What expectations do you have or will you have for your children?

Question

My husband and I just got back from a long road trip--while we were talking we thought about expectations and the good and bad effects they have on children/teens.

What do you feel about expectations parents give their children? What expectations do/will you have for your own children?

Thanks!

Personally, I think expectations are a great thing--realistic expectations. I think it’s gone to two different extremes--the parents who expect nothing and the parents who expect too much or try to live their life through their child. I feel it’s important to have high expectations but not to the point where love is a question.

I was always expected to try my best (school, housework, extra curricular activities, and everything I did), put effort behind anything and everything I do, not pass judgment, and be respectful. These in my opinion are realistic and I will do so for my children. While my parents expected exceptional grades from all of their kids if we got a “C” on a report card and they knew we tried our best--they let it be but always added in to try harder next time.

I was always expected to try my best (school, housework, extra curricular activities, and everything I did), put effort behind anything and everything I do, not pass judgment, and be respectful. These in my opinion are realistic and I will do so for my children. While my parents expected exceptional grades from all of their kids if we got a “C” on a report card and they knew we tried our best--they let it be but always added in to try harder next time.

In my opinion, expectations go to far when a child's best is not good enough. All you can ask for is effort.

Answer 1

I expect my children to reach of their dreams. To get a good eduction so they don't have to settle at what they will do for the rest of their lives. I expect them to be respectful, be upstanding citizens, to follow their beliefs in whatever God gives them peace of mind and of heart. I expect them to be tolerant of other values and beliefs and not pass judgements. I expect them to love life and value it, and I expect them to do the best that they can in whatever they do. I expect them to listen to the opinion of others and respect that opinion even if they don't agree with it and lastly I expect them to give back to their communities and take nothing for granted. That is all I can expect. I want them to live their lives with full and happy hearts and to remember that others have value and knowledge of that is the best reward they can garner.

Answer 2

I think that there are not enough expectations placed on children in todays society. I will expect my children to believe in God and conduct themselves accordingly. I will expect my children to graduate from high school and acheive some sort of higher education so they are able to provide for themselves a good life. I will expect to never have to visit one of children in prison or jail. I will expect them to be married before they make me a grandmother. I hope that they find happiness, fulfillment and success. I will love them unconditionally and they will know this every minute of every day of their lives. They will also know that my expectations for them are only there because I don't want them to struggle and suffer the way so many people do right now.

Answer 3

I think that having expectations is a way to let yourself down. If you don't expect too much, you won't ever get disappointed. But I do have high hopes for my kids though.
With that said, I hope to see them married, with kids, success in their jobs, and serving God. I want to be included in their lives, and I would like our family to be close for eternity.
I think a lot of times, parents have unrealistic goals for their kids. Ones that are good for society, not for the child or for the family.

All in all, I just want my kids to be happy and healthy, in a great relationship walking with the Lord.

Answer 4

My only advise on the matter is to give them all the love and wisdom that you can, they are only small for a short time and then they are gone, married and have kids of their own, hope that they will carry some of the love and wisdom that you showed to their children, my two girls grew up to be good, proud people and I'm lucky, as I have five beautiful grand-kids, as an old man I couldn't be more happier with the way my children turn out, and please don't put any pressure on them and I hope that your children turn out as good as you wish them to be. All the best.

Answer 5

The only expectations I have is for them to do well in school and be the best people they can be. The future is not mine to see so there is no reason to have expectations beyond the present.

Answer 6

Hmmm...that's a good question. I've always wanted my children to be compassionate and socially aware. I would like them to go to college, but that's their choice. I defintely don't expect them to be religous unless that's what they choose. I'm not religious and I don't want to force any kind of religious ideas on them before they can make their own decision. And I'm all about my kids playing sports (my bf says he wants his little girl to be "girly" and not play any rough sports, but I don't want my little girl to be a priss). I played softball myself, so I'm hoping they'll be into that b/c its something that I can teach them and will give us some quality time together.

Answer 7

i do not really have expectation for my kids. i just want them 2 go 2 college and be all that they can be. i only have one in the school system this year, and he is in a gifted program. so i say if he wants he can be a doctor/lawyer. i just want them to achieve the world if they can do it.

Answer 8

I have the expectation that my 17 year old will go to college and get a degree. After that he is welcome to pick lint from his navel if he wants to (in his own house), as long as he has the options available to him that a degree will give him. (By the way, he is interested in Theater, which I am fully supportive of).

Answer 9

I don't expect my kids to be doctors or lawyers, but I expect them to get a good education and to work hard in school

I expect them to be tolerant, loving, not to judge others. I expect them to grow up and want to give back to their community.

I expect them to always treat me and others with respect and class. I expect them to be good men, who treat women right, even the kinds of women that don't treat themselves right.

Answer 10

Mine are probably lame but here goes; I do NOT want either of my daughters to be on welfare EVER. I don't want them to think that it's okay for someone else to pick up the tab when they have done something. I want them to go to college. It would be great if they had their children AFTER they were married.