my introduced me to his ex-wife without a title. he just stated my name and his ex-wife's name. i was hurt coz it seems he is not proud that i am his wife now. i asked him why - he told me he was confused on how to introduce us - like this is my present wife and this is my ex-wife. is it still a need to introduce her as ex? why not the mother of my kids? maybe he is still concern about his ex-wife feelings that she might hurt or something? i knew his ex-wife thinks i am just his girl coz everyday she screams at my husband over the phone without any reason. thus, my husband's day is ruined. maybe she was threatening me that she is still the control and i must leave. but i cant, i am the wife. am i just irrational?
2006-11-23 23:21:17 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No your not, he could have just said this is my wife and this is and said the ex's name, or he could have said this is said the ex wife's name and then said and this is my wife and then said your name.
Considering that you have just said that the ex-wife threatens and shouts at him a lot, maybe he just thought it would be easier to do that than having to deal with her. However all you can do is support him and love him and try not to deal with her drama
2006-11-23 23:35:36 · answer #1 · answered by Baps . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should be proud to call you his wife after all he married you. All he had to do was say this is my wife .... and this is ..... There was no need for any confusion that's just how it is now. I don't think you are being irrational at all. You have to speak to your husband and ask him, why would she feel threatened by you and does she still have some sort of hold on him. Why does she ring him everyday ? Surely there is no need for that much contact. You need to remind him that he is your husband now and you are not going anywhere regardless of what his ex wants. Good luck with it all.
2006-11-23 23:36:30 · answer #2 · answered by kazzadanni 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I noticed someone else said "he is the reason for the divorce".
Is your marriage the result of an affair you had with him while he was married to his ex-wife, because that would completely change my view on your situation.
You are being a bit immature. He is your husband now. Be glad that he has chosen to marry you. I think even in the most positive of situations (a situation wherein he divorced his wife before he even met you) your husband would be put in an awkward situation.
Do your best to be mature, think clearly, have integrity, hold yourself to high standards, always be honest, and think before you speak, or take a course of action. If you act this way, it won't matter how anyone else acts, you will prove yourself to be a person of quality, character, dignity, and integrity.
2006-11-23 23:40:20 · answer #3 · answered by Myrmaad 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why bother of over-reacting with his ex? Carry on your lifestyle and as long you are holding your title as legally wife presently, that is more than enough.
If she ever yells at your husband without any reason over the phone, you did the same to her exactly. Tell her that only a bi*tch will yelling madly over someone who has been dump by ex.
Lastly, you need to teach your husband a lesson by introducing your male friend to him. Do exactly how he introduces you to his ex. He will feel the pain & ego and will definately question you on why you do not introduce him as husband to your male friend. Then just replied him "I'm only following your way of introduction method".
2006-11-24 01:08:49 · answer #4 · answered by Adorable Mrs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he seems to not want to hurt her, but u are hurt, u need to confront him, and next time u meet her tell her u and him are married. there is no reason except if they have children that the ex should be talking to your husband. maybe he fears her in some way, maybe she has control over the kids, and he is afraid if he makes her mad she will cause him touble on visitation, or take him back to court for more money, maybe he is just trying to keep the peace with her.
2006-11-24 00:46:33 · answer #5 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the introduction thing was just he had no clue how to deal. I'd chalk it up to an inane lack of social grace. and lack of opportunity to practice beforehand.
As far as the screaming on the phone...lol...answer the phone, let her start and put the phone down and walk away. I'm sure he has her number . he can call if he really needs to talk to her....this is my favorite way of dealing with that calling thing.......have a good laugh. Here she is ranting and raving on the phone and he's not even on the other end!!!! It lets her vent and he doesn't have to listen to it....win, win.........
2006-11-24 01:03:43 · answer #6 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all tell your husband all and i mean everything you are feeling. Never hold out on your spouses it just makes things worse.Tell him about how you are worried what his ex is doing and that it hurt your feelings a little bit. Guys don't really think about things that much it may have just slipped his mind when introducing you. That's why you need to talk to him about it. If you don't then you will just continue thinking of reasons why he did not and you will hurt yourself more that way.
2006-11-23 23:29:43 · answer #7 · answered by faithwalker_1 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yeah, I think you're a tad irrational. Or maybe insecure is more like it. He probably didn't say you were his wife because she already knows that! Maybe you should worry less: after all, he's with you, not her; and she seems to be busy giving him lots of reasons not to go back to her. Try to have him talk to you after she gives him a hard time--he may need your support.
2006-11-23 23:34:01 · answer #8 · answered by AnOrdinaryGuy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he should say this is my wife and his ex as the mother as his children. he was wrong or maybe he did not know how to do it. it is hard for the new wife. if his ex is hurt, that is her problem. life goes on
2006-11-23 23:26:13 · answer #9 · answered by lover of Jehovah and Jesus 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why on earth do you put yourself in the position to be next to his ex and need an introduction to someone. The correct way of doing it would be to say this is bla so and so mother and this is my wife Bla bal
2006-11-23 23:44:52 · answer #10 · answered by Belinda 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋