I have been with my fiancee for almost 7 years and he has been doing the same thing since day 1. he likes talking to other girls in chatrooms, on the over the phone chat lines, he doesnt act on it but it makes me feel unappreciated and not respected. Recently I made my stand and i want him to change his ways and learn to respect me and appreciate me but he sees nothing wrong with his behavior because he has been this way since day one. I know that it is my fault for accepting him this way for so long...but because of that am i wrong for demanding him to change now?
2006-11-25 13:55:07 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do yourself a favor and stop the relationship immediately. If he hasn't changed his ways in the last 7 years, he isn't going to start now. You cannot change people, they have to want to be different, and they have to want to make things better for themselves. What is it about him that makes you want to stay with him? And be HONEST with yourself. Is it merely because you've been with him so long it's comfortable? I hate to be this blunt, but you need to break this one off or you will just be very unhappy as a married woman, and I can almost guarantee you will end up a divorce statistic.
2006-11-25 14:00:41 · answer #1 · answered by suz_e_q_zee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you let him do this to you for 7 years, how are you expecting him to change? you should have spoken up since day one, if he continues on with this behaviour you shouldn't even be marrying him, because he'll just cheat on you after you got married, so therefore I think you should leave the relationship and find someone better who would appreciate you, because knowing that he has a fiancee he shouldn't be talking to other girls online nor on dating services it's wrong. So, no you're not wrong to want him to change. But I do strongly suggest that you leave the relationship. But if I were you I would have left him when i found out that he was talking to other girls. I wouldn't have wasted 7 years of my life with someone like that.
2006-11-25 21:59:34 · answer #2 · answered by superboredom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After 7 years and your still just a fiancee, your not going to get him to change.
2006-11-25 21:59:20 · answer #3 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That kind of behavior will only lead to heartache i am afraid....
Do you know for a fact that he has not acted on any of this???
If it bothers you that much and you guys are going to be married he should see how much his actions hurt you and stop doing it.
If he says no then i would say leave his ***.
Good Luck
2006-11-25 22:07:48 · answer #4 · answered by Atllas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have been with him waaaaay to long. If you think he will ever change you are taking an enormous risk. Dump him and find someone secure enough in themselves to love you alone.
2006-11-25 22:02:57 · answer #5 · answered by whiterook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't except him for who he is now GET OUT you can't change him. I was married for 11 years and it didn't work. Move on and find someone that you can live with.
2006-11-25 21:58:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your not wrong for wanting him to change but you are wrong to believe that your the one that can change him. People can only change themselves. Good Luck.
2006-11-25 22:00:30 · answer #7 · answered by BluLizard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have a right to want him to change! if he is talking to other women often then I think that you may have a problem. I would've left him years ago! you need respect!!
best wishes! :]
2006-11-25 21:59:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well u dont suppose to want ti change him and theres nothing bad about it at least i dont see nothing bad.hope i help
2006-11-25 22:04:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He isn't going to change so you have to decide if it's a dealbreaker or not.
2006-11-25 21:57:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋