CHRISTIANS PLEASE ANSWER: How far is...too far?

Question

Okay, it's a question that comes up repeatidly at school, work, and in youth groups. How far do you think is too far for a Christian to go before marriage?

I think, and always tell my other youth group members that the bible says that if ur like "sexually aroused" by looking at them by kissing them or anything then that's where you need to stop....but don't you guys think that oral sex is still sex and you shouldn't do that either? Everyone thinks that my standards are way too high and i was just wondering what ya'lls perspective on this was! Thanks again! :]]

Answer 1

"Shaking hands" - Typical christian response.

Answer 2

That question usually has the wrong motive. A person should be asking "What can I do to ensure that I remain sexually pure before marriage?".

I like what my Pastor has to say about intimate kissing. He asks why you would want to kiss someone like that if they are not going to be your life long partner?

That having been said, the obvious and indisputable answer is that fornication is "going too far". After that people ask "Well, what about oral sex or manual sexual stimulation?". Or "Does it matter if I'm doing these things with someone to whom I am engaged to be married?".

So ask yourself these questions. Wouldn't "going too far" be doing something with another person that if they were married to someone else be wrong to do? Since you are not yet married to them and God only knows if you will ever be married to that person it's best to think about it that way. If a couple are engaged and they go to the very brink of fornication and then they break up, then what?

As a mature Christian man I would want my future wife to know that I cared more about her purity and respected her enough to wait until we were married than to show her that my main priority was in using her to satisfy the cravings of my flesh. True love wants what is best for the other person even if they themselves may think that it's "OK" because they share the same sexual desires and a longing for physical intimacy.

Answer 3

you're good, God isn't a liar. yet, he's all understanding and does each and every thing in perfection. He knew that Abraham might prefer to lie as a manner to shop his spouse. God did no longer lie, Abraham did, and that i'm particular the lie became "excused" because of the fact the Lord is the guy who advised Abraham to do it. There are circumstances in the Bible, and e book of Mormon, whilst the Lord has particular prophets or human beings do issues as a manner to shop their background, shelter the gospel, or shop their lives. who're you to question why or how the Lord instructions? It would not actually matter style to me what you think of, i recognize the gospel is real and that's all that concerns.

Answer 4

The easiest answer is that even kissing is really just pre-sex.

sort of like you don't get drunk without drinking the first beer... you don't go too far if you don't have the first kiss.

The worst thing I have heard of is that some Christian teens actually practice sodomy to maintain their virginity. That's not only defined as a sin, but if you've been that intimate with someone, who do you think you're kidding if you claim to be a virgin?

James 1:5 says "Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death."


Jesus said: "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."
(Mat 5:27-28) He was speaking to older (and thus almost certainly married) people, but the same would apply to fornication.

Jesus also said, "For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man."
(Mar 7:21-23)

God's not grading on technicalities. If you go 'too far', you're sinning. I wouldn't pretend to be able to biblically defend 'petting' but not 'naked petting' or 'necking' but not touching privates. There is no rule written like that. The idea is to just not push the envelope.

Paul wrote to the Corinthains: "Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body."
(1Co 6:18)

Are you 'fleeing' if you're trying to figure out how far is too far?

Answer 5

I guess that depends on the individual Christian. I consider myself to be a Christian, but never had a stringent enough upbringing to determine an answer to this question. I was 17 when I lost my virginity, and not even to the man I married, for shame! But I've only been with 2 people in my life and I did so responsibly and in a way that I never compromised myself.

Answer 6

Your standards are not too high. God is pleased with your standards. But also know that according to the Bible, if you're both tempted with lust and desire for each other, God gave you a simple way out of it...it's called marriage.

Answer 7

Kissing to the point where you are becoming sexually aroused is too far so somewhere below that point should be ok. Not an easy thing to do, but if you love eachother will and desire the highest and best thing for eachother. That would be heaven.

Answer 8

because there are so many different christian denominations, there are many different perceptions on what is too far. for example, some christian denominations, like roman catholic, forbid things like masturbation, oral sex, and anal sex. therefore doing any of these things, especially before marriage, is unacceptable and considered too far. but personally, i think it depends on the individual's views. you cannot lie to yourself and convince yourself that having sex before marriage is not going to far, because it is. but i believe things like oral sex, masturbation, etc are okay before marriage. so to answer your question, sexual intercourse is definately too far before marriage, but if u are in a commited relationship, i dont see why you can't find other ways to be intimate without sexual intercourse. hope that helps:)

Answer 9

Any physical contact will inflame the youthful lusts, and should be avoided ! I say that fully knowing young people will ignore my warning !

Let them hold hands, maybe kiss good night, no more !

Answer 10

Well, I really do not know about homosexuals, but for heterosexuals I think the farthest a couple can go its a sweet on-the-lips kiss. Not making out, because that can definitely lead too far. But I think the thing you have to ask the people who ask how far is too far is "What is your intention?" because the point is not to get as close to sin as you possibly can without technically doing it, it is to not sin at all. I know it is a hard question, I've struggled with it myself. I will pray for you.

Answer 11

I think christianity is in the wrong for telling people how they should live, i also think all christians should die for what they did to the Pagans, Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims,and Atheists.