So today I'm off from work and I get a call doing Christmas shopping, turns out my planed wonderful dinner for two by the fireplace and my other activates canceled because his friend wants a ride to the capitol where a boxing contest is being held.
Grinding my teeth, I said fine, do what you want to. He then suggest brining me, I remind him I'm working tomorrow (Saturday). Turns out latter they decided not to do the whole boxing thing and then my boyfriend calls feeling guilty, saying maybe we could go out, it's too late by then and I can hear his friend drunk in the back ground being retarded.
He then calls me over and over (my boyfriend) within two hours time, i can tell he knows I’m upset for canceling our plans, but he's drinking with his friend, this guy has caused my boyfriend time and money, in 1 weeks time my boyfriend spent 200 on booze and drives him places!
Who Am I to be mad at, my boyfriend for doing everything for a leach or the friend whose a grown man?
2006-11-24 18:02:08 · 11 answers · asked by Juleette 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What a totally bogus kick in the teeth. Of all the low down rotten disrespect. It's not a question of who to be mad at as the anger and resentment seething inside you is plenty for the both of them. You have every right to be mad at both of those two miscreants. Your first reaction would be that you probably would like to ring both of their necks and I don't blame you. This is all so terribly sad.
Anger aside you should reevaluate your relationship with with this so called "boyfriend". He seems very controlled by that idiot rat-friend of his. Him you can write off as a bad influence, a clot headed loser who doesn't even deserve the right time of day.
But your boyfriend. Because of the money spent on the booze pay special attention to his use of alcohol. This should serve as a warning to any future interaction with him. You will never have any positive relationship with a drunk. Take some time for yourself and get your feelings sorted out even if it means not seeing him for a while. You may need a break from him. He really needs to make some kind of a decision as to how he feels about being with you. Guilt or no guilt this little escapade of his may illustrate his true feelings.
2006-11-24 20:43:53 · answer #1 · answered by quantumview 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BOTH.
Your boyfriend is old enough that he can make his own decisions, he may be influenced by his friend but he still chooses to allow himself to be influenced. This friend obviously is trying to jeopardize your relationship. Perhaps he is afraid he is going to lose his friend or is jealous because he isn't in a relationship.
Neither one of them is acting responsible. Be clear that you were upset and be open and honest about your feelings. Don't attack his friend or your boyfriend will rush to his friends defense even if he knows he is wrong. Instead say it really hurt me when...... I am worried about the amount of time & money your spending drinking...... etc. I spent a lot of time planning an evening together and I felt you didn't appreciate the work I put into our plans and that spending the time together wasn't as important to you... Something along those lines.
If you don't establish some boundries now of what you will and won't put up with you could be in for a lot more of these incidents. Guys can't read your mind so when you say 'ok' and it's NOT they get confused. I think they just aren't as good at reading underlying feelings.
Good luck! The whole situation sounds really frustrating!
2006-11-25 02:22:22 · answer #2 · answered by Wicked Good 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well as long as you are in this relationship with him, you'll also be involved with his "leach" friend. He won't dump his friend for you. So either except it as it is or move on. It sounds to me like your boyfriend is also immature with the drinking and making unwise choices. Do you really want this in your life? Sometimes what seems like "love" in the beginning of a relationship, shows it's really colors with time.
2006-11-25 02:07:43 · answer #3 · answered by beautyofthesea 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be mad at yourself for wasting your time on a guy (as your boyfriend) who doesn't know how to have his own life, doing his own thing, and actually thinks before he acts.
So stop sitting there and asking who am I to be mad at.
It's you and only you can make the decision for your own good.
2006-11-25 02:07:35 · answer #4 · answered by James 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a talk w'your man and tell him that when you make plans, this means just that plans.and tell him that u were not to happy w/his action's. this way he'll think twice before doing this again.about the booze, he is an adult so if he want's to blow money getting his liver damage then let it be.
2006-11-25 02:08:27 · answer #5 · answered by dounut 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The friend you are to be really mad at the boyfriend a little but dont be to hard on the boyfriend whoever be superhard on his friend the leech lol
2006-11-25 02:04:45 · answer #6 · answered by Nightchild 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your BF's friend can't make him do anything. He a big boy and he made the decision. IF your going to be mad at anyone it's the BF you should be mad at.
2006-11-25 02:06:51 · answer #7 · answered by sharpeilvr 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You shouldnt b mad at that.Just enjoy goin Christmas shopping.Dont b mad n if dat situation comes up just ignore it.Have a wonderful holiday
2006-11-25 02:07:15 · answer #8 · answered by Gizzi 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Your boyfriend, unless the guy has a gun and is forcing him to do these things.
2006-11-25 02:04:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
your boyfriend he is the one willing to give up a romantic night with you to give his friend a ride...if he commits to something his friend shouldnt be able to talk him out of it
2006-11-25 02:07:23 · answer #10 · answered by yea boy1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋