my husbands exwife who he has a young child with is making my life a living hell.she hates the fact that i married her husband and has a great relationship with her son.she bad mouths me to my inlaws to start trouble,does not allow me to have any contact with the school or the sons friends.i'm not allowed to watch "ken" when my husbands not home.i have never given her a reason to not trust me or said anything bad about her in front of ken.the worst part is my husband will not stand up for me and allows her to do this.he said he can't control what she does which is true but he is constantly helping her out like giving her extra money,watching ken when its not his day so she can go out and the list goes on.this upsets me the most when my husband accomidates her when he does not have to.i understand he wants to keep peace for kens sake but should his ex wife have so much control over our lives and say and do whatever she wants and my husband just ignores it?should i just let it go?
2006-11-24 01:58:20 · 9 answers · asked by marymackey08 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
That's tough. Does he have a legal visitation agreement? If so, when 'ken' is visiting him it's not up to her wether or not You can take care of him without his dad around. I have an ex and can't stand my kids going there for visits but I don't tell him what he can/cannot do with them while they are there and he doesn't do that to me. My husbands ex does that to him. They have a daughter together and she just tortures him-has denied visitation for a year now. I definately would not pay her extra money. If the child needs something - then go buy that item, don't just send her money. It's hard for a man to stand up to an ex when theres a kid in the middle. If he has a legal agreement tell him to stick to it strickly - no extra $$. If she denies visitation then he can go to court and they will give him the missed visits on top of extra time if he wants. It's a BS situation. Hope you can stick with it and not let her tear you 2 up - that is probably what she's after. try not to give it to her. Good Luck
ps What do your inlaws think about it??
2006-11-24 02:06:53 · answer #1 · answered by Scorpio 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This stinks for everyone involved. It sounds like your husband is just trying to keep the peace but I understand why you are upset. Can you try to talk to your husband about your feelings and maybe set some ground rules? The ex-wife is probably just hurt and wants to hurt your husband. I am not saying this is right but maybe just think about how you may feel if you were in her shoes. Then from here maybe you can think of a few things that you would be willing to let her have her way about and then use that as a bartering tool with your husband. Tell him look I am willing to let her continue to do A, B and C but I will not tolerate D, E and F. If you do it this way then he knows you are trying to do the best you can to make this bad situation a little better but he will also understand that you aren't willing to sit back and let her walk all over you. Good luck with everything.
2006-11-24 02:04:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
before everything, you could by no ability WATCH your on toddler. he's not a babysitter he's a father. If his ex is going out then she could call Ken's father. He could have his son (even on days which at the instant are not area of the time table). so which you will would desire to recover from that because of the fact he's the daddy. Secondly, why do you pick to bypass as much as his college or touch Ken's friends? you are the step-mom not the be sure. this is not your interest to bypass as much as the faculty. that's what his mom and pa are there for. Now so a good distance as you not watching Ken is particularly up on your husband. he's in basic terms as lots a be sure because of the fact the mummy. once you are the babysitter on your husband then the ex would not have a situation with it. it somewhat is none of her corporation who keeps Ken while he's on your husbands care. as long as you're volatile to Ken then you definately could be enable to be on my own with him. The ex has no precise to assert something approximately that. You first would desire to be sure why it somewhat is that your husband would not bypass away you on my own with Ken. perhaps he would not believe you to be on my own with Ken. Take that situation up mutually with your husband. The ex would not have a say in that count. Who cares what the ex says approximately you? you have the husband so do not hassle lots. do not positioned anymore ability into the situation. The greater you care on the subject of the ex the greater she'll be waiting to get to you.
2016-10-13 00:44:41 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Scorpio. She is dead on with this. His ex cannot tell you what is to happen to the child when he is at your house, she doesn't make the rules there. You just have to be strong and tell your husband this is how it needs to be. You are married now so he has to consider you feelings in this situation too, not just his and his son's feelings.
2006-11-24 02:13:13 · answer #4 · answered by redheadedmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch, sounds like you need to be telling your husband this. I could suggest Marriage guidence but to be honest it sounds like you should not have married him in the first place assuming things like this when you were together before you were married.
2006-11-24 02:03:00 · answer #5 · answered by Barry Barcrest 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can do it the hard way by filing a restraining order but I suggest pray to God.
God can work miracles.
2006-11-24 02:02:11 · answer #6 · answered by Steve 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to let it go. i am a step mom, and what he is doing is the RIGHT thing. he needs to do these things for HIS child. he is only doing right by his son. and a lot of dads take crap from their ex as to not hurt the child. sorry it's not what you want to hear
2006-11-24 02:02:10 · answer #7 · answered by blondie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can file a restraining order
2006-11-24 01:59:47 · answer #8 · answered by Nuthin_Fancy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say all 3 of you get together and fk each other raw till you bleed
2006-11-24 01:59:59 · answer #9 · answered by john d 1 · 1⤊ 3⤋