i jump to his defense all the time and he always agrees with me and him and his brother always talk about how awful they are YET i nearly lose it because of how they treat him....how do i stay out if it when all they do is intrude in our business and my fiancee refuses to set them straight??!!! he says that thats how they are BUT it interferes with my daily life...they are very miserable people that wants everyone else to be the same way and will stop at nothing to try and make it happen!!!!! help before i lsoe my mind!!
2006-11-23 13:54:26 · 10 answers · asked by toolate 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well prepare to loose your mind until your fiance gets a backbone and sets them straight. If he doesn't, this is what your marriage will look like with more interference each passing year.
2006-11-23 14:08:20 · answer #1 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK. They bother you because you LET THEM!
It's great that you are a strong supporter of your fiance, & I am sure that he is the better for it, but you can't get in the middle of him & his family. This is a dance that he has done with his family for his entire life, & it's highly unlikely that you are going to be able to change any of that.
I am sorry to say this but if he insists on keeping his family close in his life, then they are going to poison your relationship.
Healthy boundaries need to be established BEFORE the wedding takes place.
Good Luck to you all.
2006-11-23 14:03:33 · answer #2 · answered by No More 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should just try your best to stay out of it. I mean I know its gonna be hard because you love him and dont like to see him being mistreated, but just try to leave it alone. Dont stress yourself out because of what he dont want to stand up for. You cant help someone that dont want to be helped no matter how much you love them. He has to realise it for himself and decide to change things with them. You cant do it, let their problem remain their problem and stay clear of the situation until it is resolved.
I know you love you fiancee but there is only so much you can do for a person no matter how committed you are to them.
2006-11-23 14:05:01 · answer #3 · answered by Ask Ashlynn!!!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're only going to cause family upset by intervening.
Your fiance must learn to handle the situation himself, perhaps even to the extent of moving out of the house. Don't forget though, he has had to deal with this in his own way all his life. Don't belittle him... that's not going to be good for your relationship and keep out of it, or risk losing your fiance. I know that sounds harsh, but it's the only way.
2006-11-23 14:00:29 · answer #4 · answered by Darkwing 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I commend you for sticking up for your husband and tellig your parents that. as you would want your husband to back you up the same way. Your husband doesn't want to make a fuss for you after all he is marrying you and he's trying to think of the pain its causing you so he's taking it. but deep down it would hurt anyone so continue to stand up for him. and as far as your paretns tell them straight you will stop seeing them if they continue berating your fiance this way and that your marrying him regardless of what they think and if they want to share holidays together with you and childrene down the road you may have with them they better cfhange there toon. or your out. plain and simple. Why let them posion your marriage as they have done with there lives and trying now again with you and your happiness.
2006-11-23 20:43:49 · answer #5 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright, you're probably not going to like what I'm about to say, but I think your guy needs to man-up and grow a spine. If he won't defend himself from his parents, you can damn sure bet he won't defend YOU, when they eventually turn their evil attentions to you. The only way to get a bully to stop is to stand up to them.
2006-11-23 14:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by Stretchy McSlapNuts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey good luck with that. if i was you stay out of it, its none of your business til you are married. hisfolks were like that before you came along, so get use to it.
you still have a choice of being married to the family or moving on.
2006-11-23 14:04:00 · answer #7 · answered by just hanging around 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldnt even hang out with his parents
2006-11-23 13:56:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
avoid them
2006-11-23 14:25:22 · answer #9 · answered by george p 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give them the reality check...fire them
2006-11-23 13:56:50 · answer #10 · answered by serengeti 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋