cheating in a relationship but now a working relationship?

Question

hi all,
i mainly want to know if anyone's in a relationship right now that is "blooming" but brief infidelity has occured in the past. (preferably answers non-married couples..., and perhaps young couples) but share anyways!
here's my situation...

i'm 19 and i just found out i'm pregnant, after my partner and i found out i was pregnant, he later confessed to me he cheated on me on 2 occasions, with the girl he left for me, we've also had a lot of fights and so i think that contributed to his cheating. he made out with the girl on 2 different occasions, apparantly they didn't go farther. he admitted that it was because he still cares about her and said he's sorry and he told her about what happened with us and that they won't speak to eachother again (she said she doesn't want to anyways) do you think i can trust him? we've only been together for 4 months....

by the way, please do NOT make any comments on this, i will be aborting the child. i am 1 month pregnant, i'm in a top 30 university in the US and i am not giving up my life. i am also pro choice so my decision is made. my mother will not support me either so my decision is final, so please please don't comment on this!!!

and i know it's my fault for not using birth control. i learned my lesson and will start using it....

well a large part is that she lives 2+ hours away whereas we go to the same college so our relationship works out. and he claims he does care about me. and that he was going to confess to me even if i wasn't pregnant....

well, for now i am staying with him just because i need the emotional support. i think i am already in the dumps and walking away won't do me any good yet, until at least after the abortion....

i've been cheated before and those times i HAVE walked away, but this time it's much more complicated than that i think.

but i'm just wondering if there are any couples out there who have a great relationship now despite having infidelity in the past....

thanks

the fights we've had were actually about HIS insecurity, i've been faithful but i'm not a very open person so he thought i was rather shady and doubted me, i've since gained his trust but now he's lost mine =(

the fights were recurrent, so it was like a part where our relationship was going downhil...i guess he was mainly insecure because he himself felt the temptation, then later on he felt even more insecure because he knew if he could do it, i could too...

Answer 1

HEY WELL I KN0W Y0U WANT T0 KN0W AB0UT RELATI0NSHIP THAT HAS BEEN G00D S0 FAR BUT ALS0 INV0LVED CHEATING IN THE PAST HERE'S MY ST0RY..ALTH0UGH IT IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT FR0M Y0URS..WELL 2 YEARS AG0 I MET THIS GUY AND WE STARTED DATING AND AR0UND 2 M0NTHS LATER HE T0LD ME HE CHEATED 0N ME, THAT HE HAD KISSED AN0THER GIRL AND IT HURT ME S0 BAD BUT I REALLY LIKED HIM S0 I T00K HIM BACK BUT AFTER THAT I FELT S0 INSECURE AB0UT WHAT HE WAS D0ING WHEN I WASN'T AR0UND S0 I STARTED CHEATING 0N HIM I FELT BAD BUT MY MIND WAS KILLING ME ALL THE TIME IT HAD ME THINKING THAT HE WAS D0ING THE SAME WHEN IN REALITY I DIDN'T KN0W IF HE REALLY WAS.WELL IN T0TAL I CHEATED 0N HIM WITH 3 0THER B0YS..BUT I NEVER G0T THE GUTS T0 TELL AND C0ME STRAIGHT T0 IT BECAUSE I WAS IN L0VE WITH HIM EVEN TH0UGH I WAS KISSING 0THER GUYS HE WAS THE 0NLY 0NE THAT MADE ME FEEL S0 L0VED AND APPRECIATED. AFTER A WHILE I ST0PPED WE WERE GETTING T0 A YEAR AND I TH0UGHT IT WS EN0UGH AND I DIDN'T WANT T0 HURT HIM ANYM0RE THEN I HAD ALREADY.IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS AND 0UR RELATI0NSHIP HAS BEEN THE BEST 0NE EVER..BUT EVERY 0NCE IN A WHILE WHEN WE TALK AB0UT STUFF LIKE THAT HE TELLS ME THAT HE FEELS LIKE I HAVE CHEATED 0N HIM BECAUSE S0 MANY 0F HIS FRIENDS HAVE T0LD HIM.. AND I STILL D0N'T HAVE THE GUTS T0 ADMIT I DID ALL BECAUSE I L0VE HIM S0 MUCH AND D0N'T WANT T0 L0SE HIM.BUT BESIDES ALL THAT DRAMA 0UR RELATI0NSHIP HAS BEEN S0 G00D EVEN TH0UGH HE CHEATED 0N ME 0NCE AND I CHEATED 0N HIM 3 TIMES..THR0UGH ALL THIS I REALLY TRUST HIM BECAUSE HE WAS MAN EN0UGH T0 TELL ME WHAT HE HAD D0NE. S0 IF Y0U HAVE REAL TRUST IN Y0UR B0YFRIEND TRY AND MAKE IT W0RK..

Answer 2

You have to trust your heart. It's possible that you can trust him, however, your relationship is SO new. You all need time to REALLY get to know each other. You should JUST begun having sex. You can't know someone that well in such a short period of time. Take it VERY slow and guard your heart.

Answer 3

If he starting cheating after a fight, then he is a guy not ready for a real relationship. He is not trustworthy and at 19 you do not need such troubles. Hell, avoid guys like this at any junction in your life.

Answer 4

ah, first off, its called the condom, not the pill. the pill or whatever you use might mess up your hormones, and it might mess up your period dates and all.

as for trusting him, just watch where he goes, and if you suspect anything, ask him about it. fighting is also a big thing, so try to defuse them. if you two get a moment, talk about the future. ask where he wants to be in, say, 20 years. like i said, just keep an eye out for what he does.

Answer 5

u seem smart enough to know that such a cheating FCUK as your bf can NEVER be trusted again! kick him to the curb!

Answer 6

YOU'VE BEEN DATING HIM FOR FOUR MONTHS............NO YOU CANT TRUST HIM. HE'S PROBABLY WITH HER RIGHT NOW.