My mom and dad have been divorced for years. My mom got laid off 6 years ago and has never gotten back on her feet, by her own choice. She's had plenty of chances to get herself together. My dad is not really close and an alcoholic. I'm closer to my mom's side. My mom never calls or visits (I go to college 2 hours away). When I call her, all she does is talk about herself, how much her life sucks, and how poor she is. I don't feel sorry for her because she isn't doing a damn thing to get her life together! She can barely make ends meet which means she cannot see me or my sister. Her sisters and mom (aunts and grandma) are sort of the same way. All they do is complain about being poor and how awful their lives and marriages are. I get so depressed around them that I've stopped visiting and calling. I'm trying to make something of myself and it's annoying to hear people who complain about things they can change. Should I say something to them or listen to their endless rants
2006-11-24 10:37:33 · 9 answers · asked by two_kee_kees 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Although my dad's a loser, he's proud of me. My mom and her side of the family seem jealous.
2006-11-24 10:53:53 · update #1
Get on with your life, without them. They will only keep trying to bring you down. After all, misery loves company. Finish going to school and get your life settled, then maybe you can slowly bring them back into your life.
If they ask why you don't talk to them anymore. Tell them that they are too depressing, and leave it at that. If they really want to be in your life they will change.
I have the feeling that they have lost friends over this and not just family members.
2006-11-24 11:13:06 · answer #1 · answered by frenchie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay you should talk to them let it all out. No matter what because to me it seems you got alot of things on your mind. You should stay away from them for a little while. Your mom shouldn't put you this way at all. Your in college and should worry about your studies not your mom's problem. She should really get counciling. You and her should try to do mother daughter stuff you know. Or take counsinling because you should not ever stay apart from you mother your alwayz suppose to forgive you. Well I hope you and your mother work things out. xoxo. Good Luck Hope I Helped -Diamond-
2006-11-24 18:47:59 · answer #2 · answered by ♥diamond♥ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When your family goes on about their problems, all they are likely looking for is that somebody hears their pain. I would recommend saying something to them, but read the book "Nonviolent Communication" before you do. It'll change your perspective and will probably give you a better way to speak to them about these matters.
2006-11-24 18:49:31 · answer #3 · answered by glurpy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk 2 them about fixing some stuff...try to get your mom to get a job...and her mom and your aunts. if that doesnt work and they keep depressing you just cut them out completely until they can learn 2 not do these things. its not healthy for you and its not good for the path you want to go in.
2006-11-24 19:55:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you will leave them to live their own lives and you intend to do yourself. Let them know you will visit them when they have learned to appreciate life because that will make you glad to see them. Be aware, that staying away may alienate them from you, but you will be better off without accepting their negativity into your life.
2006-11-24 18:43:25 · answer #5 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Best advice is keep things going for yourself If it's to the point where you are getting depressed try avoiding them until you feel like it's time to talk to them again. i have faith in you become something in life don't let family problems stop you from achieving your goals in life.
2006-11-24 18:47:37 · answer #6 · answered by Baby Girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would completely ignore them and live your life in college. Trust me, their pity parties will not help you in your life. They are only trying to bring you down and make you in turn be like them. LOSERS. Don't succumb to what they want you to. Live your life...don't let them live your's. Good luck and keep your head up. Maybe they will realize you are not like them. God Bless.
2006-11-24 18:45:59 · answer #7 · answered by freakykittygoddess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them only they can take responsibility and change what is happening in their lives, and that is why you are trying to change yours. Change the subject, and if they won`t do it, tell them you have to go. I admire you for doing what you are doing without no support system.
2006-11-24 18:41:09 · answer #8 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are old enough marry your man or go on a holiday for sometime away from home to get some time out
2006-11-24 18:40:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋