Question about "choice?"?

Question

I have noticed a lot of questions on here from owmen who are pregnant and don't want the child. Why is it that when considering choices, a lot of women only consider abortion or having the child then raising it? Are there really that many women that know nothing about adoption? What do you think?

that was supossed to say "women." Sorry for the typo.

Answer 1

Being adopted myself I think it's the best thing a person who does not want a child could do. There are so many loving couples out there who cannot have children and wait years on a list just for a child. Why would you kill something instead of carry it when you could really just deal with being pregnant for 9 months of your life and give it up for adoption. There are private agencies where you can even choose the couple you want to give your baby to (that's what was done with me). I have actually met both my biological parents. I'm 24 and met my biological mother 6 years ago. As it turns out she lives in the nearest big city and we even knew the same people (I hung with an older crowd).

My biological mother was only 16 when she had me. She could have easily chosen abortion, and choosing that I would have no lived some amazing 24 years, met incredible people, helped people who needed help. It's like taking a piece of the puzzle out of the big puzzle of life...

If anyone would like to talk to me about adoption my email address is my user name @ yahoo.com

Answer 2

I think that many mothers consider adoption to be giving up, even though it's what is best for your child.

My take is that women consider abortion because it's a quick fix, but if that's not her choice, why give it away? You go through so much labor, why not keep the baby? It's a selfish and emotionally driven response to being pregnant.

I think there is a time in every mother's life when she has to look at her baby and ask herself, "can I give this child the life she deserves?" It's not about the mother once the baby is born--I'm sure she has lots of room to love the child. Unforunately, a child needs more than just love.

If the answer is no, give the baby up for adoption--it's not a sin. I think many mothers think that it means they will regret it later. No one seems to know about open adoptions anymore. I wish people would listen more and consider adoption instead of just whisking it under the rug.

Answer 3

When a woman gets pregnant by 'suprise' (as though there were such a thing... like having any kind of sex could result in something other than a child) the very act of her even 'considering' anything is to me selfish.

What is there to consider? Your own life, your own desires, your own wants, your own needs. In most cases the needs and life of the child are barely if at all considered.

A lot of women in that case dont consider adoption because they still would have to carry the child, they still would have to give birth, and then they would have to deal with the emotional issues of giving it up for adoption. Something most women dont want to put themselves through, so its easier to put the child to death than for them to suffer.

Sex results in babies. For every woman on birth control for a year, 1 in 100 will become pregnant. 1 in 100. Thats a lot of women. And thats the pill. The rate is higher for condoms and other forms of birth control. Even sterilization (short of cateration or removing the ovaries and uterus) can result in a pregnancy at some point. Its what sex is for.

People dont see it that way. They see it as their right to do whatever they want, create babies, and rid themselves of them so they can be happy and feel good.

Its just selfish. I miscarried at 6-8 weeks, I barely knew i was pregnant, but it still was devistating. I cant imagine willfully killing the child that was created, no matter how it was created.

Ive been molested, and probably raped (I was a child and didnt tell anyone, although I know i was given pills and cant remember what happened for days), It was hell, but if something had happened, and I had gotten pregnant, theres no way i would have killed the baby. Ever.

As to your question... I dont think women really consider it a viable option to put their child up for adoption, because so many dont want to give birth in the first place, or be bothered with the knowledge that they have a love child floating around some where.

Answer 4

How come when people bring up choices, they always throw out adoption without stopping to think the process completely throught?

There's "tons of people on waiting lists waiting to have a baby!!!!!!"
Okay, then. I say there are millions of children in the system already. Give them homes. White, healthy, newborn children are not the only viable options. I think if these potential adopted parents lowered their standards, many more children would have homes instead of becoming wards of the state until they're 18 and then thrown out on the street.

If I were to get pregnant, I would have an abortion in a heartbeat. I don't want to overpopulate the world even more, clog up the system even more, or carry an unwanted child.

Answer 5

Yes, I've noticed this on Y!A and in the "real world." It's funny people preach choice--but really most woman only see two options; abortion or keeping the child, and unfortunately, sometimes only one option; abortion.

As you know I am pro-choice by all means that does not make me "pro" or "for" abortion. I worked at a pregnancy help center for a year helping woman and teens decided what to do. I believe being pro-choice is about explaining options and trying not to lean on one end of things. I think woman need to know all options; abortion, adoption, and keeping the child. With all of the options they need to know the psychological, financial (as for keeping the child, paying for an abortion, or money received for adoption), medical (procedure in the case of abortion), legal (as far as rights go with both adoption/abortion), general health, and spiritual factors in whatever decision they choose.

I’m all for overall understanding of all options out there. I feel given the proper knowledge of abortion most potential parents wouldn’t chose that option. I think once a person knows every little detail of each option--remember not sugarcoating it either--they are most likely to choose adoption. Whatever their decision proper guidance thereafter is a needed thing.

I think education frees people. Given the proper tools and resources to make an educated decision I don’t know how someone would choose abortion. I feel the high abortion rates in the US are due to a misinformed society.

Personally, I would never have an abortion. I don't know how I would live giving my son/daughter up for adoption but if need be I would do it.

Answer 6

Well' I think adoption is pretty tough for some women.It must be hard to carry a baby and give birth and then give it to someone else. Maybe it's easier for them if the baby doesn't exist at all. I don't know, I guess it depends on the woman.

Answer 7

Adoption is the way to go, I think.
It let's your precious baby live with more than you could give, right?
I'm for adoption 100%!

Answer 8

i agree.........yes, they know about adoption..one girl told me that she wasnt going to carry a child for nine months then give it to someone else, yet she didnt want to raise it, so therefore she was gonna have an abortion. if that isnt selfish i dont know what is...stop opening your legs if you dont want to face the repercussions of your actions. i hate how some look at a child as a burden instead of the blessings that they are. it irritates me to no end..as if that child asked to be conceived

Answer 9

Adoption is great but is a harder choice to make. It's not as cut and dry as you think.

Answer 10

i think adoption is a great thing, and when i see questions about abortion thats my 1st response