Different?...?

Question

I have tried killing myself 3 times and i getting more and more depressed. my mum have started acting strange, like i am the odd one out. she isn't being horrible to me, she gives me more chances if i do something wrong. many people might say that what are you whining about. but i hate being treated different from my sister. i want it to go back to normal.

Plz Help.
- i am 13.

Answer 1

hello hex i feel so sad for you as you feel alone and isolated and have started to self harm.don't you have anyone you can talk to like a family member teacher or a school councillor please go to the doctors and see him as i have a 13 yr old daughter myself and would hate it if she felt suicidal so please get some help

Answer 2

Hello Sweetheart,

You are at a really challenging time of your life, and your body is probably amok with hormones, so this may be contributing to your depression and unhappy feelings. But I also think there are some things happening or that have happened in your life that have led to you feeling so down.

Your Mum may be acting strangely because she is worried about you. She wants to help you.....but I wonder if you are afraid of what she might say if you really shared the reasons for your unhappiness?

Imagine you had the most gorgeous little puppy (hope you like dogs!) and you loved him to bits. But the little puppy started hating himself and just didn't want to be around you any more. Imagine him jumping in the pond to try and drown himself. How would you feel? You might feel heartbroken and at a loss to know how to help the puppy feel better. You might be feeling confused because you don't know why he's acting that way and you might be afraid that you'd done something wrong that caused him to do this. You call the puppy, but he doesn't come.

Now imagine that this is how your Mum is feeling about you, and is why she is treating you differently.

I wonder if you feel you could talk to your Mum about your feelings and what is going on for you? Perhaps it might be easier to write her a letter. It might help you both to understand what is going on for you. You could also talk about how it makes you feel when you are treated differently from your sister.

If you don't feel able to confide in your Mum, is there another relative, or a grown-up friend you could confide in?

Or you could telephone Childline, which is confidential.

It would be so good for your family and yourself if you found the courage to look at your unhappiness and deal with it. Otherwise it will get worse.

How you are feeling right now is not the real you. You are not your best self at the moment. Whatever has happened in your life isn't the end of the world. There is so much more to life that you haven't even tasted yet, and if you haven't tasted it then how do you know that you don't want to live? You have so much potential and so much to give.

I believe that each one of us has a special purpose in life ~ something we have come to do. When we discover what our purpose is we will feel happier.

There is also a reason why you have had the experiences you've had in your life so far. Although it doesn't seem like it at the time, once you get through them you will be stronger and you will have learnt something that you came to learn.

One thing I like to do when I get myself into a place where I don't feel good and I hate life, is to find a book about some aspect of life I haven't tasted. It opens me up to realise that life has much more than I'm experiencing and that's pretty exciting.

So, here's my challenge to you, Sweetheart: CHOOSE LIFE (It will get better when you find someone you can talk to, and make up your mind that you're gonna give life another go. You would regret it if you gave up and then discover that you'd missed out on the best bits!

Answer 3

I have found that if you talk to the source of the problem (your mom) about the problem it usually gets cured. She might not even notice that she's treating you differently than your sister. If that doesn't help I would talk to a teacher or other authority figure at your school to get suggestions from them. They might even be able to tell you what to say to get the most good out of the conversation because believe it or not yours is a very common problem. Most importantly don't get depressed and start thinking suicide is the answer. It never is. Just talk through your problems. There is no easy way out but there is a way out.

Answer 4

This is flagging up 'HELP' in capital letters. You can't do this on your own, you need professional help. There are a couple of organisations that can provide help - www.connexions-direct.com, www.getconnected.org.uk, youngminds.org.uk. All of these have free helplines
Otherwise Parentlineplus are 24 hours and there is also Childline which tends to be v busy.
It would help if you could talk to someone about your feelings. Damning them up until you feel suicidal is not the way to go. I know it sounds weird but talking to strangers is often easier that talking to family. Even better is talking to a friend you can trust. Schools sometimes have counsellors.
Get Connected and Connexions text directly to your mobile and provide individual support.
There are lots of people out there willing to help you and your mum, so reach out while you can. There is not need to suffer like you are.
Bless you and take care of yourself - suicide is not the answer for someone so young and so full of potential.

Answer 5

You silly girl!! You silly girl!!

Do you understand that you are craving for attention and you succeded!! Do understand why your mother acting strange because you put her through alot, she's worried your gonna do it again!! You want to go back to normal, it's up to you to start getting things back to normal, it's you that causing all this!! Why are you trying to kill yourself because you being treated different? is there any wonder for the way you behave. Start acting like a 13 years old and it's YOU to get things back to normal. You sister, as far i'm concern if you and your sister would like to be treated the same well stop acting like a spoilt little brat!!

I'm sorry i'm writing like this but I just can't understand why people wants to take their own life, I mean things changes if you want things to change. My couisn killed herself 8 years ago, we never found out why she did it, there's alot shes missing since she's been gone,She passed all her A-Levels, she has loads of neices and newphews, all her sister's and brother got married and have beauiful kids. her mother miss her every day and not a day goes by she never stops thinking about her.

I think you should think about what your doing to yourself, I would love to gave you a big hug and say it's gonna be okay.

Get along with your sister, share same things, tell her how your feeling about her and how it's making you feel.

Good Luck and Chin up love.

Answer 6

I do feel for you. I tried suicide twice. The first time when I was 16 and the second(last) time aged 19. I felt no-one understood me. I was also bullied at school. This played a part. So please talk about your feelings with someone because there is a saying-A problem shared is a problem halved. And it is true. You won't feel half so depressed if you talk to someone you can trust about your hurts. If you don't feel you can trust anyone you know then go to your local church to see the priest or vicar. They will help. It is what they are there for. Or you could phone The Samaritans who are in the phone book. Take care and God bless you.

Answer 7

Honey, trying to kill yourself isn't a healthy thing to do, and it's not a good idea. It's a permanent solution to a problem that I promise is temporary. I don't have any information about your sister, but you get treated differently because you're different people at different ages with different needs. Your mom doesn't want you to die, that's why she's been easier on you. She loves you. Also, depression scares people who don't have it because you can't see it like you can see a rash, or even diabetes. So it's unpredictable and hard to understand. That's why you get told to stop whining. They don't know how to deal with your depression. You need to talk with a teacher or counselor about your feelings; if you've seen a doctor for your depression you should also talk to him or her about how your depression is getting worse. I also hope you can encourage your family to learn about depression, so they can treat you with understanding.

Being 13 is the hardest thing I ever did, but it won't be forever. As you get older it does get better. Please don't kill yourself. You deserve to live a long, happy life.

Answer 8

I know exactly what you're feeling. I was in your shoes not more than a year ago. My grandpa died (I was really really close to him) my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend, my other best friend killed herself, and then I got caught shoplifting and my family was ashamed of me and embarassed to be around me. I tried to kill myself twice. I cut and I did anything I thought would get me out of the crappy lifestyle I had made for myself. It sucked big time. Finally I told my mom that I wanted a counciler because I just couldn't handle the depression anymore. I went through three councilers before I finally found one that wasn't a ditz and actually listened to what I had to say and actually gave me feedback and helped me. But it was really worth it. You are 13 and from these other answers it seems like some people don't realize that alot of people start getting depressed at 13. Tch I'm 14 I started at 12. Tells you what kind of world we're all living in. But seriously talk to your parents and get a counciler. You know your problem and you want help. That's the first step. Now you just have to get the courage to ask for help. It makes a world of difference.

Answer 9

Woah, there, you've tried to kill yourself? And you think your mum is the one acting weird? She is giving you extra chances probably because she loves you. Should she treat you and your sister the same? Has your sister tried to kill herself three times as well?
I know when you are 13 life is pretty bloody horrid, but it does get better I promise. There will be ups and downs that are part of being human, and no-one claims it's easy.
There is a whole world out there to see and to experience, swimming in warm seas, and watching the moon from under rainforests, drinking fine wines, and eating all sorts of exotic things - these things are all out there for the taking but you have to stay living to be around to expperience them.
Please call childline 0800 1111, annd talk to someone. You mum may be trying the best she can to help but if you feel it is making things worse for you then get in touch with some people who have experience in these things.
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, please don't give up, things can get better. focus on what you want, and if you are so down you don't want anything then help some other people get what they want out of life.
Life can be hard, but believe you me, life can be fun!

Answer 10

Hey,
I really suggest you consider talking to your Doctor.... The way you are feeling is the first thing to tackle but in the right way...

If you really really feel you cannot voice your inner fears with either of your parents/school counsellors then if you can get hold of a local phone directory you can find people who will totally give you help on where you can get help...

You are not alone in what/how you are feeling... Family life is fantastic and can also be sooooo hellish... But know what that's normal....

But the most important points are: Voicing how you are feeling and voicing them to someone suitable Parents/Trained counsellor/your Doctor....

Best of luck!!! And btw I hated 13 as well... Be strong!! Be positive!! Be in control of what you do in a positive way!!

Answer 11

before i start i understand where you ar ehalf coming from i also suffer from depression.
What is the point of taken your life?
you have loads to life for look at the postives in your life you will have some even friends etc...
Talk to your mum this is really important i know it is really hard i have been there, and to this day only my mum and dad know my brother and extented family dont know.
You need to explain how you feel and what makes you feel like this, what gets said or done to make you feel this way. If you cant talk to your mum try a friend or the doctor someone you trust.
Once you have looked at your life and events leading to it, ask yourself how could you change the situation to stop yourself from trying to kill yourself.
The main thing is you havent killed yourself and you have took the 1st step trying to get helped.

Even it helps feel free to talk to me through this go to my profile e-mail via that.

Good luck i will help if i can
Giraffe