Please help me out! I am going to have triplets in 8 months! Can any mothers help me out and give me some tips! I have so many questions! This is my first time having a child and I am NERVOUS! The worst part is that I am only 19 and I have no steady boyfriend! My mom knows but she's so upset that I had sex with a guy I hardly knew and now having his 3 babies, she won't even look at me! I spend all my time up here in my room and the only time I ever go downstairs is to get food and when I go somewhere or come back. I just don't know what to do about the babies, or my mom, or the guy who did this to me. Nothing makes sense anymore! I'm going into an emotional breakdown here and I don't have anyone to love! PLEASE help me! I can't stand the horror of being a single mom of three kids, on my own, with a job, and not having a mom or dad (divorce) to go to for help! PLEASE!!!!
2006-11-24 18:03:26 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
View my 360 page to see my whole avatar! It looks just like I will soon! :(
2006-11-24 18:05:33 · update #1
I'M SORRY, I MEANT TO SAY 7 1/2 MONTHS AWAY FROM BIRTH. SORRY!
2006-11-24 18:58:19 · update #2
Hi there...calm down.....take a deep breath...
I am 24 and just had identical twin boys....My mothers friend has 4 yr old quadruplets and a 7 year old!!!....I found out I was having them at 7 weeks, you are pregant for 40, so yes she could've found out already!
FIRST, do you have myspace?...there are groups on there like moms of twins/triplets, mothers of multiples, etc....Why don't you try to get on there. There are many more mothers who will be able to give you first hand advice, referalls, etc.
Please try that...You will be shocked at the amount of knowledge and assistance ACTUAL mothers of multiples can be.
SECOND, if you want to keep your triplets there is assistance out there. Have you talked tried to get a hold of WIC? They will consider you a family of 4 already (lol) and your assitance will be based on that, so if your not working, and not getting anyone elses help, you will get the max. B/c you need to be eating more and healthy, you need to be able to talk to someone, b/c it is difficult carrying mulitples to a healthy gestational period. I did "all the right" things and my twins still came prematurely....So anyways, WIC will get you nutritional counseling, food assistance and will get you connected with your local welfare office to get you financial assistance (if you qualify), health insurance, etc.
I would love to talk to you more!!! You can get a hold of me on myspace, search my name Carriss and I can help you with support groups and how to get you started in the right direction...please do get a hold of me, my profile is private, just write me and we can get in touch!!
Keep your head up :)
2006-11-25 01:31:21 · answer #1 · answered by Carriss P 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Here is my email we can talk chardeselms@yahoo.com .
It amases me you are pregnant with triplets with out fertility. WOW. My husband and I have been tring and are unable.
Anyway you should not have to live like that. Your mom needs to be more understanding. Yes you made a mistake, but she needs to support you. You have got to be under alot of stress. The only you will make it on your own is going and getting state help. What state are you in?
It is not healthy for you or those babies to be under so much stress. You do have options out there if you want to use them. PLEASE do not get an abortion. You can use adoption. There are many people that want babies. Dont get mad that was only a suggestion.
Contact me and we can talk. I also have messanger.
2006-11-25 04:17:15 · answer #2 · answered by Char 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I say congratulations!! You'll be a wonderful, strong independant mother.. Keep that in mind! and tell yourself that constantly..
Next- Find a kind way to tell your mom and dad to get over themselves and help you out. They may be disapointed but that doesn't change the situation you're in or the fact that you need them more today then probably ever. Just let them know that ( you love them and need them) Even stone ppl will understand
I've never had 3 kids at the same time.. But you will grow to be your childern's hero. Do your best and keep your head up. Its not about you-- its your children. Make your best dicisions... they are crucial
Also-- the guy. let him know what is going on- he may want to be part
If not. screw him!!! If he didn't know you and slept with you (and visaversa) that night was a one night stand.. you don't want anything to do with him and nor he with you. Don't hold him to you- it'll make both your lives miserable...
Don't forget there is always adoption- if you decide to bless someone else with the fruit of your womb. Remember these babies deserve lives full of love- if you can't commit to a lifetime of love for 3 maybe you should give them to someone you can and is ready to have that available for your babies. Your babies don't deserve stress or punishment for a one night mistake. And they can feel that in womb as well
Good luck
2006-11-25 02:31:37 · answer #3 · answered by linsey5130 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
How can u know u r having triplets in the first month? A sonogram isn't normally done till much later in the pregnancy??
But, IF this is really the case, pls calm down n realize that ur mom will come around soon. This is all new to u guys rt now. If it continues to b bad tho, pls adopt those babies out...DO NOT ABORT..u will not forgive urself later on. They deserve to live. Live up to ur mistake n make the sacrifice for them. Ask ur Dr. for guidance to places that can help u in all the ways u will need it. Ur not the first this has happened to, u CAN do this!
Good Luck!
2006-11-25 02:22:33 · answer #4 · answered by •♦๑•TxRose•♦๑• 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Ok, calm down girlfriend. You are not alone. Having kids is not a terminal disease, and it is not the end of the world. And at least you are an adult and have a high school diploma or G.E.D, so it's not like you are a little teenage girl who won't see graduation for several years. I have 6 kids, the last two were twins. Being pregnant means having to think and care for yourself and looking outside of yourself to take care of your babies. Do the right thing, eat good, get lots of rest, drink lots of water, see your Dr. regularly, take your pre-natal vitamins ('cuz those babies will suck every vitamin right out of you, if I didn't take mine every day when I was pregnant with the twins I got really weak and could hardly get out of bed) and do NOT mope around the house. Get some fresh air, it'll do your morning sickness good. You can make yourself sick by stressing yourself out so bad, and that'll hurt your babies. Not every woman gets to experience what we've gone through, so buck up baby, it's going to be allright!! As a mom, I would be upset if I found out that my girls were having sex and got pregnant out of wedlock, but I would be there for them, and I would help them out in anyway that I could. Your mom must be in shock, ask her to help you in something really easy for her to do or something that wouldn't take alot of time, and see how she reacts to that. Maybe she is just waiting for you to ask for help. Get her involved, have her take you out shopping for baby/maternity stuff, ask her advice on baby/maternity stuff what you'll need how much you will need etc., have her take you to the Dr. office, and definately have her be there when you have your ultrasound. She'll be so astounded, (and so will you) that you both will look at this from a whole different light. And as far as the letters from DW and RoughRide, giving you advice on aborting your babies, what do they know? DO NOT KILL YOUR BABIES!! If you have to consider adoption. My girlfriend has 7 kids, the last 5 are adopted and they travel all around the world, and they love those kids as if they are their own, which they are, but you know what I mean. And one of those guys said that the babies really aren't anything right now, he is sadly mistaken. A baby's heart beats at 18 days, a babies brain has neurological activity at 45 days. At 12 weeks all of the organs and everything is there, the baby only needs time, love, and nurishment to grow. Your babies are human babies, not blobs. It is against the law to destroy an eagles' egg even if it was just laid. Why? Because they know that there is a baby eagle inside. Why do we treat our children less? Being a single mom is not a horror, it will be hard, but it is not impossible. And you will have joy like you have never had when you hold your babies in your arms for the first time. Good luck and keep us posted.
2006-11-25 03:11:20 · answer #5 · answered by Faith 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Once I read your mom is mad coz you had sex I had to stop...I'm assuming she knows your having triplets and refuses to face/deal w/ that.....you are really on your own...if moms worried about you having sex when there's 3 kids on the way moms pretty much blown her mind out for all practical purposes...no help there...your going to need to file for assistance...some way or another...if your under moms roof then they prolly won't give it to you...your gonna need to find day care and go to school/work somehow...and finding a responsible adult who doesn't drink/use drugs may be a good option...maybe someone a few older than you...you have to sacrifice and make some serious life altering decisions here if your to offset the negative impact of this and see it through to the best possible conclusion...even with that in mind I still feel the need to congratulate you on a unique event....stay strong...heart and mind....
2006-11-25 02:13:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Wow is the only word that comes to my mind. Umm... wow. Try to establish some kind of relationship with the father of the triplets. He needs to be there because this is half his responsibility also. As far as your mom and dad goes, try talking to them. Tell them that you made a mistake and now you have to deal with it, but would you be very appreciative if they could help you through this.
2006-11-25 03:17:00 · answer #7 · answered by Rebecca M 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Dude! I feel for you.
That is one of the things I wrote about in my book for people under 30.
The choice you make now will determine the rest of your life.
Have you given abortion any thought? you need to. It'll be hard on you for a few month but you'll be good again and this time you won't ruin your own life.
If you don't decide to do so then you need to MAKE that kid that got you pregnant man up and live up to the responsibility. The courts will take his balls and make him work for the rest of his life to take care of you and your kids.
BUT PLEASE! don't just blame it on him. YOU were there too. Unless it was rape! In which case you should call the police and report him NOW!
Seriously though, I would definitely consider abortion, at this stage there is not much to speak of in your belly.
2006-11-25 02:08:54 · answer #8 · answered by DW 2 · 3⤊ 3⤋
wow what can i say try to find a steady relationship with some guy. but most importanly talk to your parents, try to capture the positive points of having 3 children and show them ( ex. your mom will have 3 loving grandchildren). oh yeah and dont just sit in your room, go out and have some fun after all it is going to be hard for u later...
2006-11-25 02:07:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
You DO have someone to love, sweetie! You have yourself and those babies! I know it's hard, but try not to let it get to you! Tell your mother that she needs to accept you as you are because you need her right now. As for the guy who "did this to you", 2 words--CHILD SUPPORT! You're going to need it with 3 babies. Does he even know? Good luck with everything.
2006-11-25 02:08:24 · answer #10 · answered by wifeofasexyairman 1 · 1⤊ 3⤋