I don't know what's the matter with me but I find it difficult to love someone. I can honestly say that I've never been in love or even felt something special for a guy my entire life. ( I mean I'm 20 for god's sake!) Is it because I'm so cold-hearted that I don't know how to love? Also I find it extremely difficult to trust guys and I always keep my guard up. Why am I like this?
2006-11-24 05:44:39 · 12 answers · asked by Coco 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do not worry, I promise...I am absolutely the same way. A few months I was imaging my life as a single, cold hearted, never knew how to fall in love freak. Then I met this guy. He was unlike any I had ever met. I broke up with him, but the thing I learned was that I could love, I just hadn't met anyone up until him that I could. Seriously, don't worry, just keep praying and seeking and you'll soon find someone who melts your heart.
2006-11-24 05:50:40 · answer #1 · answered by Kaylin 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps you are healthy!
Bells, whistles and total chemisrty are chemical reactions in the body that can cause people to feel euphoric and "in love." During this phase people often ignore or overlook warning signs about the other person and the relationship. Fatal attractions, abusive relationships and intense love/hate dramas often result.
Finding a friend and building a trusting relationship and then choosing whether or not to enter into a romantic relationship is a healthy way to examine the character of a possible mate.
Jealousy, neediness and demands are three relationship enders. If someone is unable to accept you as you are, is jealous and controlling and cannot do anything without you, you have found the makings for an unheathy relationship.
Focus on yourself and your needs and wants, find someone else doing the same and enjoy life!
2006-11-24 13:53:17 · answer #2 · answered by teach_empathy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello! I was just like you before.I know at your age you think your old but you're not. I was 23 when i had my first boyfriend.So don't panic that you're not yet getting in love. No one was born hard hearted. But before you could love someone you must love yourself first. There is a saying I would like to share with you, " In everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under the heaven.A to be hurt and a time to love; a time to live and a time to die..." In search of someone to love with we have to ask God's help to lead us to the right person and surely He will grant it in the right time.But in seeking love we should not be too perfectionists because we won't find everything we want in one person. If you insists in finding everything in one person you would end up alone for the rest of your life.Loving is so simple but we should always ask God's help so that you could give trust to the person you love. Thereby, you are giving a full and real love.
Probably one reasonwhy its difficult for you to love is there is someone you know or you have witnesseed who have had a traumatic experience in loving and you are afraid that you would be hurt too? But remeber this, not everyone is having the same experience about love although we are all prone to be hurt because all of us are prone to commit mistakes which is causing pain. So don't be afraid if you would be hurt. There is another saying that says, "It is better to love and to be hurt than never love at all."
I pray that you would find your heart to love. Goodluck!!!
2006-11-24 14:06:52 · answer #3 · answered by Riza 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well everyone has a problem with trusting a guy sometimes
well honestly I can say that you need to talk to someone else
if you know what I'm saying
talk to the lord
2006-11-24 13:49:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should think about the relationship you had with your parents, particularly your father. I know that sounds very Freudian, but sometimes our past can tell us very enlightening things about our present situation.
It seems to me like you may have been burned before.
Sometimes these burns can leave scars that last a lifetime.
The important thing is to realize that this is bothering you. You can work to change yourself. And, although it sounds weird, I agree with the person above who said maybe you should try dating women.
Hope some of this helps you.
2006-11-24 13:51:24 · answer #5 · answered by madcatlover7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not that you don't know how to love...you don't allow yourself to get hurt! I was like that and then I changed...I opened my heart and it did get broken and as a matter of fact...plenty times and vowed to not get it hurt again...You have to truely be heartbroken and feel the pain to appreciate how love feels when you find the right person...I say go for it b/c you'll never know until you try...
2006-11-24 13:48:56 · answer #6 · answered by angelic1302 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have sort of the same feeling, i find it difficult to love guys sometimes...i put it down to them not being the right guy for me....hopefully when i find the right guy i will love him loads and be perfectly comfortable with him and myself around him. i think the guys I've been with i didn't really love deep inside which might be why i couldn't really love them and sort of might have turned them away. i think theres still hope for us we just have to keep on looking. good luck
2006-11-24 13:51:53 · answer #7 · answered by sarapindity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me, that's a good thing. You don't like people just because of their looks, that very good. SO you like guys for who they are. You'll get marry one day with the very right guy. About the you don't trust guys thing, you just have to open up. Listen to them and you'll trust them one day.
2006-11-24 13:51:23 · answer #8 · answered by DarkAngel T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um... you're "20 for god's sake"!!
You've probably just never met the 'right guy'.
2006-11-24 13:47:01 · answer #9 · answered by Sylvie M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong.
U will find love for someone..
It devlops naturally
2006-11-24 13:46:46 · answer #10 · answered by snow l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋