear it was her choice not to join you...that she's grown and although you are sorry she's feeling lonely, she needs to take steps to fix that, that don't include trying to make you feel guilty because you didn't do what she wanted.

If she's not very social, do what you can to help her become moreso or to introduce her to nice people...beyond that, it's up to her...even shy people are capable of making friends and getting out of lonely "slumps" if they really want to (I should know, I'm a shy person).

She's not being fair trying to lay a guilt trip on you...don't let it work...suggest she take a class or join a club or take up a hobby that includes interacting with other people if she doesn't want to be "alone"...she should not expect you to stop your life, to keep her company.

Answer 5

i wouldnt let it bug me. just because youre roommates, does not mean you have an obligation to keep that person accompanied.

however, if you two were close enough.. maybe you would have a little concern to ask if they would like to join you.

if you arent close at all... then by means, you can do whatever, however, whenever you want. it isnt your responsibility to get them out of the house. it's their choice to leave or not.

dont let this person bug you!

Answer 6

Tell her that you understand that she doesn't really like being alone, but you have people that you want to spend time with, outside your house. Invite her out on occasion, and tell her that she can feel free to go out with her friends.
If she keeps on acting like a child, tell her to grow up,and if she doesn't, its probably time for a new room mate =(

Good luck!

Answer 7

Well for one you should not bother listening to her, because she needs to get a life. Also you should go out whenever you want not be told when to. Tell her she needs to chill and don't worry.

Answer 8

I agree with Tina, she needs to grow up and stop watching scary movies then. You won't be around her all of your life, so she needs to find another way to be alone and not be scared.

Answer 9

They sound a bit sensitive to your not wanting to be with them for whatever reason. If you wanted them with you, you'd invite them. Otherwise, they just need to deal with it and find something to do on their own when you're not around.

Answer 10

Man this sounds like that movie" single white female" Just tell her you have your life and she has her. but be carful she dont start wearing your cloths and fixes her hair up like yours. you will have a mess on your hands.