my soon to be wife / fiancé is a resident alien, we've been dating for almost 2 years, I can see her as my wife and things are going well... she'll need to leave the US in about 8 months if we aren’t married... now, what I was thinking is that we go ahead and get married but make it just "legal" like with a prenuptial agreement to keep our assets separate... no big ceremony because we both live in Hawaii with parents all over the world. This would be for convenience and would be treated like an engagement mentally... and then when we relocate in a year or so we would have a ceremony and have the families come when its easier... I know it’s not traditional and I don’t want to cheapen the experience… but we love each other and want to make this an easy transition, and under the circumstances this feels ok... any suggestions on how to make it go smoothly? Legal advice? Just don’t want to rush in, but I still want us to stay together. Thanks...
2006-11-24 20:23:23 · 5 answers · asked by Michael C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If you already know you are going to marry her, make it legitimate. Let this be the special life altering thing that is truly is (no matter what you call it) make her feel special and loved, and let her step up to the plate as your wife and life partner. You WILL cheapen it by calling it by another name.
2006-11-25 06:02:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-17 12:27:44 · answer #2 · answered by corridoni 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure I agree but this has to do with my up-bringing and I do not want to push that on you. In my opinion, if both of your parents can make it to Hawaii just have the wedding for good along with the pre-nup and then it is legal and you don't have to do this twice. Like I said this is only my opinion but it seems like 2 years is a good amount of time to spend in a relationship and be engaged before getting married. I do not know all the details of why you wouldn't get married now anyway so forgive me if this is not helpful.
2006-11-25 06:07:01 · answer #3 · answered by CGS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are cheapening the experience.
If that is what you want, that's fine, but why not just do it right the first time.
I'm sure your families would love an excuses to come to Hawaii. Have a meaningful ceremony, and spend time with your parents.
That's all you really need for a "real wedding".
2006-11-25 13:05:00 · answer #4 · answered by ee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to ask yourself, why not just set a date for six months from now and have the wedding? What's your hesitation? You've known her long enough, why not? If you're concerned about your assets, you really do need a pre-nup. People can certainly come in from all over the world for a wedding: I've seen it done. You have enough time to plan a nice wedding. You've known her long enough to do it?
If you really want to just get married now and have a reception later, then you have to really do it, not just mentally consider it an engagement. And then make it just a reception later, or have it be the "religious" wedding later, but, really, why not just do it all at once?
2006-11-24 21:28:34 · answer #5 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋