So I've been dating this great guy since around July. He's very sweet and we get along great. As my mum says, we bring out the best and worst in each other. Anyway, he's not very affectionate. He's just now started opening his arms for a hug at the end of a night. I've kissed him on the cheek. I was just wondering if there's any way (be nice, please) to get him to be a little more affectionate or to at least open the door for it. I don't want to pressure him. And I don't think that he has really had a serious girlfriend before. Does anyone have any advice? Nothing nasty, please and thanks.
2006-11-25 10:48:02 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You need to talk to him honestly about how you need affection and what that means to you. If he cares for you he will try. Just be forewarned that some guys are not very good at it; probably the way they were raised or something. Also, be forewarned that as time goes by, if being affectionate isn't easy for him, he will remember to do it less and less often.
Decide for yourself how important it is.
2006-11-25 10:53:54 · answer #1 · answered by nw_big_skies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to him about this? Your not pressuring him if your just asking for a little bit more affection.
Sometimes, men are very shy and if they've never had a girlfriend, it might take you, the girlfriend to give him a little nudge. You might slip him a little note while your having dinner that tells him what you want. You never know, he might be waiting for you to make the first move.
Good luck.
2006-11-25 18:52:28 · answer #2 · answered by Barb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you could hint at it. kisses on the cheek, holding embraces longer, little things. he may take a while to warm up, though, so give him time. if he's new to the dating game, a description of relationships i've always loved, he may not know the ways of it. little hints are pretty key: forwarded messages like those cute ones about what a kiss means, more often kisses and hugs, stuff like that. good luck!
2006-11-25 18:56:49 · answer #3 · answered by hockeychickstagecrew 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well im engaged and before my fiance i dated some guys like that. colton he had never kissed a grl or even huged a grl i think i was his 1st gf well before i knew that i was waiting for him to make the move but he never did so i asked him y he wouldnt kiss or hug me and he said because he was to nervious. so i said is it ok if i made the 1st move and he said ok and it helped him losen up a little so just ask him why he isnt being to affectionate well hope this helped
2006-11-25 19:10:09 · answer #4 · answered by babe72hottest16 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
May be he just does not know what to do. So their for you have to be the one to show him the way, so start talking to him, and say, you always open a door for a lady, all ladies. Now the kissing part, you may have to be the one to initiate kissing. You are just going to have to show him the ropes.
2006-11-25 18:54:14 · answer #5 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on. Find someone else that can meet your needs. Don't try to change him or you try the first moves like everyone is telling you to do. You cant change a person & you will just become frustrated. There are tons of guys out there with your needs, you just have to find him. Good luck.
2006-11-25 18:55:00 · answer #6 · answered by pinky 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, give him time. And always let him say when he's ready. I was like that with my boyfriend and I was really glad that he didn't pressure me into anything. He's probably shy or something. Maybe you should be the one to take the initiative of your kiss. =)
2006-11-25 18:52:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come right out and talk to him about his affection. He might be kinda shy or not wanting you to think he's too forward. Tell him that you'd like him to open up alittle more. I hope I've helped.
2006-11-25 18:50:49 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a chat with him. if your not comfortable doin this u need to make the first move. maybe now and again take again take his hand, touch his knee do little affectionate things and hopefully he'l get he message and do the same toyou. good luck!
2006-11-25 18:50:35 · answer #9 · answered by Caz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
perhaps you should try getting to know him more? it sounds like there's still a lot you know about him... the more he opens up to you the more comfortable he'll probably be with you to be affectionate.
2006-11-25 18:51:03 · answer #10 · answered by tanj 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋