Irrational fear.....?

Question

I have this weird 'problem' - I fear new things - such as trying out new things, meeting new people etc etc. May not sound so bad, but I am often irrationally scared to do things like go and get my eyebrows done, meeting up with a group of people (some of whom I don't know), even trying out a class at the gym. It takes me a LONG time to sum up the courage to get around to doing something (e.g. it took me 8 months to try a class i wanted at the gym) - does anyone else experience similar feelings? Is there anything I can do to resolve this? Why am I feeling so pathetic?

What I am trying to say is that these irrational feelings are controlling me, and I feel quite weak in that it takes me so long to come to terms with them. Another example is when I start work at a new place - it takes me about 3-6 months to settle in and start chatting with my colleagues!

Answer 1

I know how you feel, many people do. I get anxious about being around people I am unfamiliar with. As for starting new things, I've just found that it gets better with practice. The more new things you can get yourself to do (start small) the easier these things will become. When you do acomplish something, give yourself praise for summing up courage.

This does sound like social anxiety disorder. My psychology professor said that a great first step in conquering S.A.D. is by simply smiling or saying hello to people as you pass them (like at a park, or in your neighborhood).

Answer 2

I have a *complete* irrational fear of stuffed animals. Not cuddly toys but ones that a taxidermist has stuffed. This fear is so severe that I have a panic attack if I so much as see one and feel like I am going to faint. I won't even go into a place if I think there will be one inside. This fear has also extended to museums as this is where most stuffed animals are kept, so now I can barely enter museums without turning into a shaking wreck. I walked into a restaurant the other night and there was a stuffed chicken, I almost turned on my heels and walked out had it not been for 6 other people who wanted to eat at said restaurant. I spent the whole time during the meal looking warily around me to see if there were any other stuffed animals. So yeah that is my completely irrational fear.

Answer 3

Oh yes I think I can see myself quite well there.

Yes, actually on the surface it doesn't feel too bad, all you really have to do is stick to what you're familiar with and you won't be scared. Until one day you realise that this has positively stopped you from living and having fun. It can be like a cage.

I think the reason may be that people like you and me didn't grow up feeling extremely safe about exploring and trying out new things, for fear of making mistakes or disappointing others, we probably had this belief that it wasn't okay to poke into the unknown.

As for the solution, I haven't got anything ready, but I'm getting there. When fear has become such a recurrent pattern in one's life, it's usually totally useless trying to change or enforce specific behaviours such as going out, meeting people and what not. It is the underlying general sense of fear that you'll have to attack.

Don't be afraid to ask for professional help, I did it and I feel I'm definitely getting somewhere.
Vickie

Answer 4

Social Anxiety Disorder.

Answer 5

Don't call yourself pathetic, lots of people suffer from this. You are not alone and you don't need to be scared of the world, it's the only world you are going to have in your life.
You go out there with your head held high and try to get on with your beautiful life.

Good Luck!!!

Answer 6

Sounds like social phobia/anxiety to me. I don't suffer from it myself but have an anxiety disorder of my own and have read a little bit about it. Try seeing your doctor if it is having a significant impact on your life.

Don't think of yourself as pathetic as it's not true.

Answer 7

I've feared doing new things before. The best way to conquer something like that is to build your esteem with yourself and then keep doing new things. Eventually, you will feel more comfortable.

Answer 8

I think everyone gets these feelings at one time or another. The important thing is that you just do it anyway!! The more you do things you fear the less you will fear them...if that makes sense lol :)

Answer 9

yes i no how you feel, i can be the same, i get nervous meeting new people and i would be the same at joining a class, as you dont no anyone, its not pathetic ,some people are just like that

Answer 10

This is a very good blog, a beginner’s guide to abnormal psychology.
Short, clear and simple; and you can even post your question and contact the author regarding particular subject you are interested in, for FREE

http://sensitive-psychoworld.blogspot.com/