guys and girls plz! help. been rough relationship lately but talkd to him bout it. l8r found out he was high!?

Question

I hav a bf, we went out for 6 mos & then he wantd to take a break -we were disagreeing a lot, I felt like he didnt care bout me & he said I didn't share my feelings, talk enuf & I was no fun to be with.- we broke up but got back 2gether about 3 wks l8r. we've now been going out for about a month. When he askd me back out he said he was wrong & stupid & he missed me so much & livin w/out me didn't even count as living. I, of course, melte. Lately tho he's been distant, moody & hardly speaks to me when I call. Evn when he calls me hes like that. A few days ago a girl he & I kno.& goes to school w/ him askd me if we were goin back out, cuz she heard sumthin like that, but no one was supposed 2 kno. That kinda bothrd me. Then she told me about a girl he askd out after he & I broke up. When she said no, he came bak 2 me. 2day my friend found out about, and told me that my bf told anothr grl at his school that he likd her. The other nite I tried to talk to him bout it &
he jus brushd me off

He & I talked a lot about things that we never would have spoken of if he wasnt high, It was really great but I think its rather sad that one of the best conversations we've had in a really long time was while he was on drugs. I don't know what he had but he's a few sugeries and kept the painkillers... aparrently he been doing this for about a year...I'm the only one he's told I don't know if I can leave him though.. I love his family & his mom is great friends with my mom. His 4 year old niece adores me & in the past he's been so great to me... before we were even going out he drove 2 hours to randomly come see me cuz I was going away for a week. I didn't know he was doing that till he showed up with a rose in hand. I really do love him, if I do leave him how can I be sure it won't be a huge mistake... Sometimes we have really great times together but right now neither of us is happy. We were when he was high and being honest, It makes me really sad...what should I do? thanx 4 ur help

there are so many things I love about him. and so many things he's done for me, I feel like I can't just dump him. Yesterday thimgs were better.... and i'm not trying to sound petty or anything but for the past 2 weeks everytime i've told him i love him he never ever says it back. the only time he said it was when he was high. I don;t actually really mind him being high. I just wish he would love me when he;s sober and sane... I'm not arrogant or self centered. I'd do almost anything for him, I'm not hidiously ugly, I've modeled before. people I know have told me I'm fun to be with and I have a great personality. (which of course depends on your pointe of view) but I really can't help loving this guy...any advice at all would be really great. please say something... please, tell me what I should do. P.S. sorry for all the bad spelling, it's the only way I could make it all fit.

Thanks for all your help guys.

I really needed that. Hopefully soon I can get up the courage to do something... I think this is a start. Thank you all.

Answer 1

i had a bf like that. when he was high we would have a very good conversation. but when he wasnt high he would hardly talk. well that is an addiction and it wont go away. you will not get what you want fully in a relationship like that. he's not the guy you think he is. you are talking to his drug and not to him. he also has other women on his mind and that is not good. you need to tell him to het help or you have to go. but most likely you will have to leave becuz most people with an addiction dont think they have a problem. good luck.

Answer 2

First of all, address to him as a friend your concern about his "getting high" episodes.
He is doing this to escape from something.
The fact that he finally opens up to you when high proves this.

Your feelings seem to be more of love for a friend than in love.

The fact that he may have asked another girl out right after breaking up, is typical for most guys - effort to try and move on.....
something to fill the void.

But you both must be totally honest with your feelings in order to know which way this relationship is going - secured as friends or more.

Best wishes!

Answer 3

Getting a nostril activity wont improve your self assurance. Acept your self and then maybe you could attempt to alter your appearence. look a your self in the mirror and surely look at your self. women wont say your warm in the experience that your no longer. (pitty doesnt artwork). in the experience that your going to allow somewhat piece of your face administration your existence, self assurance and your person experience of atractiveness in the direction of your self then thats undesirable. in case you think of it is going to somewhat make a transformation then flow forward and do it yet face the consecuenses and unfavourable aspects. Dont do it in case you're insecure. Love your flaw and then think of roughly it (plastic surgical treatment)... playstation .- the guy who has a fluctuating self assurance, yet is a advantageous, exciting, gentleman form with the crooked nostril isn't much less ATRACTIVE in any respect. yet!!! be carefull because of the fact some who's insecure, yet has the face of an angel, is two times as gruesome. PEACE

Answer 4

You should definately break up with this loser. He doesn't care about anyone but himself or u and thats wrong! He sounds like a real character about this and I don't even know why you got back together! This is a waste of time! MOVE ON!

Answer 5

ask your self if his depression and mood swings the way to happiness for you ?you don't trust him,you can't get an honest answer from him.his family caring about you is great but no reason to subject your self to his life style to be friendly with them.you can stay in this mess and be the care taker and end up used up and tired or you can say adios.The choice is yours.Happiness on your own or misery with an unstable,uncommunicative man.hmmmm????

Answer 6

You need to get your feelings in order think this situation through objectively then sit down with your boyfriend and have a open honest talk about what he really wants.

Answer 7

it sounds like you just felt sympathy to him. I think that it's not love though.....
the advice that i can give you is to continue supporting him until he gets better. Now, when he's better....try to figure out if what you feel for him is really LOVE....you'll find the answer in your heart. Hope this helps....Good luck.... ; )

Answer 8

Sounds like your putting too much into this relationship and getting absolutely nothing in return. I think maybe you should think with your brain and not your heart. You sound like a sweet person who deserves a lot more.

Answer 9

DUMP HIM!!! He is a waste of time and emotionally energy. Guys like him end up being jerks and sometimes phyisically and emotionally and mentally abusive.

Answer 10

Tell him you have to have a serious talk about your problems or it's not going to work if you really care about him get to the bottom of this fast if not ditch him.