hello I'm 23 years old my wife is pregnant, I would like to hear about other fathers experiences, I'm scared that I won't get my goals accomplished, it seems that my child might set me back but I still want to have my child.I'll admitt I am somewhat of a selfish person. I hope all of this will change when my child is actually born. I never thought I would be a father, I feel like I'm going to fail at it. I don;t think I'm a father type, but I'm not going to be a deadbeat I'll take care of my child by any means but I think I'm as far as being a good father figure I going to fail (curse like a sailor, selfish, and a bit of a temper). Can any fathers give me some advice?
Thank you
2006-11-26 07:18:58 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
You're already startin on the good foot by deciding to be the father of your baby and taking responsibilty...i don't think any father was 100% prepared or knew what to expect when they had a child...my dad didn't, and i'm a love child too. But my dad just had to prioritize his life....his wife and his newborn baby , and the health and well-being of both, so he sacrificed and worked his *** off to take care of us....and from living in a trailer, to having a 2-story house, 3 sons that respect and love him to death, and a legacy of accomplishments, being set back was completely clouded by what value he has with his family and his status as a good father.
You want to be a good father, just know your priorities, which now is your child, and the mother if ya'll are still together. You'l have to sacrifice, and go through drama, like everyone else, but as long as you have the patience, and the ambition to love your new family, and put only the best in their life....ALSO, working together with the mother.....you'll hopefully end up being a respected father, full of accomplishments, and a legacy to be proud of....good luck to ya...and thanks for not being the piece of sh*t dads that run from their responsibilities like p*ssies.
2006-11-26 08:01:33 · answer #1 · answered by Dennis 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a DAD. Nothing against moms ... but sometimes dads need another dad. I am a student, I am writing a novel, and I am working in a hospital (clinical rotations for Nursing school.) I am busy busy! But, my little girl is the most important thing I have ever, or could ever do. This is LIFE, man. What are you trying to accomplish other than having meaning and love in your life? That's what a baby is ... everything else will pale by comparison. I know,I know, this sounds cheesy, but I have been where you are too. I am a dreadfully selfish person ... I worried constantly that I was going to be a lousy father ... I even went to the point where I wondered if it was a big mistake. I learned, and you will too. I wont say it will be easy or that you wont have regrets, but, man, when that little person looks at you and smiles, you will find the love of your life, and the meaning you have all ways been looking for.
2006-11-26 07:39:22 · answer #2 · answered by Novel Hack 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel badly that you didn't let your fears of fatherhood give yu a clue about how to behave in the bedroom--or whereever the deed took place. It's very important that you shape up and raise your child properly because the world, and this country in particular, have quite enough abused, neglected, and un-nurtured children already. Once you get into it, you may well like it. For me, it's very difficult not to feel protective toward a baby and to want to help it along. Get some books on parenting and, very importantly, think about the mistakes that were made raising you and don't repeat them. Good luck.
I can tell you that there is nothing so heart warming in the world as getting love and affection from a kid that has grown up to be a fine adult--sometimes in spite of me, the father.
2006-11-26 08:01:33 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Adoption is a attractive loving decision were anybody wins. Your toddler will advance up so very needed with the help of this is mom and father, you get to be 18 with the total international accessible nonetheless complete of chance. little ones ought to receive each and every chance for fulfillment, and the chaos you situation is in is not any position for a baby to advance up i imagine you comprehend that and for this reason your asking. Abortion is a tremendous decision and one which leaves people feeling empty interior. Adoption is not difficulty-free yet worth it and is something you may experience sturdy about. Plus with adoption you may even see your toddler be a component to this is existence and comprehend you positioned it in an section were they could thrive.
2016-11-26 23:27:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Might want to look into parenting classes.
There is no shame in this. We have to take classes for other things, like driving, etc. SO why not parenting. We are not born knowing how to be a good parent. Of course our instincts kick in, we know how to provide the basics...food, shelter, etc. But we do not know how to keep out children from spending adult hood in therapy, instinctively. I think everyone should be required to take parenting classes...long before they even begin families, and pass a test before they are allowed to have children. :)
Good luck with the newest member of your family and just remember to love him or her as best you can
2006-11-26 07:27:27 · answer #5 · answered by Em W. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Charles....I was scared too. My goals in life were to be thrown out the window. I had soooo many things I enjoyed doing and many thing I wanted to do. Yep...me me me. And if things didn't go as planned...watch out. Well sure enough,My Son was born ( not that there was anything I could do about it...or wanted to do ) It took him and I about 2min to get use to each other. To my suprise,he taugh me to be a better Man, a better Husband and a Good Dad. Hang in there buddy...He or She will teach you all you need to know .
2006-11-26 07:37:54 · answer #6 · answered by R W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are worried about certain aspects of yourself as a father is a great sign. I am not a man, but I am a pregnant woman that has some of these thoughts as well.
2006-11-26 07:22:42 · answer #7 · answered by Hanky 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a father, I'm a mother. But there is one thing that I can tell without a doubt; when you have a baby your whole attitude changes! Trust me! It just does. You wont fail, you wont curse, you wont do a lot of things that you used to do. Instinctually you just do! Good luck!
2006-11-26 07:22:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah, well done to you for being so open about it. You worrying and caring that much already makes me think that your little one will be much more of a drive and encouragemant than a hindrance in fullfilling your goals, Good luck and enjoy.
2006-11-26 08:00:18 · answer #9 · answered by sins 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you saw my husband youd think hes not the father type but he is brill at it. he is 23 and has a 7 month baby and was afraid he would not be any good as a father but he has proved himself wrong. believe me when your baby arrives youl suprise your self
good luck
2006-11-26 10:46:52 · answer #10 · answered by sharon b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋