My boyfriend and haven't had sex yet, last night we've talked about it he said that his fantasy is to hurt me a little , he said that seeing me crying is a turn on ! He says he wants that to feel almost like a rape!.. He freaked the hell out of me when he said that he loved to hurt me and see me crying during sex ..WHERE DO THESE THOUGHTS COME FROM ????.IS THERE ANY GUY WHO KNOWS BY CHANCE WHY IT IS A TURN ON ? (( BTW MY BOYFRIEND IS NOT VIOLENT AT ALL HE IS VERY SWEET ))
2006-11-24 23:46:03 · 36 answers · asked by leave me alone 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
why do people exagerrate ??
I said he's not violent and when he said he loved to see me crying a little bit or hurt me a little I asked him do you like to actually hurt he said no but I like to feel like I'm taking charge of it
2006-11-25 00:06:05 · update #1
ok come on people don't exagerrate we've been together for years and he's reday to wait for after marriage to have sex with me don't tell me he don't love me !
2006-11-25 01:11:17 · update #2
you can fake that, crying like a acting, try that
:> peace
.
2006-11-28 17:46:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
He is probably just a sadist.... Like my girl. It's fine for us because I am a masochist (big smile) and she knows my limit and never really hurts me. She never leaves marks, well except from her mouth (bigger smile). Its something you never know until you try, but most people just don't get it. If you are not cool with this, tell him. I suggest that the two of you talk about what kind of sex you both like way before having sex so it turns out better for the both of you when you do. Be careful though, because many of the violent ones never seem violent at all at first.
2016-05-23 01:00:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM GIRL D:< if he's turned on because you're hurt it's so totally wrong!! that's sexual harrasement, he can't truely love you at ALL!!! I'm really dead serious!! He could most probably be putting on a show to lure you into his bed just because he wants to have sex.
But then i could be wrong. Maybe he meant it as a joke, get into the same converstation and see if you pick up on that again. If so even if you "love" him it's best to walk. IT'S AGANIST THE LAW he can't hurt you...THAT'S RAPE!!! RAPE IS AGANIST THE LAW!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-01 17:59:47 · answer #3 · answered by Kakage K 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok first of all this is really weird, but alot of guys do fantasize about kinda hurting a girl while having sex, it gives them the sense of being in control (this is why alot of guys turn to s&m which involves bondage and most of the time hurting their partner)... but him saying that he wants it to be like a rape really freaks me out, even if your boyfriend may seem sweet if he's fantasizing about these kinds of thing then he subconciously wants to hurt you during intercourse... and that is not right, sex is suppose to be very intimate and special, not hurting one another... so in a shorter explantion... your boyfriend's a freak, i'd honestly be careful....
and another thing, i had a boyfriend once who displayed no signs of violence... he was the sweetest guy i had ever met, and one night i didn't want to keep plans we had made, he flipped out and hit me.... so no matter how sweet they seem don't let your guard down... i'd be really careful, bc who's to say that if you do get into the position to have sex and you say no that he won't rape you? not trying to scare you just want to you wake up and don't let the guard down
2006-11-25 00:07:10 · answer #4 · answered by lizlarae 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love has nothing to do w/ this. Men can love you to death but still be sadist.
Personally, sweetie, I would be VERY uncomfortable in your situation. I would not want to have sex with this man. I would want to break the relationship. because this could spill over into every-day, and abusive relationships are hard to break after the abuse starts.
If you are ok w/ him HURTING YOU, then i have nothing left to say. ultimately, its your desicion.
if you must keep him, at least tell him that you dont want to be hurt. if he complies, then good for you!
good luck.
2006-12-02 12:59:46 · answer #5 · answered by Neha S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes my husband was like this...although he never forced me ...but he too said that he had this strange liking to see people in trouble and then help them....when he tried anal on for the first time...I cried in pain begged him to stop...and I could see that he was really liking that...although he didn't force me when I told him stop.
I think one of the guys already said that...that its like they feel more manly when they have total control over a female...and they are protecting her...
He was very possesive and protective of me from others...but wanted complete control over me...
I was really scared of him too...I thought he is mentally sick...but he was very caring too...
till date I'm confused how strange human behavior can be...
2006-11-25 00:10:04 · answer #6 · answered by 28March2007 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he wants it to seem like a rape, inform him that you can make it seem a WHOLE lot more realistic by putting him in jail afterwards. This man does not love you. NOT AT ALL. No man that was truly in love wants to hurt that woman and vice versa. I think you need to leave.
2006-11-24 23:52:46 · answer #7 · answered by Rebecca M 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
that feels sick to me, hurt you a little bit and watch you crying???during sex??? I only see this in Japanese AV where the louder that gal crys,more exciting that ****** be...
but it's such a large world out there, there definitely are people like that.
2006-11-24 23:55:51 · answer #8 · answered by Mykroy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who many red flags do you need to see before getting the point? There's no such thing as sweet but has a violent side.The man is sick.
2006-11-24 23:51:09 · answer #9 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My boyfriend says it's a way of showing dominance. He said it's hard to explain for a guy.
2006-11-26 07:47:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think, sex must do in softly. Your boyfriend must learn what is the meaning and how of curtsy even he is very sweet just like you said!
2006-11-25 00:06:57 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋