Ok, so I can tell this girl really likes me. She openly says that she's waiting for me to ask her out. She also says I'm sexy and she wants to make out with me. The problem is that I don't like her. She looks good, but looks aren't everything. I like a lot of things about her, but the fact that she's loud and self-centered is a turnoff. I've also led her on a little bit. So what's the best way to turn her down without hurting her feelings and still remain friends?
2006-11-24 09:06:36 · 22 answers · asked by Josh 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, you can't make it not hurt her feelings, I'm sorry to say. You can be gentle about it though. You can say to her that you like her as a friend but you just don't have any feelings for her that are romantic. You can say that you want her to keep being your friend, even though you don't have feelings for her otherwise.
Yeah, that will hurt her feelings but it's a lot better than just saying, "I don't like you."
2006-11-24 09:10:06 · answer #1 · answered by alicesarbonne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There isn't a very good way. You need to stop this cause the longer it goes on the harder and more she is going to get hurt. Let her get on with her life with someone else if she thinks that there is a chance with you she will be waiting on you. I like a guy and I have told him that I like him and I am so shy it was hard we work together at church. So one day I invited him out to eat and we ate and then I asked him if he liked me. He is such a sweet heart he told me that he considered me a friend. He didn't have feelings for me that way. But that we are very close friends. He said I feel like a big brother to you. If anyone hurt you or you just needed me for ANY reason I would be there for you. I really care about you just not in a boyfriend way. If this is the way you feel about her you could tell her this. If you want to be a "big brother" to her and be there for her let her know. I think that this would be the best way to let her know. Hope this helps you.
2006-11-24 09:13:07 · answer #2 · answered by Shell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Josh, first off, you shouldn't have led her on. Don't you know women by now???? If you would've let it be known from the get-go, you wouldn't have this problem. If you don't want to take her out, tell her. And hell, tell her why, save the next guy from the loud, self-centered side that she can't help but to let out. If you don't like it, nine time out of ten, most men won't. Let her know why you're turning her down and let it be that. Why is it so hard for US (meaning everyone) to be honest? Try it, Josh, it might not be as bad as it seems.
2006-11-24 09:13:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to tell you, but you probably will not be able to remain friends, at least not good ones. I would just tell her you are not interested, that you enjoy being around her, but not as anything more than a friend. There is really no way to avoid hurt feelings in these situations. (And if she is really that self-centered, she will bounce back just fine.) Honesty is the best policy. She will be more hurt if you go around telling her friends/your friends that you are not interested before you tell her. Good luck!
2006-11-24 09:11:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a good idea to say "I'm not looking for a girlfriend right now" so it sounds like your not just turning her down, your basically turning down every girl. Hope this helps
2014-07-04 04:37:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the truth, and the truth shall set you free. I've always appreciated a man who is completely honest with me, and in the long run, the truth set me free, too, to move onto someone who really did want me.
You might loose this person as a friend, depending on your own "style" of communication and how you break the news to her. Be prepared for that, especially since you have sort of not been truthful anyway by leading her on. Man up, dude, and tell her the truth, she might not like it, but in the long run, its the best thing for you both. The longer you wait, the harder its going to be on both of you.
2006-11-24 09:11:31 · answer #6 · answered by volkgal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK first stop leading her on, second be truthful but tactful tell her that you love her as a friend and as a friend only tell her you will be there for her anytime she needs a friend, after that day if she asks you again just say no and change the subject
2006-11-24 09:11:53 · answer #7 · answered by Bruce B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no way that's gonna happen. If she's looking to sleep with you and you won't give her the time of day she's gonna move on to the next guy. Consider a good thing. She sounds dramatic and you don't need that.
2006-11-24 09:10:54 · answer #8 · answered by cyber_music 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first appologize for leading her on then tell her that you aren't interested in starting a relationship with her. make sure that you give her the option of remaining friends (though it may not happen even if she accepts) and then give her a hug
good luck
2006-11-24 09:17:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her you think shes really pretty and any guy would be lucky to go out with her, but right now you are not wanting a relationship , tell her you just dont want a girlfriend right now because you are too busy with other things, tell her that its not her its just that your not ready for one, you want to enjoy single life for a bit longer before jumping the gun.
2006-11-24 09:09:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋