How do you know when to get divorced?

Question

This is an honest question so please do not responed unless you have valuable advice. My husband and I get along o.k. but we fight a great deal and I think he may be an alcoholic. He drinks all the time. I dont know when enough is enough. Is there anyone out there that has gone through the same thing. We also have a 1 1/2 year old daughter to worry about if we do break up

Answer 1

My parents got divorced and it was the best thing they could have done for us. I also am divorced and have two children. Their father and I co-parent very successfully because we got out of it before we turned hateful. I knew that it was enough when he would come home and I felt like my day just got shot down the tubes. Life is too short to be with someone who is not right for you. Try to discuss it when he is sober. Try counseling for yourself as an individual first, then suggest it for family therapy. If that does not work, then at least you tried and you know that you are doing the right thing. It is a difficult decision, but just try to think if this is the man who you want to be with for every day of the rest of yoiur life. There may be someone else better suited for each of you and you will not be able to pursue that until you straighten out things for yourself first. Good luck with this sweetie, I know it is hard, but you can do it !

Answer 2

I have a similar situation last year I got married with my babys father because for the baby and that time I was in love with him. Now my little one is about to be 3 months and the baby's father doesn't live with us anymore. Plus he's an alcoholic , he's very rude and he basically said if I don't follow what he says it's not going to work out. If you have a similar situation as me than file for divorce I know I am. And I definitely pray for the best for you. God bless to one and all!

Answer 3

Ask yourself. Am I looking forward to spending the entire rest of my life with this person?

If the answer is "I'm not sure", then see a marriage counsellor. You can go by yourself to start with, until you feel brave enough to ask your husband along.

If the answer is "No!", then you have your answer. If you feel that way now, delaying is only going to make it worse. Better to leave before your child is old enough to get used to having Daddy around the house. Of course you will still need to involve him in your child's life, but she will grow up taking for granted that Daddy doesn't live with you.

Also, of course, the longer you delay, the older you and your partner get, and the harder it will be for both of you to go out and find new loves.

Answer 4

It is time to get divorced when you know there is nothing more you can do to save the marriage. And, you will know it. You probably know it right now, but don't want to quit. I knew it for a long time before I decided to quit trying. However, I can honestly say that I did everything could possibly do and more than most to save the marriage. And, no-one can take that away from me. I feel good about the divorce. And, since your asking this question, you will probably feel good too.

Answer 5

you and your husband should go thru marriage counceling and if that don't work then do what your heart is telling you to do. my opinion i think that divorce is not the way to go because if you go to church then there will be good people that will help and they will pray for you and your husband. Gods the only one that can help your marriage. If you do decide to get a divorce make sure that you and your husband can become friends after words for yalls daughter.

Answer 6

There isn't one right answer. My parents went through a divorce (as did my best friends parents) and we are perfectly fine. Divorce isn't always bad and it isn't always good. Therapy, i can't stress it enough, do everything you can to save your marrige. If that doesn't work leave. Don't stay in a relationship that doesn't make you happy. He might want to try rehab b/c alcohol makes divorce much, much worse and harder for every1. I hope i helped and good luck.

Answer 7

Alcoholism is a disease, there is help, talk to your doctor about it. There are programs for the family to help you cope and understand. If you are not being physically abused, you certainly are being mentally abused, AND the child to. Only you can decide if this is the future you want. Good luck.

Answer 8

Your problems can be solved with the help of a good counsellor. Read the web page from Dr. Phil below, it answers your question better than I ever could. Peace :-)

Answer 9

I think divorce should not be an option at this point. Murder yes but divorce no. Many more steps for you to take before divorce enters into the picture.

Answer 10

Gone to the regular counselors... they don't do any good compared to a pastor at a church. If you both are willing, with an open mind, find a church (if you don't have one)... get your counseling through a pastor. Good luck and God bless.