Fell hard for a guy; he was seriously into me and expressed it in letters, in person etc. Was great for about 4 months and now he is distant. When we see each other it is great but then he wont call or return calls. I have backed off and I am hurt. When I really back off he calls and asks why I am "down." He pulls me back in just when I am getting over all of this. I know is part my fault for seeing him after he acts like this but I still have strong feelings for him. I have asked him why this is happening and he says it is because he doesnt know what he wants. Advice???
2006-11-25 11:11:19 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
HA HA! No I did not put on weight... I run three miles 5 days per week.
2006-11-25 11:16:11 · update #1
Tell him about your strong feelings for him and that since he can't make up his mind he must quit playing with your heart because you're tired of the roller coaster ride. You've got to be strong and set some healthy boundaries here or else you're going to keep getting more of the same. Is anyone worth this to you? You've got to think more about your emotional equilibrium. Don't let this guy keep jerking you around.
2006-11-25 11:19:52 · answer #1 · answered by soulguy85 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just break up with him, don't dump him, write him a letter or send him an email and ask for a break up, it might be a little harsh on him if you dumped him when he didn't really did something wrong. But you'll feel a lot better after you're not with him anymore. I recently broke up with my boyfriend because he never seems to have time for me and he doesn't even talk to me unless I talk to him first. He treats me as if I'm not there, which seems to be your case too. I feel so much different and happier with this other guy because he really cares about me and have time for me unlike my ex-boyfriend. I always thought I love him, but then, I realized that he didn't deserve the love I gave him if he wasn't going to treat me right and give me love in return.
I'm sure it'll come out good for you too. You're tied into him and this relationship when it's not worth it at all!! Go on with life! Move on! Find someone else. There are more guys in the world you can choose from and I'm sure there will be one that truly loves you in return.
2006-11-25 19:30:12 · answer #2 · answered by Sarahie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time he doesn't return calls for a few days, go out on a date. If he asks what's up say you thought he was blowing you off. He's shopping around. Did you put on some weight?
2006-11-25 19:14:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wants to have his cake and eat it too..
He doesnt want to commit to you, but he gets a kick off the attention he gets from you and the fact that he can keep stringing you along.
It's incredibly selfish on his part, so my advice as hard as it sounds it so stop calling him and stop taking his calls, let him sweat it out a bit.. If that doesnt get him to make up his mind. Then you don't need him anyways..
2006-11-25 19:16:22 · answer #4 · answered by keith j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
break up with him even though it will be hard it sounds like he needs a lot of space to just think things through (without a girlfriend). you have given him space but i think that he needs more and more time then you are willing to give him so just cut him lose and hope for the best, call him after a while to get together and talk and see whats going on with him.
2006-11-25 19:15:04 · answer #5 · answered by ice_babe_232 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so you are saying that it is a distant relationship, he doesn't return calls and hurts you bad.
i would leave him in a flash because he hurts you on purpose, knows that you love him and only shows interest when you decide to back off.
secondly if he doesn't know what he wants by know, its pathetic.
p.s this is just my personal opinion but ultimately you make the final judgment
2006-11-25 19:16:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh god.dunno what really to say?probably back off is best.if he's gonna play games like that put your best intrests first,that is if he makes u feel bad just try forget him.i know its not easy but dont forget time is a great healer.just cut him lose.u will feel better in the long run.best of luck
2006-11-25 19:17:29 · answer #7 · answered by max 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've probably been on the other end of this problem before. I don't know your whole story but odds are your either too nice or not enough of a challenge. Try rejection next time he wants you to do something with him. example:going out with a friend tonight
2006-11-25 19:23:15 · answer #8 · answered by BRADLEY J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor dear. Truth is about 90% of the time guys don't know what they want. That's why they need women to do the thinking for them.
Don't let them know you're doing it though! Freaks them out every time they find out.
2006-11-25 19:15:05 · answer #9 · answered by Atrocious 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay so he doesnt know what he wants & he has admitted this to you, so its up to you sweetie if you wanna "wait" for him to figure out what a gem you are!!! Ask yourself honestly is he worth the wait & hurt feelings, b/c you already know the answer~ now keep in mind that you can take his distance as a healing time & "HEAL", But if you are gonna continue to reopen the wounds time & time again & you dont wanna move on then you dont have to, you already know what & who you want, but as far as i can see he wants you when he wants you & wouldnt be able to stand you "not" wanting him!! Maybe you should use that to your advantage, & tell him to shape up or ship out!!!!
2006-11-25 19:19:35 · answer #10 · answered by kimmiegaddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋