I love my boyfriend. I love him so much. We've been dating for a fairly long time and are really close.
His ex-girlfriend has been imposing quite a bit lately and here's why...
(He broke up with her, by the way, because she cheated on him with atleast two guys.)
She came to him yesterday and told him she was pregnant.
Not to be cruel to her but the number don't add up with her. Unfortunately he's too nice to say anything to her but: "I'll always be there for you and my child."
I told him that I would stick next to him no matter what and help him through this, but he's too scared to realize it means a lifetime of child support payments and guardianship battles...
I feel like, though, I would be the "other woman" who he's seeing while that poor innocent girl is having his baby...
She's not innocent, she's a bit of a *****.
But how do I approach this and save my sanity?
It would be comforting to hear some other stories of similar incidents and howt hey were handled.
2006-11-25 08:14:17 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I suppose I could look this up myself, but can they do a paternity test with a 2-3 month old fetus?
2006-11-25 08:17:55 · update #1
We're both 18. He's 6 months older than I am. I've known him for about five months before we started dating.
To the person who told me the numbers are't adding up to them either, I understand. But I know he didn't cheat on me. He's a very ...VERY VERY faithful person. I don't know. I love him so much. And this next 6 or 7 months of waiting to get a paternity test is just going to play hell on my sanity.
2006-11-25 08:32:56 · update #2
he has agreed with her that he is the father why ?? why did he dump her for sleeping around then ?? is he an hypocrite or to nice to dump you and realy wants to get back with her and this baby thing is all a ploy ? if i am wrong then tell him he doesn't do anything until the baby is born and gets tested to be 100% certain it is his child he was her boyfriend once and yes she may be carrying his child but innocent until proven guilty sounds like she is taking advantage of his good nature hope it works out it usually does for the better x
2006-11-25 08:29:34 · answer #1 · answered by sarah 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
May I ask your ages?
Well... to begin with... i would definitely tell him not to pay a thing until he is court ordered to take a paternity test. The other side will have to pay for the test... rather than him... cause they are not cheap. That will prove it if it is or is not his child. Then he can pay and support financially. As for emotionally... that is a different story.
I was married for 5 years when I got a letter in the mail stating my husband was being named as the father of a 13 year old child. The numbers kinda added up, but even before this came up, he told me she was quite the nypho. The state of Kansas paid for the paternity test..... and come to find out it was not his child. So my husband was only out a little of his time and a long talk with me.... :).
I hope your relationship is strong... because it is going to take everything you have to stay together. She may try to lure him back.... using the child as a pawn. And if it is his...you need to talk to him and see what he plans to do. Does he intend to go back..... just support financially..... or relinquish parental rights. How are you going to handle being the "step" if it is his and he choses to keep in contact. there is more to be considered than just the surface issues too.
I would recommend getting some counceling during this difficult time. Best of luck to you.
2006-11-25 08:25:20 · answer #2 · answered by TAZZLOVER8 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all as soon as that child is born he needs to get a dna done to make sure its his.. not only paying money for someone elses child would be bad but what about the bond they share just so 3 yrs from now the mom can decide that some other guy is the dad? 2nd as far as you feeling like the outsider you know the truth and thats all that counts... you need to decide if this is what you want for the rest of your life you were not there and didnt make this choice. so if you dont thinnk you can handle being a step mom and the constent ups and downs with this girl then back out now i wouldnt blame you thats alot to ask a woman to deal with.... but if you choose to stay and the baby is proven to be his then all 3 of you must think of that child first no matter how you feel about each other....
2006-11-25 08:21:12 · answer #3 · answered by momoftwobestkids 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something not right in this story
You said that you're dating him for a fairly long time yet his ex is pregnant for him......it either he was cheating on you with her because the numbers not adding up......
Try getting to the bottom of it.....
When the child is born go get a DNA test done and then you have facts and make a decision then
2006-11-25 08:21:30 · answer #4 · answered by tutsie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think when the baby is born, your boyfriend, baby, and the Mom should have DNA testing. He may not be the Father, and that would be unfair to him, and to the real Dad. Good luck ~~
2006-11-25 08:17:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There really needs to be a paternity test involved here... sounds like alot of heartache. I'm sorry hon.
2006-11-25 08:16:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
heavily? you pick a toy? nicely i assume women have their desires besides. Kudos on being open approximately it. You earned my admire. anyhow, bypass with the youngster and run to the save and get your self a pair of batteries to apply day after today. I doubt that this is that undesirable which you may require the use of your toy this nighttime.
2016-10-13 02:34:11 · answer #7 · answered by balikos 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs a dna test to prove the baby is his. If it is, well then he is responsible for that child no matter who else he is with.
2006-11-25 08:16:42 · answer #8 · answered by visionsofforever 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
girl if he loves u he will say can u help me in this time of need and marry him and then when the baby older u and you husband can have some mommy and daddy time if u know what i mean
2006-11-25 08:17:38 · answer #9 · answered by WorldOfWarcraftGamerandLover 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
aww i'm so sorry, r u sure that he's the dad?
2006-11-25 08:17:54 · answer #10 · answered by dancing_diva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋