I have a question about molestation?

Question

Ok I'll try to be breif..I met my husband when my daughter was 2. He has been her only father figure. She is now nearly 15, recently she has confided in me that her dad has been comming into her room at night. Now he has done this with my son as well..his bio/son. But lately she has been feeling uncomfortable about this because he likes to lay down in the bed with her. My husband HAS been known to sleep walk alot. But the other night he woke her up when he seemingly mistakenly grazed her breast. How do I handle this? How do I make my husband understand that it is NO LONGER appropriate to snuggle with our daughter at night...cuz it's freaking her out. She swears that he has never outright touched weirdly. But she and I are worried that he may in his sleep mistake her for me, thinking that he is in our bed and not hers. We also look exactly alike now? Should I be worried that maybe he is a closet freak..I don't know what to do.

Answer 1

Get him to a sleep clinic. If he is truly sleepwalking, then he genuinely does have no idea what he's doing. My ex sleepwalked, and one night I found him outside riding the 4 wheeler 3 blocks away. Another time, he got in the shower, naked, and did not turn the water on, but had shampoo all over himself. My sister sleepwalks, and we used to have to lock her door from the outside because she fell down the stairs several times, finally breaking her arm.

If I were you, I'd call the nearest sleep clinic and make an appointment for a sleep study. In the meantime, I'd install a lock on the kids' doors if they don't already have them. Better safe than sorry. But, knowing what I do about sleepwalkers, I wouldn't lable him a pedo just yet.

Answer 2

Well first try and get him into a sleepers clinic. (Lots of states have them) and then go from there. If he is really walking while he is sleeping then I would confront him about it. I would confront him about it to begin with. Talk to him with your daughter present. I know that it will be difficult but you've to to get the point across that this is not appropriate anymore. There could be something mentally wrong ( I hate to say that) but if he is doing things like this and has done it before then there is cause for concern. Just straight out tell him that it can not happen. Have your daughter sleep with the door locked so that he can't get in if she is that terrified about it.

GOOD LUCK!

Answer 3

well, how would you react if a stranger was going to your children's rooms at night? You'd wonder what the heck he was doing in there, right?

It is not okay for this to be happening, and frankly, I think your children may have already been molested. The sleepwalking is BS.
You're giving him his excuse by even suggesting that he might mistake her for you.

If your husband balks at not snuggling with your daughter at night, this shows that he doesn't have her best interests at heart--only his own. You shouldn't have to make him understand.
By not setting boundaries you're sending the message to BOTH your kids that their individual needs don't matter.

I'd want to knw what he's doing in EITHER of their rooms after bedtime. And I would accept no excuses.

Answer 4

Well what if he mistakens her for you and decides to have intercourse?He has a problem and he needs to be kept out of the kids bedrooms at all times if not out of the home.I was molested as a child and I can asure you that sleeping walking isnt a excuse.You might want to consider calling the police if he is touching your children.Don't be selfish and be afraid of being a single parent.At least you would be able to rest at night knowing their father isnt molesting them.Kids should always come first and it is your job to protect them!!!

Answer 5

Well, I would definately be on guard. the camera thing mentioned in an other answer is good.At the same time you should trust your motherly instinct. Protect your your child. I personally only need my childs word to convince me that he is a pervert. when do pedophiles come out and be honest anyway. If you feel that there is something wrong, as much as it hurts you need get away from the situation. So that nothing happens to her that will scar her for life. I am truly sorry but please do whats right for your young lady.

Answer 6

He know exactly what he's doing. You need to give him up. this can be detrimental in the long run. The sleep walking could be a cover up. **** doesn't just happen this way. And it could be that she's comfortable with him now but shes use to it, but now shes of age and knows its right he probably has already done something like this before...Woman 2 Woman take care you kids be a mother....

Answer 7

1. send your husband to therapy
2. possibly send your daughter theapy...there may be things she's not telling you
3. look back through your life with your husband and see if there was a time in which his actions has changed or your childrens behaviors have changed.
4. it is possible your husband is a freak
5. it is possible he has no idea what he is doing
6. seriously, talk and send your husband to thearpy.
7. if you and your daughter are really worried about the possibilities, spearataiton is a option. you childrens safty comes first.

Answer 8

You live with a child molester. Your only move should be with your kids out the door. Then call the cops and turn him in. Or his son will be molested too. (He snuggles with kids and "accidently" touches her breast? C'mon...listen to your mother's intuition.)

Sorry to hear, but this is serious!

Answer 9

watch him.. maybe try and put a video cam in her room at night to see if he actully is sleep walking or if hes doing somethng else or just lock her door at night but keep an extra key with you incase

Answer 10

Don't kid yourself. your husband is molesting your children. Get help, DO NOT ALLOW YOUR HUSBAND TO ENTER THEIR ROOM AT NIGHT!!!! put a lock on the door that he can't open, and get professional help now!