HOW DO i build up confidence when so many have belittled me bullied me or shouteed me down?

Question

i also get used and taking advantage of any tips

Answer 1

The quikest way is to stand up to anyone trying to take advantage of you. Stand up for yourself and do not allow anyone to walk on you. Learn to say NO. And do not be afraid to smack someone that won't take No for an answer. Please only resort to violence as a last resort though.

Answer 2

be practical, don't try to use anything to off set those people they are this way, all people have many problems but what they don't need is a i told you so , when you have the strength to handle all this crap and still ask for help you have true grit and that is about all they ever said about woman as a battle scared infighter in life's Little game of surviving. i don't like the john Wayne thing about true grit but hard to stop some people who are addicted to being a punisher and a advise giver some can't stop and leave somebody alone. as a biker it is tough and lonely out there for twenty years we road and listen to America we heard saying that if you can't say nothing nice don't say anything at all... well this got up dated it the good guys wear black to where if you want to help someone that might even mean leaving them alone.. so you could ask the @ss holes to c that you got a good heart and they will not stop cause you won't stay down, so pushing u up is what you need start being somewhere else when you know you should be just to stay out of harms way

Answer 3

I know this feeling...I am generally very quiet, and I used to be quite shy. do you have the opportunity to study the behavior of those who harass you? If you do, study them. You don't want to be like them, since they're jerks, but notice in what way they are jerks and what they hope to get out of hassling you. Get some insight into who they are and why they do what they do.

When I look back on the girls who made my life as miserable as they could in high school, I can see that they were, in fact, life's losers. They had nothing to offer anyone but misery.

If/when you can see these people for who they are, I think that they will have much less impact on you, no matter what they say or do, because they are actually irrelevant. They can't really be a friend or be positive in any action.

when you reflect on who they are and who you are, you get confidence by knowing that motives are good and seeing all the positive things you do in the world.

Answer 4

Hi Flower, I was bullied at school and very put upon, im now 38 with five sons and can advise this, anyone who bullies you is very likely to be a person who is being bullied by someone else, Confidence can be acheived by setting small but positive goals, only do what you feel you can cope with, and if anyone shouts at you simply and calmly tell them that they are the ones with the problem, people that are in control of thier emotions genrally have no need to shout. all the best from JJ

Answer 5

Confidence builds with time. Find people you trust and make sure they earn your trust. Dont be afraid of sticking up for your self. Im sorry to tell you, but only reason you can get taken advantage of is when you let them. Life can be hard sometimes i know. You have to keep your head up. Join some kinda club that intrests you.(this way you will have some people there that think like you)

it would be better for you to find someone you already trust but
if u need someone to talk 2 nexusmoon@yah....

Answer 6

People behave like this for a variety of reasons. Regardless of those reasons it is best to look after yourself, and this means being assertive but not offensive in return. Hence just look upon those who appear uncivilised as being just that. Don't feel hurt or scarred when something happens, just stay calm and work out if the criticisms were justified, if not then stand back and watch the stupid people show how backward they really are.

Answer 7

Wake up every morning, look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself something good about yourself or something nice you are going to do for yourself that day then do it. Building confidence is a process, not a transcendence into another state of being. Just stick with it and it gets easy to do after even just a little practice. You can do it!

Answer 8

When in a position where I have found myself being belittled,bullied or shouted down I found the quickest way to gain respect and boost my confidence was to remove my collapsable ice pick from my pocket.With one swift freeflowing movement insert the pick into the aggressors head/face or upper body and then ask them if they would like to rephrase what they have just said or done.You will probably find the aggressor has a sudden change of heart of how they feel about you as will anyone who is looking on.You will feel your confidence flowing however don't spend too much time gloating as a mere two minutes could mean the difference between you being tucked up warmly in bed with a self satisfying smile or being incarcarated at her majesties pleasure.I hope this helps.

Answer 9

(1) Everyday tell yourself you are strong and can do anything and can overcome those people who have put you down.

(2) Think really highly of yourself and hold your chin up.

(3) Believe you are a better person then they are.

(4) Tell yourself they arent worth your time/energy.

(5) When someone tries to belittle you or puts you down in any way, wave at them and smile and it will send a "I dont freakin care what you have to say about me" message to them.

I have overcome them from grade school and I believe I am a much better person. I did it just by telling myself they arent worth my time and energy. I also put myself on a higher type of scale then they are because you have to stoop pretty low to make fun/belittle someone. And I kept telling myself Im better then that. Eventually, over about 1 - 1/2 yrs I was fine and now I dont really care what anyone has to say about me. When someone makes fun of me or puts me down I smile and wave..It pisses them off and makes you happy. You can try that too!

If you need anymore assistance or help I will be more then happy to help. I know how sucky it is to feel alone on the issue and I am completely willing to hold out my hand if you need help.

Just IM me.. Sn = imxnoxrockstar

P.S. Im still trying to fix the situation of being taken advantage of, but so far Ive learned to stand up for yourself and just say "No" It's hard, I know..Im still working on it. But if you work hard enough you'll eventually get stronger day by day!

Good luck! and remember if you need anymore advice..feel free to IM me.

Answer 10

Self Confidence can Only Come from within!
A Crushed Soul and Self Image can Be Repaired!
Get out there!
Hold Your head HIGH!
Ignore those that Pass Judgment and be-Little YOU!
You are worth More than Other Peoples Thoughts about YOU!

Answer 11

Hi There Flower,Sorry to hear that you are getting such a hard time.There are lots of cruel and vindictive people out there,and it sounds like you are meeting most of them!! Firstly,you need to work on your self esteem.As a human being you are unique and very special,and you need to beleive that.Secondly,its a known fact that bullies and people who belittle others,are insecure and feel bad about themselves.The only way for them to be able to feel reasonable,is to cover their feelings of inadequacy by giving others a hard time.Consider all the good and positive things you like about yourself,(I'm sure there are many!!!),and build on that.Ignore those who are rude to you,and treat them with the pity they deserve,they have the problem ,not you.Rise above this,and continue to be the nice person that you obviously are!!! Take care,and be happy,all the very best,Rob.