I'm to shy, what to do?

Question

Yesterday there was a girl who i relay liked and i wanted to dance with her but i was to shy to ask, and now i'm mad at myself for not asking. I dont know how to start a conversation with a girl i relay get a lot of stress around girls I like.

Answer 1

you have to take a deep breath and get the courage. she is only a person; try not to be intimidated. start off by asking how she liked the dance. (was this at a club or school?) don't be afraid to tell her you wanted to ask her. then ask her to the movies or something.

Answer 2

Shyness is an ugly beast, I hate it so much.
But don't beat yourself up too much over it.
For some people the shyness will disappear over time, but I would never rely on this alone.
Basically I think that shyness is really just the fear of bad things that may happen as a result of your actions. If you look at it that way, the best thing to do would probably be to focus on the GOOD things that may happen if it works, rather than the bad things if it doesn't work.

That's just a tip that may get you through some awkward situations, but it's not the ultimate cure for shyness. But especially if you're still young, the more you try doing things you're shy about, the more your mind will become convinced that whatever happens, it doesn't hurt as much as you imagined even if it goes wrong. So next time you'll probably worry less.

I don't want to sound like I'm an expert, actually I'm still struggling with it myself, which in fact does make me somewhat of an expert :) how sad is that?

But you can get so much better if you want it so good luck!
Vickie

Answer 3

I used to have this problem and solved it this way. Most people are happy that you approach them and ask to dance. If she refuses you, that's the risk you must take, but it is a risk you must take.
No-one knows who you are, so you must PRETEND to be a non-shy person, in other words act a role as if you are an actor. Just smile and say "I wonder if you'd like to dance...?" After you have forced yourself to do this a few times, it won't seem so bad.
Remember, you must risk looking stupid if she says no, and just say "Well, thanks anyway," and just walk calmly away.
It is important to smile, and you don't have to seem confident, just nice and happy.
Take a big breath and force yourself to do it, the first few times. Like every new thing, it will finally become familiar and not scary at all. And remember, it is better to try than be furious with yourself the next day that you didn't dare try. The worst that can happen is that she says "No," in which case, she is the loser, right?
Good luck. You can do it!

Answer 4

I know its the obvious answer and nearly everyone has said it, but the best thing to do around girls you like is Be Yourself! Eventually you will find a girl who you like that will like you for you, and thats the most important thing!

That being said, sometimes you need to push yourself to make the initial contact, ie, start a conversation, find a way of keeping contact with her, through a common interest etc.

Never go over the top and act overly outgoing and self confident, cos you won't be able to keep it up forever, but you need to let the girl know you're around, and just chatting to her about something is enough to do that.

Also, keep your eyes and ears open, for signs from her, or her friends, that she may like you back. Cos once you are fairly sure or very sure that she also likes you, then thats half the battle won!

Answer 5

one thing you should do is get rid of that shyness is to try to get in conversations with random people. A good place to do this is probably the mall. when starting a conversation always introduce yourself and then bring up a subject such as a movie that recently came out. keep getting into conversations with random people until you feel confident enough to ask a girl out. another way to gain confidence is doing something extreme or conquer one of your fears. Ok now before starting a conversation with a girl you like make sure you look good enough and dont have anything in you teeth or bad breath. when you walk up to her make sure to compliment her, that will get her attention. if you have any classes with her than ask her for notes or something like that. after you get to know her better youll feel more confortable around her thus giving you confidence to ask her out. This always works for me and im not the popular or the hot kid that every girl wants.

Answer 6

Thing is if she says no thats the worst that could happen so what are you waiting for, better to start off by chatting to some girls that you don't have a crush on, not asking them out or anything, just to get used to talking to new ppl and the like, then go for that girl, good luck

Answer 7

It's not a bad thing to be shy. It's quite endearing to some girls. Better than in your face, when can I can in your pants! Ask her how she is, & maybe if she's here with some-one. The rest should come naturally. It's just breaking the ice, with any kind of every day question. Maybe you should think of questions & comments you would say when you're with friends you're comfortable with. Very best of luck x

Answer 8

You are just lacking in confidence, and you are afraid of rejection so you won't take the first step to becoming confident. You have to realise that rejection is something we have to face in life, because it makes us strong. Just look on it as a learning curve, the more you are rejected, the more immune you become to it, and the more your confidence grows untill eventually you don't get rejected anymore. That's the worse case scenario, she could just say yes. Either way you can't loose, unless you don't try. Life is all about taking risks, and doing things that scare us sometimes. It's what builds our character, and a strong character always wins in the end

Answer 9

so what if you are shy, some girls like shy guys!! you know whats worse than failing ? not trying . whats happening is that you are afraid of getting turned down but my friend not all will say yes but out of every twenty you ask if one says yes you have won!! and as to what to say try hi! my name is ........ and see where it goes from there ,don`t try to be a player before you have learned how the game is played! practise first make a few mistakes and learn from them not let them rule you, be confident so what if she says no its her lose!! and you never know she might be waiting for you to say something!! so go on player i got faith in you its not as hard as you think!!!!!!!

Answer 10

Best answer:
1. Don't be afraid of rejection.
2. If you got a No from one girl there are hundreds more out there.
3. See each case as an experience not as your ultimate final try.