what do you think?

Question

at what age do you think women should start having children? im almost 20 and im strating to really want one and so does my fiance. we can afford to have a child but im not sure if 20 is a good age..but is there really ever a good time?? i just want to know if you think 20 is to young and at what ages you started having children of your own......thanks

Answer 1

I had my first son when I was 20 and I also have a 5 yr. old stepson with one on the way. Like you said my husband and I can afford it. If you really think that you and your fiance want to have children ...I look at it like this...when my children are 18 and 20..,.I will still be able to go and do things with them and I will still be young enough when they have their children for me to play with my grandchildren. If you guys are ready then I don't see the problem. Besides, I could not imagine being 26 or 27 trying to keep up with a toddler I'm 23 and I already get tired running around and keeping up with hime. Good Luck with your decisions.

Answer 2

I think that people should wait to have kids until they are truly settled. Get all the partying out of your system so that when the time comes you are perfectly happy sitting around with your kids, and don't feel like you are missing out on anything.

My mom had me at 20 and she never let having a child stop her from having a social life. I missed out on a lot of things because of that. She was still a great mother - but I think she could have been even better if she had waited till she was more financially stable and ready to settle down.

All that being said, some people don't need to have a wild phase and maybe you are one of them. But honestly 20 years old seems to young. To be engaged, to be married, AND to be a mother. The truth is it's hard to say whether you even know what you want. I am 27 now, and when I look back at what I wanted when I was 19/20 I am surprised at how naive I was and how much my goals have changed. I am much happier where I am today.

My advice wait (wait to get married too!) ... go to college, find out what your other options are. Then decide what you really want.

Answer 3

If you know 100% in your mind, body, soul, and heart you're ready to have a child and give up everything you enjoy right now to raise a child, then there is no age you can put on that. I was ready at 22 (so I thought), and she's been a blessing, but I had NO idea, until I had one of my own, just HOW MUCH WORK and time you have to put into raising a child. I'm not a selfish person and gave up everything for my daughter, but I realize now (I'm 27) that I had a lot more to get out of my system before I would've REALLY been ready. Just do what you feel in your heart is best for you and your fiance'. If you're ready, GO FOR IT! I wish you both the best.

Answer 4

I don't think it has so much to do with age as it does maturity. My only suggestion is wait until you have had some alone time with your fiancee. I would get married and wait a few years. I wanted a baby as soon as I got married (I was 20 and hubby was 26), but we held out (until I was 24). Turned out to be a good thing, because we hit quite a few bumps in our marriage before we started trying. You want your marriage to be nice and strong before you bring a baby into the world, right? You will miss all that alone time too. You are young! You have all the time in the world! Enjoy each other for awhile!

Answer 5

You're not 13, so it's not too early. If you both want it and you can afford raising him/her, it's ok. But you need to think first if there's anything you wanna do NOW, before the kid comes, because you won't have a lot of time for yourselves after that (at least in the first few years).
As for when is the best time, I think that for the first child you're never ready enough. I'm 27 and pregnant with twins (first pregnancy) and I'm scared out of my wits that I won't know how to take care of them and stuff, but in the same time I try to think that it will all come to me (we, women, are made for that and most of us do just fine).
Good luck!

Answer 6

It depends really. I would wait till you two get married and see how that goes for a few years before becoming pregnant. But 20 is an okay age aslong as you feel your ready to become a mom. Its a lot of hard work!!! Good luck

Answer 7

I think that a a good age to start having children is in the twenties..To have a child you really have to dedicate you mind to it. All your actions affect the child. What you do affects what the child will be later. At least until he knows what he wants in life. It's going to be a new life in your hands, and you have to be 100% committed to it. When you prepare yourself physiologically to recognize this, then your prepared and ready...

Answer 8

I waited till I was 26 but thats me. I am glad I waited. But, if you can afford it, and you feel ready thats a good sign. I personally recommend waiting till after you are married, though. Especially if you ever want to marry. If you already have kids a lot of men dont really have a reason to get married. If you have a date set, then disregard my comment.

Answer 9

I was 16 years old when I had my first and I am now married and stable and happy and I am 25 now and have 4 children so remember only you will know when you are ready to have a baby.

Answer 10

I think making the committment to marry the man you want to father your children would be a good sign that you're ready to settle down and raise a family.