with girls, how do you regain confidence when you ask them out and they say no?

Question

and where are all the single girls that don't smoke?

Answer 1

Agree with you on the smoking. Women seem to be so week willed at that age most of the men abstain
Anyway
If they say no you can either
1 curl into your shell and cry about it
or
2 ask the girl next to her

I knew a fella who would go through the night club and ask 200 women to dance until one said yes. He got what he wanted and didn't think twice about the other 199 who said no

I know another guy who would at the drunken end of the night do the same trick but asking to take them home to do the bold thing. He got 199 slaps in the face but a hole in 1 at the end of it

Personally I feel your pain my friend. I hate the knock backs and the confidence dents. So I made a decision a very long time ago never to approach a girl giving the impression that I wanted her, even if I did. I would befriend her first, get her relaxed and familiar with me. Then I would wait for her to ask me. If she didn't someone else might.
I haven't asked a girl since I was a teenager and have not been without one in 2 decades. And believe me I am no oil painting. (Oil slick maybe)

Don't sweat the ones who don't want you, you cant change that. There is one or 10 out there who will ask you though. Just make sure you put yourself in the right place at the right time that's all

Answer 2

I dont smoke and besides that. You should be prepared in the first place that they might say no. Its not the end of the world. You should take the no lightly and keep going. Girls love guys who easily bounce back. But if you sulk, you cant be that attractive, can you? You should be confident in the first place knowing that if they say no, you wont die and you just move on to some one else. Girls might end up coming back to you! So I wouldnt worry at all. If she says no, she doesnt know what shes missing.

Answer 3

Henry, dating is a numbers game. The more you ask out the greater the chance of meeting the one you are destined for. And unlike baseball, all you have to do is get a homerun once, and you make it into the Hall of Fame.

Seriously though, don't let 'em see you are shaken by their rejection. If you shake your head with a sigh and say "that was a relief", as you walk away, most likely you will at least get them to wonder what's up with that. The chances are they are not rejecting you per se, but, rejecting your modus operandi. Like advertizing, you need a good eye opening approach.

Answer 4

My gf used to smoke after sex... then we started using lube:)

Seriously, like anything in life, you have to go through the "no's" to get the "yes". If you dont go through the "no's", you not trying. No one is every girls type, but if you keep asking, you'll find one... and probably much more, that think you are their type... and with that comes a yes.

Stats - For every 5-7 no answers, you will get one yes. So you need to keep asking.

Answer 5

This advice may seem weird, but don't take their 'no' personally. Fact is not everyone will say yes... and not everyone will say no. Dating is almost like a trial and error thing. Which is why when you see someone you like you have to try to ask em out, if they say no, see someone else and try again. It seems complicated and case sensitive but if you use the logic of "not everybody will say yes and not every1 will say no" its very simple and 'painless'. As for non smokers, don't look for them in bars and clubs, and its easier to find 1 in dating sites on the net, this way you can specify what you prefer.

Answer 6

Anytime i was shot down I always just said, "No? Ok, no prob. Later!" and would walk away like I wasn't really that interested but that it had been a spur of the moment idea.

A friend of mine used to play the trump card though, he'd turn it into an insult like he'd ask, "do you want to dance" if he got shot down he'd say, "What? oh you miss heard me, I said you look fat in those pants". Or if he'd said, "want to go out sometime?" he'd turn it into, "No, no, I said damn you need to bath sometime". You have to have huevos to do that though, he got hit a lot. But it was funny as all hell.

Answer 7

Think of it as experience, if there is something to learn from it then learn, if not then don't dwell on it and move on.

I am sure there are plenty of girls out there who don't smoke, are you moving in the right circles?

Answer 8

You remember that every girl is different - just because one said no doesn't mean another one will. You also remember that the girl you're asking out doesn't know that anyone else has said no to you.

Answer 9

Dont worry about it! We all get kicked back sometime. You just keep asking and asking different girls and eventually you will find a good one who likes you

Answer 10

Rejection is usually an issue with most people. Have a look at your rejection feelings and reprogramme them.
Next time you ask a girl out and she say's no, just keep it objective. ( she said no cause ur not her type it nothing personal).

If you don't ask you don't get.

Good luck!!!