we went and looked at engagement rings over a month ago and i picked one out and everything but still no ring. i picked out a really cheap one too. he still talks about mariage but he keeps saying he cant afford the ring when i know for a fact he can. all he has to do is apply for the credit at the jewelry place and the payment for the ring i want would only be 20 dollars a month. i know for sure he wants to marry me so why the hell isnt he getting me the stupid ring?
2006-11-24 11:20:06 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Christmas is coming, just wait.
2006-11-24 11:57:42 · answer #1 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're putting the emphasis in the wrong place. Is it a ring you want, or a marriage? Lots of people marry without an engagement ring. It doesnt really mean a thing. And it's quite common to get married with just a plain gold band -- the kind that lasts for a long, long time. And at some future date, when money isn't the problem it is in the early years, he can get you an super duper anniversary ring.
If he doesn't want to get the ring, for whatever reason (and you'd better re-align your thinking if you think all it takes is charging it and taking on a monthy payment) don't make such a big deal out of it. Concentrate on the bigger picture, set a wedding date and plan a small, simple wedding that you can both afford without going into debt.
2006-11-24 19:26:29 · answer #2 · answered by old lady 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
he is probably doing 1 of a few things:
1. if he already has the ring, he might be waiting for you to stop being so impatient. nothing will ruin the moment more than him thinking the ring is more important than the engagement, which it sounds like from your post.
2. he probably wants to make sure you really get the meaning of what it is to be engaged, not just wanting the diamond for bragging purposes.
3. he might not want to start off your new life together in debt from a ring. i know my fiance wanted to wait until he could afford to pay cash outright for it.
4. most importantly, he probably wants it to be a very special event, one that you will never forget. he doesn't want to feel pressure by you to just give you the stupid ring already, he wants it to be special.
take a step back and a deep breath. its not the ring that's important, its the relationship. you have a lifetime together, why try to rush it so much? if i were him and i saw you write this, i would think twice about proposing to you. you come across as shallow, and materialistic.
2006-11-24 19:29:16 · answer #3 · answered by Cassian 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is anything but stupid. He is doing nothing that falls within the definition for stupid.
You, on the other hand, clearly exhibit each and every one of the definitions offered by Heritage Dictionary:
1) Slow to learn or understand; obtuse.
2) Tending to make poor decisions or careless mistakes.
3) Marked by a lack of intelligence or care; foolish or careless: a stupid mistake.
4) Dazed, stunned, or stupefied.
5) Pointless; worthless: a stupid job.
I suggest you get your priorities straight. Marriage is a contract for a lifetime. It is NOT the purchase of an engagement ring.
I would never, never, never want an engagement ring from a man I would call stupid. I would never want an engagement ring from a man I felt was dragging his heels. I would never want an engagement ring from a man I felt could read a message like yours and overlook your total lack of respect and regard.
A man worth marrying is a man who makes you reach for the stars - a man who causes the desire to become more than you are.
If he is really is a man you could marry - you would NOT speak so lowly of him.
I wish him well.
2006-11-24 19:41:38 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm, it seems to me that you are not mature enough to get married to your "stupid" boyfriend. How old are you?! Maybe he is realizing that you are just after the ring, and not him. Isn't it enough to know that he wants to marry you? I've been with my guy 6yrs (I'm 24) and we want to get married, but there are more important things than an engagement ring...like a house, financial security, etc. Why get engaged when you cannot afford it? Then you'll be engaged for years, and no marriage will be in sight!
2006-11-24 20:39:41 · answer #5 · answered by Melissa L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you're pretty selfish. If you're saying he can afford the ring because he can get credit, then you've really got some growing up to do. First of all, that is a very bad use of credit. Second of all, why should he have to extend himself financially (and possibly overextend himself) for your satisfaction. How "cheap" was this ring, by the way, especially if he has to get it on credit? Hum? Only you can decide how long you want to wait, and if you're not willing to wait for him, move on and pressure a new guy.
2006-11-24 19:51:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relax girl you are gonna scare him off with your impatence. Maybe he thinks all you want is the ring and the money it costs. Chill. If he's gonna do it he is not gonna tell you about it. Christmas is coming so be a good girl and wait patiently. Santa may have something really big as in something really small to put in your stocking. So take a few breaths and relax before you blow something for yourself
2006-11-24 22:04:29 · answer #7 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only stupid people call the ones they love stupid , and the things they would buy for you , you can be married with out a damn ring . Maybe stupid was not the best word to refer to the man you love if he knew that then he might say bye to you stupid.
2006-11-24 20:08:19 · answer #8 · answered by missamerican_pie007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he wants to surpirse you and make it perfect. Most guys know how important that day is for the girl. I'd just hang in there, he could have bought it already and be waiting for the right time to give it to you. If he says he wants to marry you I'm sure he does, most guys don't throw that sentence out there just for the fun of it.
2006-11-24 19:23:33 · answer #9 · answered by DressageGal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello Jackie! Kelso has bought you the damned ring. Forman tried to convince him this is a HUGE mistake, but Hyde thinks you two are absolutely meant for one another...
2006-11-24 19:33:48 · answer #10 · answered by Doc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay its like this...never rush a man into marriage or you will regret it. With men you have to let them be ready for it. Women mature faster then men so it seems like you might be 100 percent ready but he still needs to get his head 100 percent sure. Its better to have him completely sure then rushing him into it and then not having a trusting and suring relationship.
2006-11-24 19:45:11 · answer #11 · answered by DrakeE 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋