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when I was with my daughter father, he cheated on me quit a bit and he beat me relentlessly, none of wich started until after my daughter was born. when I confronted him about cheating he would just beat the crap out of me. I know all that is in my past. but because of him not only did I lose my child but I am haveing trouble trusting any guy. the past 3 relationships that I have had ended because I had trouble trusting them. I know not all men are like my ex. and I want to find someone to love and be loved back. but I need to beable to trust the guys. any tips on how to start trusting again?

2006-11-25 18:27:01 · 8 answers · asked by sweet sweet me 3 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

8 answers

I have walked down that path before. And I understand how you feel when it comes to trust, I just came out of a relationship broken hearted because that the man I were in love with cheated on me with many women, The pain is great.
All I can say is when the right man comes along, you will know.
when you meet mr right just take your time, Get to know each other. Because you will have to learn to trust all over again. I must apply this to myself as well. I have a serious trust issue as well. Trust me you will know. And you will learn how to trust again;
God Bless you.
Good luck.

2006-11-25 18:41:17 · answer #1 · answered by Diamond 1 · 0 0

Wow.. I'm sorry.
I think there are a couple things you can do - one is to take the plunge and start trusting. Let the guy know what you went through and look for warning signals, but try and trust despite what you've gone through.
Another thing is - you need to get more self confidence. You need to know that NO ONE can beat you ever. EVER. If someone hits you once, that is one time too many. You just walk away from anyone that raises a hand on you. You deserve to be loved and respected and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise.

2006-11-26 02:37:34 · answer #2 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0 0

Yes its a tricky one, Iam a guy and an ex cheated on me once and I have trouble trusting women that I date now. I tend to keep an emotional distance from women, that is I dont become so attached to them, so if they do sleep around I can just leave them without getting upset. In a way, I just use them for my own needs, but also recipricate the needs they want. After a while in the relationship, you can get a feel on wether you can trust them or not, but always protect yourself emotionally, and make sure your own needs are met, so if the partner does cheat on you, atleast you got something out of the relationship.

2006-11-26 02:37:31 · answer #3 · answered by sunline 3 · 0 0

I had a man that beat on me and cheated on me too and like you only after my daughter was born. I have trouble trusting people. The relationship I am kinda in right now is good because he knows I have the issues you have to let them know up from what is going on and let them know you got issues and through time you will trust them if they prove like they deserve it.

2006-11-26 02:30:36 · answer #4 · answered by SunShineBabe 3 · 0 0

If you can afford therapy, it can be really nice just to have someone to talk to about these things. The other thing I'd say is that a lot of the sweet, devoted guys are really shy, so I would recommend trying to date people you have known a while first as a friend and be wary of suitors who are too up front about being intersted right away.

2006-11-26 02:35:43 · answer #5 · answered by scumboot 2 · 0 0

im sorry to hear what happened to you but theirs alot of us guys who dont believe in hitting women ive always said it takes one to hit one but one of my exs said you can always tell a women beater by the way he treats the women in his life like his mom sister or even cousins and aunts if he doesnt treat them with respect hes not going to do it for you well good luck to you

2006-11-26 02:44:18 · answer #6 · answered by shorty691 1 · 0 0

trust yourself first that you would not allow another man to ruin your life again. if you have faith in yourself, it would be easy to believe that others would not betray you - simply because, you would never allow them to.

2006-11-26 02:30:50 · answer #7 · answered by Bubuchachum 6 · 0 0

you lost your kid cause he beat you up? that doesnt make sense.
oh well hope your kid is in a better home now

2006-11-26 02:31:16 · answer #8 · answered by josh_jeckel 1 · 0 0

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