I have a strange relationship with a woman. She's 30 years old but she's still living with her parent. She also has a curfew that she's to be home before2.00am. She's working and studying master's degree. She told me that it was her culture that she has to live with her parent before she gets married. Now I think that I could never be serious about her because I feel that she's so immature. We have been dating for 15 months. What am I supposed to do?
2006-11-23 12:14:21 · 11 answers · asked by Cool as Ice 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
I think her parent has allowed her to become totally dependent on them. She probably feels she can't go out in the world by herself. So sad because in all truth they are the ones that are totally dependent on her and she doesn't realize that. I think You are up against the wall unless you love her enough to help her work through this problem. Wish you the best of luck because if you stay in this relationship you will need it.
2006-11-23 12:30:41 · answer #1 · answered by snowflake 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that you have to decide what you want from this woman, where you want this relationship to go. After 15 months of dating she may well have expectations and you need to talk with her about it. Her culture is just that, her culture..many arab cultures restrict un-wed daughters to living with their parents. Personally I don't think that a 2am curfew is that bad..what can you do after 12 that you cannot do before? I'm 36, and married with children and i wish someone would tell me that I have to go to bed at 9pm everynight!
She doesn't sound immature..she works, she is getting an education..that sounds very responsible to me. She might qualify as somewhat naive though..would that be a better term to use? What should you do? Decide whether you are serious about her and whether you want to continue this. Is a future possible for you even? If her culture bids that she live in her parents home it might also dictate who she may marry, and if you are not of her culture it may be a moot point.
2006-11-24 01:01:25 · answer #2 · answered by KED 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Accept that the rules of her culture are completely different then your own. Is it really immaturity that she exhibits? Respecting her parents and observing her culture are very important to her and you are the one that needs some maturing and you need to start respecting her. On the other hand I wonder that since you are a women it would seem this relationship is a gay one. I wonder if this is OK in her culture and what problems this could pose in the long run. IF you are able to get past all these problems in your relationship and you want to marry to allow her to move in with you then your welcome to come by Canada and tie the knot.
2006-11-24 02:09:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her to move in with you maybe, and the women is 30 has had a long time to live, so maybe she's not telling you all the story, maybe shes on porole and was released to her parents(this one explains the curfew), maybe she has problems and need someone to look after her, maybe her parent are old and shes looking after them. Maybe shes saving for a home, maybe she was evicted from her last place and moved in with her parents. The curfew thing might have just been asked by her parent, common courtesy...
2006-11-23 23:33:31 · answer #4 · answered by Derrick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this her only sign of immaturity? Does she have & manage her own $$$? Does she have an adult personality? Respect for her culture & parents isn't such a bad thing, if it's truly "respect" and not a sign of weakness on her part. 15 months is crunch time, baby- get a ring, or end the game.
2006-11-23 20:58:32 · answer #5 · answered by lee_anne301 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like she might be doing it so she can live free with her parents.dont rock the boat and pay no rent do they pay her schooling too/Talk to her strongly about it and see if she makes a change for you.If not move on.Course 2am whats the prob.
2006-11-23 20:55:13 · answer #6 · answered by Larry-Oklahoma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats crazy, if shes not strong enough of a person to make her own decisions, shes not good for you!
2006-11-23 20:22:29 · answer #7 · answered by lisa42088 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn.
This whole thing makes even less sense if you are also a woman.
2006-11-23 20:21:56 · answer #8 · answered by -.- 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you don't like the way she lives her life, then leave, it will never work.
2006-11-23 20:17:50 · answer #9 · answered by ~muffun~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
her parents need's to let her grow up
2006-11-23 20:17:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋