what is it like, good experience and have you gone on to have a better relationship with clear boundaries?
2006-11-24 21:31:29 · 4 answers · asked by oceanwaves 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Im a proper mediation centre with toys about a newborn (which my ex has no experience off)
My ex is abusive to it's that or nothing!
I
2006-11-24 21:47:53 · update #1
sorry what i mean't to say is these are mediation centres with trained staff and counciling.
Im pregnant and the baby is nearly here, he will have to see the baby like this or no other way as his family are not talking to him and neither are mine, because he is abusive and a bully. A simple hello and goodbye will be twisted and reduce me to tears.
2006-11-24 21:50:48 · update #2
well 1st of all i'm sorry to hear this i have a smilar prob! if it was me again i wouldnt put his name on the birth certificate as this gives him legal rights! and when the baby is first born i dont think its a good idea to be taking your baby to a contact centre get to know your baby first and bring it up the best you can on ya own its stressful for children to go to these centre i know thro experiance and also know that a tiny baby needs its mummy and needs to settle into the world before going to a contact centre! this was told to me by CAB and i agree!
very best of look take care
2006-11-25 09:07:38 · answer #1 · answered by lillypops 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have done the whole mediation contact centre thing. Whilst at the contact centre it was all his best behaviour. I gathered maybe he had changed but they are watched there so the manipulative bullies know how to work it. My ex began collecting my son from home. That's where he started working on me. They forget all the abuse tell you, it's your fault and that your face fell on their hand etc. Things carried on for a year i really did try, you have to give it a go for your child's sake. Like you say they can manage to twist a simple hello or goodbye. In the end it was the last straw. When you find out you have been lied to for certain trust dies! How can you let them take the most precious person from you when you don't trust them and they are abusive towards you. I don't mean to put a dampener on it. Please do try! Make sure you keep a diary of everything though
2006-11-25 08:51:30 · answer #2 · answered by itgirl23 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My friend tried mediation with her ex but he was also a bully and a control freak so she always seemed to come out of it feeling crappy. They ended up going to court and doing everything that way because he was being unreasonable. Everything went her way in the end because she was genuinely trying to do the best for their daughter and he was just trying to score points. I think mediation only works when the people involved really want to resolve something and not use it to control the other person.
Good luck with your pregnancy and I honestly hope you manage to find a solution xx
2006-11-25 08:17:34 · answer #3 · answered by Trillyp 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a child of divorced parents, my parents tried this at first. It was upsetting to me. My mom would drop me off at my grandma's house, and my dad would pick me up. You don't have to like your ex, but you should respect them and get along for the child(ren). You don't have to talk to them, just a simple hello and goodbye will do. Your child(ren) is going through a rough time right now too, and you should be as civil as possible to one another to make it less painful for him/her.
2006-11-25 05:43:52 · answer #4 · answered by holliexoxo88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋