am a working mother of a 4 months boy when i come from work am tired have to cook take care of the baby at the same time and he wants sex at the end of the day. i dont know how to tell him that this is really killing me. i cannot be doing it every night. how should I tolk to him and make him understand when i say am tires i mean it.
2006-11-23 03:12:39 · 17 answers · asked by plumphesh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Lucky you. My husband dun even WANT to have sex with me. Can we trade husbands?
2006-11-23 13:23:36 · answer #1 · answered by bleurose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm. Sit him down. Tell him that you love him and then tell him how much you also love your baby, your house and your job. How lucky you are! Then explain in smiles and kisses of one syllable that you are giving so much of yourself to these other things that when it comes to sex, you are worn out and not in the mood. I wonder if he (as a male) can possibly understand that, if you don't have a flag pole to tell you when you need it, you know anyway!
Seriously, you sound as if you are in need of a holiday/vacation, so that you can have some time to wind down and be romantic with your man. You two need to talk about that. It will be a few months down the line (because 4 months is a little young for you to leave him if you are still breast feeding) but when you have weaned him off the breast, make sure that your next priority is your guy.
If you talk about/around it like this with him, he will begin to understand - I seriously HOPE that he will begin to understand! - that you are a person with needs (just like him). Also your son is a person with needs and your boss is a person with needs and your house/family is a 'person' with needs. Some, at least, of those, he can help satisfy.
It's hard to advise how not to be antagonistic when that's the way you are feeling. Take a deep breath, girl, and dive right in!
Edit: DON'T make it a deal - the whole thing HAS to be made in love between you.
Edit again: I am a male, by the way (but an older one ;) ) I have two daughters about your age and am coping with a marriage that didn't quite go the way that I am advising you to deal with it ... I sincerely wish you better luck than I had.
2006-11-23 03:50:27 · answer #2 · answered by pica_septima 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does he do anything to help with the baby? Because if he helped you out with the baby or cooking, and just give you a break from those things, you might be more interested in sex. But also because your still trying to get back to normal from having the baby, and plus your job and housework is taking it's toll on you. Having a baby changes things, including sex.
He needs to realize that things won't be like they were before the baby. Tell him that your tired, but you would appriciate his help with the baby and other things around the house, that if he helped you with those things, you may not be as tired. But that when you are tired, you just can't and you need your rest. He needs to realize that having the baby takes alot of your time. Sounds like he's jealous because he's not getting all your attention.
I hope that this helps.
Take care, God Bless & Happy Thanksgiving
2006-11-23 03:32:03 · answer #3 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing! If you don't give (have sex) him, wait he "makan" outside then you know!
I know you are weak and tired but your husband don't understand you. I can more or less see your huband received low education standard. Pardon me for saying.
My friend has the same problem as you. Damn weak than you. One day, she collapsed at home and her husband became very-very good to her. Hah...sex life once a week till she became better.
May be one day, you pretend to faint and sit in the star-case. See how it happens. I am teaching you something good. Take my words
2006-11-25 17:02:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get a job (if he don't have one) and to cook and take care of the baby and you'll stay home (if he didn't have a job) and want sex all the time. Let's see how long that last.
2006-11-23 03:20:47 · answer #5 · answered by rupmsn2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is what u should do.Tell him that if he wants sex every night then he has to help with dinner and the baby.Let him know that u are not super woman and your to tired to enjoy love making.Then ask him this. You do want me to enjoy making love to you don't you??? This way you have made him aware of the problem. Then it will be his choice on what he is going to do.Either help u or go without.Good luck
2006-11-23 03:27:19 · answer #6 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be upfront and user-friendly! somewhat! permit him recognize what your day contains and why you're drained. If he can not understand that, this is misguided on his area. A shrink in intercourse and intimate moments could desire to grow to be a issue, somewhat quickly in case you all do no longer nip this in the bud. you ought to evaluate transforming your time table inclusive of your toddlers to make extra loosen up time for your self so which you're no longer as drained. no longer in basic terms to be launch potential for intercourse the two! purely 'you time', and doubtless putting the youngsters to mattress early or designating a exciting day for 'intimacy'. the opportunities could desire to be endless. You all ought to sit down down and communicate approximately it the two way.
2016-10-17 10:47:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well for one thing he waited for nine months and it can be frustrating on both parts. I do understand where you are coming from because i have kids too.But once or twice a week wouldnt hurt.
2006-11-23 04:34:31 · answer #8 · answered by toofavorable 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this shows that u dont love him at all.try to satisfy him whatever he says.if u dont he will go to a pros and let the pros satisfy him.All he hv to do is pay abt $40 to $80/-and he can hv good fun.Honestly , eventually he will goes to one sooner or later.So just do as he says.
2006-11-24 22:03:36 · answer #9 · answered by chasen54 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well say if he doesnt lay off it, you're gonna go on the couch. Maybe let him spend a day looking after the baby by himself, and see how he likes it! good luck anyhows!
2006-11-23 03:16:13 · answer #10 · answered by Lucy A 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋