How do you tell a parent their kids are too OBESE without them getting offended?

Question

I know two kids, they are not even 10 years old, and they are pretty much obese. They might be considered morbidly obese. They get little to no exercise, and their eating habits are very poor. Mom lets them drink a lot of sodas and high fat foods. I have watched these kids eat, and they eat without really focusing on the food, so they are stuffing themselves mindlessly. I think about these kids' health and body image in the future and it's sickening. What is wrong with people?!

Answer 1

I think that is awful and people like them don't need to have kids because part of being a good parent is making sure your kids are healthy and eat right. I would try to tell the parents that their kids health is going to suffer greatly if they don't get them to a pediatrician and to a weight specialist. You can also look on line and get info on weight loss camps for kids. They have them all over the country. If that is not possible, tell the parents you will watch the kids a few times a week and take them to a gym or YMCA where they have personal trainers. Most gyms and the YMCA have weight loss programs for kids. Good luck!

Answer 2

You are right, it is improper ettiquette to put such a statement on an invitation. It is great that you want too include everyone, kids included. Suggestions...you could hire babysitters for the kids during the reception. If that is not possible perhaps you can work with your DJ. If you plan to dance with your Dad first, then have the DJ clear the floor so you are the center of attention. Have the groom invite his Mom to dance part way through the song you choose to dance too with his Mom. Then have the DJ invite all the parents in the room to come out and dance with thier children. Moms with thier sons, Dads with thier daughters. Then you change to dance with your new husband, after you do that for a while have the DJ direct the Moms and Dads to dance together. Ohh and it would be soo cute if there was a part of the bridal dance where you and your groom dance boogie down with all the kids. present. You can consider this a problem or an opportunity to build family bonds. If that doesnt work for you, can you set up a separate dance floor for the kids? Decorate it so its enticing to children. Or can you set up a supervised play area for the kids at your venue. I want to tell you though, this seems like a huge deal now, but when it might not be the day of the wedding. You will be visiting with people and too busy to notice some of the things you did at other weddings. Good luck and congratulations on your pending wedding.

Answer 3

REPORT THESE PEOPLE TO CHILD SERVICES.

That is child abuse, and child neglect, and negligent endangerment, and all of that stuff.

At the very least someone -else- will tell them that they're being bad parents so you don't have to.

There are some things, however, that are more important than the parents getting offended. Isn't the health of those children more important than some wounded pride? Gather your balls and go give those parents a sharp piece of your mind! Tell them you're going to report them to DCFS or something. Take pamphlets on healthy eating and dieting and stuff. Try to be polite at first - explain "I've observed the way your children eat and I'm worried". Don't imply that it is the fault of the parents unless it's necessary. But if they just go, "Oh, no, Johnny/Janie is just a little plump, it's baby fat" DO NOT HESITATE to tell them "Well gee, maybe if you didn't let them constantly ingest junk food they wouldn't be!"

This is a situation where you need to put the health of those children ahead of both your nervousness over confrontation and rudeness and your desire to be kind. Some people just need to be smacked upside the head before they cotton on. Please, please do something. You are witnessing child abuse, and from the tone of your question you knew it, and it bothers you. You already knew what the right thing to do was.

If you can't get the parents to see sense by talking to them logically, I'm serious. Get the authorities involved. At the very least those children don't deserve to suffer because their parents are idiots.

Answer 4

If you are either close to kids or the parents, or maybe even you deal with the kids like a teacher or something, I would nicely ask to talk to her in private. And just tell her that you are concerned about their health because they seem to eat a lot of junk food and get very little exercise. Try and points out that it can be very unhealty and cause problems for them in the future. But make sure that she knows that you are concerned for them, no just trying to say her kids are fat.

Answer 5

If you're not a relative I agree with the other's comments, you really don't have a lot of say here. Just make sure your own kids don't end up like that! Try to get these kids instead to do physical activity or offer them fruits and vegetables.

Answer 6

The parents know the kids are obese. That's why they see it only as a criticism of themselves if you tell them about it. They don't know, or don't care, what can be done about it, assuming they wanted to do anything about it.

Most of these parents lie to themselves that either the obesity is natural and out of their control, or that it's a stage that the kids will grow out of.

You almost have to force them to listen to reason, and force them to look at what has happened to other obese kids later in life. And such force does tend to be seen as offensive.

Answer 7

They probably think the kids are cute like that. There's nothing much you can do about it, unless you're a family member or medical personnel. Even then, you risk a very hostile reaction.

Answer 8

If you are related to them or a friend, you can base your concerns on health. If you're not either, it is none of your business and will only offend. However, if you feel strongly about the issue (and it is prevalent in our society), then get involved in educating kids about it.

Answer 9

Why don't you try to mind your own business. The mother knows how fat her kids are. If it bothers you, just stay away from them.

Answer 10

I agree, it's sickening, but unless you are a relative or someone very close to the parents it would probably be counterproductive for you to say anything.

JMHO